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Having sex with new partner with dcs in house

96 replies

user1485102013 · 06/02/2017 20:08

Been dating a month and made things official yesterday (see other complicated thread if interested).

He says he doesn't understand why I don't feel comfortable having sex when dd (2) is in the next room sleeping.

He's been round twice after she's gone to bed and it just doesn't feel right to have sex.

Am I being unreasonable here?

OP posts:
Slimmingsnake · 06/02/2017 20:38

Well he needs to be glad he's not with me..my dh had to wait 6 months before he anywhere near me....I was waiting till I got married ,so he was lucky he got sex after 6 months..we got married after 20 yrs together,so I suppose it was good we didn't wait....seriously,hon,do what feels right for you x

RedastheRose · 06/02/2017 20:39

Not being funny here but you've known him a month and he's telling you that it's not enough to have only had sex twice and that you don't feel comfortable with your daughter in th next room. He is being a demanding prick already!

Notagain2017 · 06/02/2017 20:41

This is why I gave up online dating. Every single one of them wanted to come to my place for the evening when we had just met for a shag knowing I had children in the house but looking completely blank when I pointed that out.

You are considering your young daughter but he is just thinking about getting his end away.

CookieLady · 06/02/2017 20:41

Come on, Op, you're deserve better than this loser. Ditch him.

Notagain2017 · 06/02/2017 20:43

It's ok when you know and trust someone but you have only just met him, he's being pushy and from what other posters have said, he's a complete knob anyway.

user1485102013 · 06/02/2017 20:44

I thought we clicked and had a similar sense of humour etc but alarm bells are ringing.

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 06/02/2017 20:46

You can clearly hear the alarm bells but you appear to be mistaking them for something else.

You know that he's pressurising you. You know he has different values to you. You know you're finding it difficult to say what you think when you're with him.

Think of the kind of man you deserve. A decent guy who doesn't live with his parents who wants to get to know you properly, who respects your child's home and your decisions.

This is not the man for you. He's actually bloody horrible.

user1485102013 · 06/02/2017 20:48

You're right. Time to end things and move on.

I need to sort my head out before dating anyone else.

OP posts:
MuncheysMummy · 06/02/2017 20:53

I've gotta agree on this it's perfectly normal to have sex in the same house as your sleeping dc...it's the bloke your having the sex with that's the issue!

My DH and I have sex in the same room as our 7minth old DS as he still sleeps in a Chicco bedside crib on my side of our huge bed... we just move right to the other side and only once he's in a deep sleep of course and we are silent! I have no plans at all to move him out of our room until I absolutely have to so this has just naturally happened over the last 7 months.

Pissedoffhousewife · 06/02/2017 20:56

I wouldn't have a boyfriend I'd only known for a month in the house with my DC. As PP have said, don't be pressurised into anything no matter what other people think is ok

AnyFucker · 06/02/2017 21:00

If you really are that other poster, I don't quite believe you have seen the light about this bloke in the course of this thread Sad

Marmalade85 · 06/02/2017 21:02

No way should this bloke be staying at yours so soon. How do you know he isn't a pedophile that prays on single mothers?

user1485102013 · 06/02/2017 21:04

AnyFucker I am the other poster unfortunately.

OP posts:
piefacerecords · 06/02/2017 21:05

Have just caught up on your other threads op

On every single one you seem to agree that he's a loser and you're going to dump him. But then a couple of days later you start another thread about him.

What's going on? Why don't you think you deserve better?

AnyFucker · 06/02/2017 21:06

You still went ahead and started letting this creep stay at your place despite the advice you were given last time ?

And you have had a sudden turnaround after a couple of pages of this one ? That doesn't ring true to me.

piefacerecords · 06/02/2017 21:10

MN really depresses me sometimes Sad

AnyFucker · 06/02/2017 21:12

Me too. I hope it's not real.

Pissedoffhousewife · 06/02/2017 21:14

Just read your other thread. Why are you still with him and also wasting your time posting about him? DUMP HIM!!!

RainbowsAndUnicorn · 06/02/2017 21:17

There's no way a stranger (nobody knows a person after just one month) would be in my house with children present let alone the sex issue.

user0000000001 · 06/02/2017 21:22

Are you the OP who is being made to feel guilty for snogging another bloke (and being made to grovel by this guy, who you aren't even exclusive with???)

Really? Really???

C'mon OP, surely you see this guy is a complete loser??

user1485102013 · 06/02/2017 21:24

Ok now I feel guilty for letting him come round in the first place.

This is real unfortunately.

OP posts:
user1485102013 · 06/02/2017 21:27

Low self esteem. Zero confidence.

I feel undeserving.

OP posts:
user0000000001 · 06/02/2017 21:28

Don't feel guilty for letting him come round...

But seriously this has more red flags than a pile up at NASCAR.

Run for the hills... seriously. Before this guy does some serious damage to your self esteem.

GabsAlot · 06/02/2017 21:28

if u dont even know him well and nor does your dd then no its not ok

he shouldnt be pressuring u at all whever you are

user0000000001 · 06/02/2017 21:29

Low self esteem

I can see that (and before DH, I've been there)

But this guy is going to do nothing to improve that.

Would you want your DD to date someone like this in 18 years?

If not, get rid. Otherwise that is the expectation of relationships she'll grow up with.

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