WWYD? Spotting someone on MN.

[whatyouarerealpeople]

I spotted someone I know on MN tonight. I would never have guessed it was them. They posted a while back about an issue and I read the thread at the time none the wiser. I'm now torn whether to mention it or pretend I never saw it?

Has this happened to anyone else?

This is all meant to be anonymous so if I were you I would saying nothing. Posters can offload here about all sorts of problems which maybe aren't unique, Keep schtum.

Regina I have!

OP, it's not me, is it?

a teen friend of dd was on here and i was pleased to see that she seemed to take some of the advice given - ltb -which she did soon after she posted on here, so thank you to you wonderful mners who helped her

I'd want to know.

I recognised a friend on here and told her. It was very obvious it was her. It wasn't a scandalous thread, and she'd name changed for it so I don't know her regular name. She knows this user name for me, I tend to name change every few months (maybe, if I can be bothered!)

I dint post anything exciting so I'm not bothered if any recognises me.

Sure my SIL knows my username as I've posted pictures of my cats but I don't put anything on here that I wouldn't say in RL or that I wouldn't tell her

BTW SIL thanks for going and getting us medicine the other day ❤️

I imagine I'm identifiable fairly easily with an advanced search. I used to frequently name change but tbh I'm past caring now. I don't say anything I wouldn't in real life so I just own it. I would just name change if I had something I wanted to keep private.

I would just ignore if I noticed someone I know. It's very difficult to be sure anyway for most people as so many have the same numbers of kids, similar jobs etc.

Well I'd want to know if it was me. A casual 'hello how are you' via another medium (text, fb) would do.

I know people have recognised me before on here and I didn't mind, I haven't name changed or anything. If I have something more embarrasing or confidential I want to ask MN about I name change though!

I have to be honest, I don't understand why people post these kind of threads.

So you think you've recognised someone. Surely you don't need other posters to tell you that you should keep quiet and not tell her you know who she is? This is not particularly directed at the OP, but I've seen several of these kind of threads and I can't imagine that many people on MN want someone contacting them to say 'I know who you are'.

Pidgey. If I had spotted someone I wouldn't be too bothered. But this is another poster I have chatted in detail with about their problems. I had no idea they were the same person. I am in limbo because I feel like I could help more in 'real life' but don't want to compromise their outlet. If the posts were all about their cat or something I wouldn't be having any issues.

I was chatting to a new face in town one night and as we swapped life stories she said "oh my god, you're XXXX from Mumsnet!" I was . (Name changed since for other reasons).

it was a bizarre moment but she never outed me to anyone and has been very supportive.

It's a tricky one whether you should say anything or not. She might value the privacy she has on here and may name change if she knows you know.

I think I'd try to decide if I recognized her because she mentioned something that is highly likely only I would know/recognize or if it she'd put enough info on her thread/posts that she would be easily ID'ed by others. If the former I'd keep quiet, if the latter I'd first try by way of one of those generic 'you've put a lot of info on here, maybe you should ask MNHQ to delete' type posts. If that didn't work, I'd PM.

You should name change, Pm then then throw away that username. Give them the chance to change their name.

What iwish said.

I recognised someone from on here. It was a really tricksy awful situation that I struggled with and took professional advice on, but in the end I had to flag her posts to people in RL. Bloody horrible. She got the help she needed tho. She seems happy. I had no choice.

I've been spotted twice on here. One was a friend who emailed me and said "ooh are you MrsC, I recognised details of your DS" or something along those lines...I have no issue with being identified so was happy to confirm. I don't care either way if she knows, she's a decent sort!

However....

On the other occasion, somebody knew I posted on here/or spotted me (or the situation which was specific) in relation to my ex-h's affair and our subsequent divorce and legal proceedings which had run into 3,000 posts. This became a kerfuffle, my ex-h posted on my thread with some quite horrific comments and ex-h and OW went to the police and indeed printed out all 3,000 posts and submitted them to the court to have me "tried" for contempt . Neither were interested. Conversely, I was delighted by this development!

Thus, if I really did recognise somebody on here I would tell them...and give them an opportunity to name change if they so wished. By virtue of that conversation OP, you may be able to help more in RL or feel more comfortable with offering to do so.

What iwish said

I got recognised by a friend. She let me know.

I also think I recognise someone, but since I am not 100% sure I haven't said anything. Its not someone I know well, but there is enough there to make me think it is

Good lord Mrs c how stressful!

I'd do what iwish said

Also what are the chances? Surely it would be so so so unlikely.

I recognised a friend of DH's. But she used to post mainly about schooling issues, in a borough that is not ours. I quite honestly have forgotten her user name now.

I also recognised an acquaintance who was a better friend of another friend. I am a fb friend only of hers and knew she was having a hard time of it so sent her a fairly bland 'want to catch up for coffee' sort of fb message. She declined, and that's it. I sort of notice when she posts, but obviously never have mentioned it to anyone in real life.

whatyou OK fair enough. Sorry, I wasn't trying to have a go at you! If it was me, I think I'd leave it and not say anything, to be honest.

It would bother me if someone recognised me. I come here to be anonymous.

If it was me I would not want to know.