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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Many, many people took recreational drugs in the 90s. Where are they now?

999 replies

perhapsiwill · 02/02/2017 07:47

I'm not a drug addict and none of my friends were at the time, we just took Es at the weekend, sometimes other drugs. We all went to work or college, seemed like everyone else did this too. We had a great time, weekends were for dancing and hugging, I didn't get on with drunk people and one night stands and it suited me much better.
I moved away from where I grew up, nice area to another nice area.
When I mention partying in my youth to other mums where I live now, they look at me as if I'm an addict who needs help Confused.
Are they all pretending? There were thousands of us doing this so where are they now? And why do people who never took drugs appear to feel so morally superior? One of the women where I live openly talks about cheating the system financially yet looks at me like I'm scum because I went out and had fun 20 years ago. (And probably once a year now!) I feel that because I mentioned this one evening in a pub I have alienated myself from the local mums.

OP posts:
downwardfacingdog · 05/02/2017 19:51

Well this thread has gone to shit hasn't it? I don't think many of the people taking a few Es on a Saturday night in the 90s or 00s are any more likely to have ended up under a bridge with a needle under their arm than anyone else just out drinking alcohol. Jesus.

OP Josh Winks HSOC is my DH's fav Grin

Greta84 · 05/02/2017 20:16

People talk about recreational drugs like they're a joke. Well they're not. It's not always bright and cheery happy tripping. I lost a cousin to an overdose at the age of 24 he was in the prime of his life. He was doing a usual pill/hit whatever the fuck people want to call it. He collapsed in his shower and died. So fuck this recreational use because that's what he was doing and he had done it loads before and didn't know that this pill was going to be the end of him. So take all the risks you want but don't glorify this disgusting horrendous practice of drug taking. Romanticing your hedonistic ways. It's reckless behaviour. Behaviour that kills and destroys lives.

BenadrylCucumberpatch · 05/02/2017 20:24

Chickenkatsu

Oh, everywhere we used to go has also long since closed Sad

I'm subscribed on FB to the same acts/DJs that we used to see back then, and if it's do-able we'll travel to an event in an unfamiliar place. Usually all nighters til 6am, then head for a few hours in the hotel before coming home.
The atmosphere is still bouncing and fun, I love it.

We gave up on Creamfields a few years ago though, when it became full of Ketamine and posers, it ruined the atmosphere completely IMO.

CoteDAzur · 05/02/2017 21:34

I'm sorry about your cousin Greta. However:

"He was doing a usual pill/hit whatever the fuck people want to call it. He collapsed in his shower and died."

Not sure what "a usual pill/hit" is supposed to mean but it sounds like you don't really know what he took (if he did) and why he died.

"this disgusting horrendous practice of drug taking. Romanticing your hedonistic ways."

Tell us how you really feel, why don't you Grin

Sorry, I shouldn't make fun of your obvious distress, but even if your cousin actually died of a single pill (sounds unlikely that was the cause from what little you tell) YABU just like you would be if you know of someone who died because of alcohol and then went on to shout at people talking about having a great time when out having a glass of wine.

I like a bit of hedonism and frankly thinking back to that glorious period of amazing & carefree fun over a decade later as a middle-aged mum-of-two, "romanticising" those "hedonistic ways" sounds about perfect to me Smile

BenadrylCucumberpatch · 05/02/2017 22:03

I think with a lot of Psychiatric drugs we'll be horrified in years to come that we (the Psychiatric profession and society) were giving it to people and view it in the same way as insulin coma therapy or giving phenothiazines to the point someone developed Parkinsonian symptoms because that meant it was a 'therapeutic dose'

I agree Fallon. I've seen what Olanzapine and Risperidone can do to a person who you love and just want to get better.

An almost catatonic state for a start, jerking and almost stone stiff joints, excessive salivating, and tardive dyskenisia - all at 'therapeutic doses'.
At one stage a friend I have had destroyed the skin on the inside of her mouth and had panic attacks when her tongue would cramp from the uncontrollable movements in her face, she would choke on her tongue and need sedating. Again "therapeutic dose" Hmm

If i were to ever present with a mental illness, you bet your life that my primary treatment would be volunteering on pilot schemes with unregulated drugs.
Having seen the decline of people I know who have needed them to 'function' if you call that functioning I'd rather go down the route of DMT, Ketamine, Psylocybin or MDMA type substances than any anti-psychotic presently on the market.
Rather that than the possible alternative.

BenadrylCucumberpatch · 05/02/2017 22:07

I like a bit of hedonism and frankly thinking back to that glorious period of amazing & carefree fun over a decade later as a middle-aged mum-of-two, "romanticising" those "hedonistic ways" sounds about perfect to me

^This with bells, whistles and furry boots on Grin

CoteDAzur · 05/02/2017 22:13

With whistle, glow-in-the-dark Cyberdog t-shirts, glitter, and white eyeliner & mascara for me Grin

Anyone else used white mascara & eyeliner back in the day? It was fantastic, the only way for makeup to be seen in the near-darkness black-light environment of those clubs.

BenadrylCucumberpatch · 05/02/2017 22:33

Yes Cote Me Grin I was still stomping away when Bourjois brought out their original black and white mascara, and liked to use it back to front (white afterwards instead of before)..

The smell of BodyShop Dewberry body oil nowadays would probably send me zooming back to those days in my head, the body couldn't keep up
They were great days, I had the time of my life and don't regret a thing.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 06/02/2017 07:00

I think we all need to club up and get cote a 'hacienda 90s' cd and some amyl nitrate !

The best memory really for me was the music and dancing - got into far less trouble than I did with booze that's for sure ! In a funny was it was innocent pleasure bar the 💊🚬

perhapsiwill · 06/02/2017 07:37

There is a cyberdog shop in Brighton ! My nieces love it in there!

OP posts:
Surreyblah · 06/02/2017 07:42

Very rude and insensitive to question a poster's stated reason for their relative's death.

Posters on this thread remind me of RL friends who talk about past drugtaking in a wistful, proud way.

I went to those clubs, but didn't take drugs, and it wasn't that much fun for sober people IME.

Yes, alcohol is damaging. But many "recreational" drug users have died too.

Often buying drugs financially supports some pretty nasty criminals.

AnotherUsedName13 · 06/02/2017 08:46

Total aside, do we have to talk about mental illness and antipsychotic drugs like they are a fate worse than death?

I take an antipsychotic, BenadrylCucumberpatch and while it makes me groggy in the mornings and sometimes a bit slow with my words, I'm functional, I hold down a job, a relationship, a family, hobbies. Scare stories like that are very unhelpful to people who've been newly diagnosed and put them off taking their meds.

I'm sorry about your friend. If that drug suits her that badly, I'd suggest she asks her doctor for another one, but please don't assume all of us in those drugs are in some kind of living hell, unable to live our lives, because we're not.

Greta84 · 06/02/2017 09:09

CoteDAzur life is too short I believe to take those risks. You are romantascing dicing with death. The drugs you took were not made by graduate chemists wirh years of training. They were made in house/ramshackle factory somewhere. The proceeds of which funded further crime. The consequences for some families was death. If that's something to be proud of then go ahead. Show off. For the majority (probably not on this thread) it's idiotic behaviour. Those are the lucky ones that didn't get a bad pill. Those that did are no longer wirh us. That's real life.

BenadrylCucumberpatch · 06/02/2017 10:43

AnotherUsedName13

I apologise for any offence caused. However I think the chances of anyone recently diagnosed and prescribed anti-psychotics deciding they won't take their meds anymore, because I wrote about my friend and her side effects, are practically zero. I'd hope that anyone newly diagnosed has already have been made aware of the possible side effects by their Psychiatrist, before issuing a prescription anyway.

I was answering in reply to a 2 posters who mentioned them in relation to drugs and MH issues.

I'm happy that you're able to tolerate the medication without many ill effects, and of course I know that the majority of people-when they find a medicine they can tolerate well- can lead a regular and functioning life.
Some don't.

The same could be said about any drug- recreational drugs included. The majority may tolerate well, others may (and have) become seriously ill.

My post wasn't a scare story, just anecdotal evidence to support my own personal decision why I would approach other avenues before taking them myself.
If everyone was guaranteed to tolerate every medication well, there'd only be one drug per condition, wouldn't there?
One painkiller, one anti-psychotic, one anti-depressant, one beta blocker etc.
As it is, there's thousands, because not everyone tolerates everything.

CoteDAzur · 06/02/2017 11:08

"CoteDAzur life is too short I believe to take those risks."

The "risks" involved are about as bad as horse riding (said the scientist who headed the government's Drugs Misuse Advisory Council, David Nutt).

Very odd that your response to the fact that "life is short" is to be completely risk averse. I agree, life is short. That is why we must live to the fullest, enjoy our lives as best we can, especially when we are young and carefree.

I did lots of mountaineering, windsurfing, moved to another country alone on a whim in my 20s. I still love to ski down black slopes. And yes, I had great fun on some recreational chemicals, so what? I guess you just sat at home with your mummy and never dared do anything that might be ever so slightly dangerous, possibly.

The most dangerous part of clubbing I can remember was the dodgy taxi drivers in Brixton when I can out of Escape From Samsara parties at The Fridge (Anyone been to those? Grin Once I made it out by the skin of my teeth.

And growing up as a vocal atheist girl in a Muslim country was arguably far more dangerous than staying up all night on half a tab of acid surrounded by the kindest, most introspective people on Earth Smile

I like to live my life, have different experiences, and I'm ok with taking a bit of risk on while doing so. You live how you like and we will live how we like, if you don't terribly mind.

CoteDAzur · 06/02/2017 11:21

"rude and insensitive to question a poster's stated reason for their relative's death"

Such is the beauty of the internet - you get people's honest thoughts.

She said "He was doing a usual pill/hit whatever the fuck people want to call it. He collapsed in his shower and died" which does sound like she doesn't actually know what he took, if anything.

Aside from the clear lack of knowledge on what he took (if anything), the story rings untrue because nobody just goes into shower when high on a pill. The effects don't last forever, you know, and you would rather dance, have sex, or at least talk nonstop with someone until your mouth falls off while they do. Not wash your hair in silence.

People collapse and die sometimes, and it is not necessarily due to drugs. As I said downthread, 2 of my friends collapsed and died for no obvious reason. One was watching TV with her family and the other was riding his bike, so no drugs involved whatsoever, although is they were known to be habitual users, no doubt people would have assumed that was the reason and made it their lives' mission to berate people who have stopped using a decade ago Hmm

Surreyblah · 06/02/2017 12:26

There are the risks to the individual, and also the risks to others, eg victims of crime by perpetrators profiting from the illegal drugs trade.

bummymummy77 · 06/02/2017 12:34

Drugs don't kill so much?

My best friend died after having a bad e and have lost 4 others to drugs too.

There are still a shit ton of us around now with good jobs and lovely families but please don't wash under the carpet and minimise drug deaths, there were plenty.

bummymummy77 · 06/02/2017 12:41

I saw somebody get confused a drink a bottle of poppers in a world dance. ConfusedSad

While drugs probably didn't help with my depression they helped me open up and be closer to people so on balance I don't regret it.

I must say I went to a party recently where I was the only person not doing coke and was utterly shocked at what raging twats everyone turned in to! Grin

Fighterofthenightman · 06/02/2017 12:52

Actually, Prof Nutt reported that horseriding was significantly MORE dangerous than ecstacy. Horseriding resulted in acute harm once in every 350 exposures, ecstacy once in every 10,000.

bummymummy77 · 06/02/2017 13:09

Wow thanks. Her family and I will console ourselves with our 'luck' then.

AnotherUsedName13 · 06/02/2017 13:29

BenadrylCucumberpatch - but you're not just one person. You're one of wall of scare stories about antipsychotics out there, about how XYZ drug makes you a zombie/makes you fat/makes you slur and drool/means you can't think/no one will want to be around you. It's something that came up in my support group lately - 80-90% of us have had bouts of non-compliance/self medication at points, and being scared of the side effects of medication is a huge thing. Because when you are coming to terms with a scary new diagnosis, when your brain is fuzzy anyway, when life is shit, being told by multiple people "oh, I heard that makes you into something awful" is shit.

Anyway, I hope you never are unwell and I won't keep arguing this point. Of course it is your choice whatever you post. Just got a button and I wanted to point out a maybe unnoticed side effect. Grin

PoundingTheStreets · 06/02/2017 13:51

I think we need a grown up discussion on drugs. It always seems to end up in a war between the pro legalisation lobby and the vehemently anti lobby.

I fall somewhere in the middle. As part of my job I deal with the dark side of drugs. I meet countless addicts who think nothing of burgling an old lady and pushing her over in order to fund their next hit. I come across children who have to be taken into care because the parents are in no fit state to be caring for them. I come across young men who have been beaten or even stabbed because of a war over territory or even just being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Women - and children (the link between drugs and child sexual exploitation in street gangs is rife) - who have been abused. And this happens every day in just one city. It is a BIG problem. It is, however, with the exception of burglaries, quite well contained within those communities so many people can live on top of it and not quite see it.

I also come across people who have no dealings with criminality whatsoever other than trying to buy some pills or cocaine on a night out. People who hold down decent jobs, contribute to charity, have functioning families, etc. Now while I may think they're stupid to jeopardise all that and run the risk of a criminal record just for the sake of a quick high, to me it seems ludicrous that we are putting them in the same categories as those I mention in my first paragraph. This is something that is now being recognised and the criminal justice system is changing as a result - offering awareness courses rather than criminalisation and penalties for first-time offenders.

The one thing both groups share in common is that they encourage the growth of organised crime by buying the drugs. Someone mentioned up thread about crime labs in Europe. The products made in these places still has to get to the dealer, whether that be the respectable looking dealer who talks properly in a night club, or the gang member on the corner of the street. In fact, someone higher up in that same gang has probably sold it to down the chain to that 'respectable' dealer.

Fact is that until drugs are legalised they remain illegal. And while they're illegal, anyone taking them is contributing to that seedy underbelly whether they like it or not. I have more time for recreational drug users who put their money where their mouth is and actually campaign for legalisation which could remove some of these issues. There are some sensible debates to be had. Those who don't do that, however, just strike me as the sort who think that the rules apply to everyone bar them.

The other point, more pertinent to this thread, is that while drugs remain illegal, anyone taking them runs the risk of a criminal record or damage to their reputation in certain circles. This explains why some people are cagey about discussing it years later. The point of a conviction may have passed, but in some careers the suggestion would be enough to tarnish a reputation.

Headofthehive55 · 06/02/2017 14:11

pounding excellent post.
Unfortunately drug taking effects don't always show up until years later, even if you haven't used in a long time. cote that may be why your friends died, even though they weren't using at the time. It's an additional risk that you do carry for life.

You may not know you have been affected, until perhaps when your heart is under strain at a later date, perhaps by cycling, a hot shower, an operation.

Whilst it's true that life does have risks, the problem with an illegal drug is that it's very difficult to quantify the risk, particularly as the drug quality will vary. Therefore it's difficult to be an informed consumer.

CoteDAzur · 06/02/2017 14:32

"Unfortunately drug taking effects don't always show up until years later, even if you haven't used in a long time. cote that may be why your friends died"

You don't know what you are talking about. If a couple of Es gave you a heart attack 10 years later, people in their 30s would be falling like flies. 10 years ago, an estimated 500,000 Es were being sold every weekend in the UK. Where are all the sudden deaths that should follow, according to you?

FYI it was discovered in the autopsy that one friend had a congenital malformation in the heart inherited from the parent who also died of a heart attack at pretty much the same age. So no, it wasn't because she partied for a bit 15 years ago.

"the problem with an illegal drug is that it's very difficult to quantify the risk"

It's not that hard, actually. You look at the number of times used, and the number of incidents. Divide one by the other. Professor Nutt managed it and (favourably) compared it to horse riding. You can do it too, if you try.

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