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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder why it's OK - even considered a positive thing- to give girls names that are traditionally considered boy's names but....

486 replies

BertrandRussell · 31/01/2017 13:01

.......not the other way round?

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LassWiTheDelicateAir · 01/02/2017 21:27

Do the initials GRS apply?

GRS definitely means something to me. I don't work at the place which keeps the GRS but my work involves lots of references to GRS and looking at things in GRS.

FrancisCrawford · 01/02/2017 23:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

itfcbabe · 02/02/2017 10:04

I have an Ashlee he is 19 and shares a flat at uni with a female Ashley.

Billie Pipers middle name is Paul
James Codens middle name is Kimberley

I have always loved James for a girl, I remember in friends Rachel wanting it for her baby, Ross agreed she then said if its a girl he said veto this was about 12 years or more.

I do like Sydney and Robyn for girls but not for boys.

And if you want to call your daughter Beau which is a lovely name use Bo!!

satsumasunrise · 02/02/2017 10:31

No the poor child will be called B.O in school, not a good idea.

HapShawl · 03/02/2017 07:26

@milliemolliemou

"Those talking about gendered colours for children in Christian countries listen up. Until the late 19C blue was for girls, especially in RC countries, in honour of the Virgin Mary. Red, because it was a more expensive dye (and pink) was for boys. Then lo, came chemical colours and marketing. But pink was still for boys until the mid 20C."

Why would you assume that those of us who mentioned gendered claim thing were not already aware of this?

HapShawl · 03/02/2017 07:26

*clothing

Hadenoughoftumble · 03/02/2017 08:14

Have not read the whole thread but I feel sorry for any women called Beau reading this as it seems to annoy so many of you! I have fallen in love with the name since watching the show Blackish where the mum character's name is Rainbow shortened to Bow.

My Ds has what I believe is a traditionally male name but is now quite popular for girls so whenever anyone asks what his name is and I tell them they always responded with 'oh' and this face Hmm

It does get a bit upsetting on the 5th person that day.

RachelRagged · 03/02/2017 08:34

MrsJay , I know an Ashleigh with that spelling too . I also knew a male Ashley (spelt that way) . Possibly with the leigh spelt as it is at the end it sounds more Feminine. I like that speling of it myself.

LavenderRains · 03/02/2017 08:51

I know 3 female jamies. On is actually Jamie-Lee

I know a male Cody

I know a female Dale

And I know a few kims. One male and 2 female

My great grandfather was called Stacey

Grin
LassWiTheDelicateAir · 03/02/2017 13:28

James Codens middle name is Kimberley

Kimberley is a surname and a place name in England and in several former British colonies. The Earl of Kimberley, of Kimberley in the County of Norfolk, was secretary of state for the colonies in the 1860s. Using it for a boy is pretty normal.

CecilyP · 03/02/2017 14:21

...But pink was still for boys until the mid 20C."

As I product of the mid 20C, I can assure you it wasn't! When I was a child, baby boys still wore dresses up the age of about a year. But definitely not pink dresses, probably white or cream, colours that would do for both. Hard to prove as most ordinary people's photos are black and white. Though there is probably colour footage of baby Prince Charles and possibly a baby Prince Andrew in dresses - just not pink!

Headofthehive55 · 03/02/2017 14:55

My son had a pink pram!

BertrandRussell · 03/02/2017 15:26

The fact that pink is now almost exclusively for girls is reinforcing the point that once something becomes "female" it is no longer considered suitable for boys.....

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Linning · 04/02/2017 05:10

One of my brothers have what is considered a girl's name. His name is quite rare but unfortunately for him since his birth there have been both a (female) singer with the same name as him gaining a bit of fame and a famous brand of electronic devices creating a product with his name! (Grin)
He has thankfully never been bullied for it but we (his family) do tease him about it sometimes.

Italiangreyhound · 04/02/2017 05:32

Not read the whole thread but BenefitsQuestions has it right, right back at the start!

mentalfloss.com/article/65058/when-did-pink-become-girl-color

"When Did Pink Become a "Girl" Color?"

To some extent, the shift happened after WWII. “Rosie the Riveter traded in her factory blues for June Cleaver’s pink apron,” NPR said last year. “Femininity got wrapped in pink, and so did products—from shampoos to fancy fashion.”

Indeed, the ‘50s and ‘60s are full of pink moments, from the strawberry-colored Chanel suit Jackie Kennedy wore on the day JFK was assassinated to Marilyn Monroe’s hot pink strapless dress from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes.

But Jo B. Paoletti, historian and author of Pink and Blue: Telling the Girls From the Boys in America, believes the line was firmly drawn in the 1980s, when two things happened. First, it became more and more common for parents to find out the gender of their children while they were still in the womb. Excited moms and dads wanted to buy gender-specific items for their new little bundles of joy, and of course, retailers obliged.

The other main reason, Paoletti theorizes, is because mothers who grew up wearing gender-neutral clothes and playing with toys that appealed to both boys and girls wanted their daughters to be able to revel in pink, lace, long hair, and Barbies. Marketers and advertisers just made this choice seem natural.

When you look at the big picture, the “pink is for girls” trend is a fairly recent one. It may not be long before the controversial pink- and blue-tinted aisles at big box stores have been replaced by some other shade entirely. "

I do hope so!

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 04/02/2017 12:05

I know a male Cody

The only Cody I know is male. Never thought of it as a girl's name.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 04/02/2017 12:09

First, it became more and more common for parents to find out the gender of their children while they were still in the womb

When did this become a thing? I was pregnant in 1989/90. I don't think anyone knew then. I don't recall anyone at ante- natal classes talking about what they were having.

I had an amniocentesis test and was asked if I wanted to be told my baby's sex. I didn't want to know and didn't know until my son was born.

CecilyP · 04/02/2017 12:31

It's really the nothing but pink for girls that is the recent trend. And the gendering of things that would previously done for both - prams, pushchairs, little bicycles, roller skates. Its a way of selling more products in an affluent society as parents with boys and girl don't feel they can pass them down. More recently I have been pleased to see some lovely girls clothes in many other colours - nice to have a choice!

CecilyP · 04/02/2017 12:39

DS was born in 86 and I didn't know - I don't think scans were very sophisticated then. I had a couple of friends at the time who, because of their age, had amniocentesis, and they did know. This would also have been in their medical notes. But the majority of mum wouldn't have known.

LumelaMme · 04/02/2017 15:46

The other main reason, Paoletti theorizes, is because mothers who grew up wearing gender-neutral clothes and playing with toys that appealed to both boys and girls wanted their daughters to be able to revel in pink, lace, long hair, and Barbies.
Wot? I certainly didn't. And anyway, there were plenty of very girly clothes available in the 60s and 70s - horrid scratchy lace party socks, white cardigans that showed every speck of dirt, frilly frocks galore. As well as shorts and t-shirts. As for toys, it wasn't just Lego and Dinky toys: there were dolls, toy china tea sets, toy prams, Wendy houses with flowers painted round the door (boys got wigwams).

So, with all respect, I think Paoletti is theorising bullshit.

LumelaMme · 04/02/2017 15:47

The prams, it's true, weren't usually pink, but boys didn't play with them...

BertrandRussell · 04/02/2017 15:53

There are no such things as unisex or gender neutral clothes. There are boys clothes that girls wear, and girl's clothes.

And the gendering of things like prays is a pure marketing ploy to ensure things can't be handed down. Z

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CecilyP · 04/02/2017 16:03

I dunno, the gaberdine mac of the 50's and 60s was pretty unisex!

BertrandRussell · 04/02/2017 16:06

No, the gabardine macs- well, at least every one I ever saw/wore- were definitely cut for boys.

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CecilyP · 04/02/2017 16:10

Are you sure? They looked the same to me!