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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be nervous about weight watchers meeting

25 replies

SunFinished · 31/01/2017 10:32

I know maybe not appropriate but need a big kick up the backside to get motivated.
I am obese and in my 30's. I will join the weight loss boards here for more talk but for now I wonder if you can give me any helpful advice. I signed up for WW 10 mins ago and I'm so nervous about going to a meeting, I know it's silly but I'm a bit shy and hate big group things really. I feel I'm a rubbish person (I think my weight makes me feel like this). I am so down on myself it affects my confidence but I have to do something and the doctor said weight loss groups are very effective. Any advice please?

OP posts:
harderandharder2breathe · 31/01/2017 10:35

Yanbu to feel nervous but don't worry, everyone is there for the same reason as you, if they judge you they're arseholes, but I don't expect they will

Well done for taking a positive step Flowers

SunFinished · 31/01/2017 11:24

Thanks I know that I won't be judged. For some reason I'm scared to show weakness and being a fatty makes me feel weak and out of control. I'm ashamed but I pretend it's not happening (that's denial rite)

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 31/01/2017 11:29

Everyone is there for the exact same reason as the first poster said, it's not a room full of skinny people. It's a room full over weight people who have weight problems and want to lose weight. Just like you. Just go.

As for denial, sweetie, people can see your over weight, pretending won't change that fact. However you're not weak or out of control, just making bad food choices and need some support to change that, just like everyone else at the meeting. Stop worrying, going is a positive thing to do.

SunFinished · 31/01/2017 17:24

yes your right.
What makes me nervous is that I hate going into groups where it's established and everyone knows each other and I have to try and fit in. I'm so shy in those situations
Any tips for what to expect ?

OP posts:
pishedoff · 31/01/2017 17:46

I know it's hard but walk in with your head high, today could be the start of something brilliant ( I normally hate sayings like that!)

I joined up a couple of weeks ago, I've started with 2 of my best friends - anyone you could rope along?- and I'm so proud of myself! The first week I lost loads but ate brilliantly, last week not so good but my circumstances fit the week didn't help!! I feel really positive like this is it, I can do this!!

And so can you. Believe in yourself

Good luck xx

VivDeering · 31/01/2017 17:46

What are some of your beliefs around "groups where it's established and everyone knows each other and I have to try and fit in"?

How do you know it's an established group? Isn't it more likely that there'll be other new and new-ish people?

Even if there are a few regular members, why do you have to try to fit in? Can't you just get to know others and be yourself?

pishedoff · 31/01/2017 17:49

P.s tips....

You walk in, fill in a form, speak to the leader about what your goal is ( keep that realistic!), get weighed, ours has a small shop - I like it as I have a sweet tooth and they have some nice bits there- then go and pay. Once everyone is weighed there is a meeting, normally with the leader giving out certificates, inspirational chat etc. You can leave before that, it's totally up to you!

Lima1 · 31/01/2017 17:58

You are most definitely not weak. You are taking control of your weight and your life and that's very strong and brave - fair play to you.
I would imagine that in January they have lots of newbies joining so I'd say there will be people there not yet in established groups and I would also imagine a group like this is very welcoming to newbies.
Worst case scenario no one talks to you - very unlikely. Most likely scenario you meet people in the same situation as you who need support and are willing to give it to others. You will be grand - go for it!

Lima1 · 31/01/2017 18:00

Think of two good things about yourself and keep repeating them like a mantra over and over - you sound lovely and I'm sure you have a lot to offer.

Champagneformyrealfriends · 31/01/2017 18:01

I go to my WW class on a Tuesday too. You'll be absolutely fine-they're really welcoming and I really enjoy the class. You can say as much or as little as you like really. It's always daunting joining a new group but everyone was new once. Flowers

WTAFF · 31/01/2017 18:06

Do they shout your weight out in front of everyone? Blush I don't think I could cope with that!

millionsofpeaches · 31/01/2017 18:13

Of course they don't WTAFF!

The only time it's mentioned is when you get an award like 10% body weight lost or something, but they never say your current weight.

They don't go round the group and discuss your loss or not either which is something they do at slimming world. Found that quite off putting.

OP there will be loads of new people at this time of year. I rejoined two weeks ago after a break due to change in working days so couldn't go to my old meeting and everyone was very friendly. Honestly you won't feel out of place.

Good luck

KinkyAfro · 31/01/2017 18:17

I went back to meetings last Thursday and it was fine, couple of cliquey groups but still plenty of people to talk to. Get the app, lots of support on connect

harderandharder2breathe · 31/01/2017 18:18

January is probably the best time to start for it to not be full of long time members

SunFinished · 31/01/2017 19:12

Ok I will go despite being nervous as I've got to do it this time. I'm sure it will be fine but I've never done anything like this. In response to a PP I guess I'm just a bit shy in big groups and I'm basing this on going to toddler groups which I find a little soul destroying at times with all the cliques and me too awkward to speak cos I don't know what to say!

OP posts:
TheCatsMother99 · 31/01/2017 21:47

Not weight watchers but slimming world for me and I was so nervous when I joined but it was all for nothing. My group was fantastic and I was made to feel welcome and deliberately sat next to someone who was lovely and put me at ease.

I absolutely loved going and only stopped when I got to my goal weight but I actually really miss going now.

Hope it went/goes well.

HelsBels5000 · 31/01/2017 21:50

The point is that every single person who has walked through those doors for the first time has felt the same way that you are feeling right now. Therefore when a new member joins, they remember how they felt and are so welcoming and kind and non-judgemental.
VERY different to baby & toddler groups.

ETanny · 31/01/2017 21:59

Don't be scared, it's the best thing I ever did.
I felt sick to my stomach the first meeting I went to 4.5yrs ago. I had a lot to loose and felt like I'd never be able to do it and over the course of 3yrs I lost just under 10st.
I am currently chipping away at some regained weight from when I broke my back after an accident and Christmas and in the 4wks I've been back on plan I've lost 21lbs already.

My best advice is don't look at the ultimate end goal, break it down into more obtainable goals like working towards the first 7lb loss as it doesn't feel so scary that way.

Good luck with your journey :)

mrswarthog · 31/01/2017 22:07

WW gold member here - I lost 5 stone in 12 months and have kept it off for two years now. Nobody will judge you, it's a great way to make new friends and every single person knows how you feel and want you and them to feel better. Focus on small goals, stay for meetings & enjoy the craic.

SunFinished · 01/02/2017 05:52

Thanks for your advice everyone, feeling hopeful now. Good idea to think of 7lbs goal first then bit more etc. I hate being fat and Itell about time i did something for me about it!

OP posts:
VivDeering · 01/02/2017 17:32

When's your first meeting OP?

KenDoddsDadsDog · 01/02/2017 17:41

Don't be nervous , I was last year and it's fine . Some weeks are really good fun and it is good for motivation to face the scales .

SunFinished · 01/02/2017 19:14

Well I've done 2 days so far and feeling good. Kept within my allowance (a few questions to ask the meeting leader) the first meeting I'm going to is saturday. I feel better about it now reading these replies.

OP posts:
KenDoddsDadsDog · 07/02/2017 06:57

Come over to the WW thread Sun !

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