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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Stop DH buying dvd

19 replies

Mybrainishurtingme · 23/01/2017 01:14

DH just had his birthday but awaiting gift from family member (who has been unwell, hence delay in receiving gift)

Hubby has decided to buy the latest series of something he loves on DVD tomorrow but I know he has been bought it as a present (on my suggestion as I know how much he loves it) and I don't know how to talk him out of it, especially as he has got me in to it too so knows I am keen to see it too

AIBU to ask how to stop him buying it without
A, coming across all weird/avoiding shop/having some sort of meltdown to distract him from buying it
B, just telling him/spoiling the surprise

OP posts:
Original poster
Mybrainishurtingme · 23/01/2017 01:15

Ah crap, realised I used the dreaded "Hubby", I apologise Blush

OP posts:
MommaGee · 23/01/2017 01:19

Any idea when he'll actually get it?

MommaGee · 23/01/2017 01:20

Is he spending birthday money on it? Of not can you do the seriously you just had l these presents and now you're wasting money on more stuff?? Entitled much??? guilt trip?

gentlydoesit89 · 23/01/2017 01:24

No real advice I'm afraid- something similar happened before Christmas when my DP wanted to ask his dad for something (expensive) I'd helped his mum get imported from the US.
In the end, when I'd tried 'no it's too expensive', 'your dad will have plans already' and other various BS, I ended up just sort of yelling 'for gods sake just don't!' Grin

scottishdiem · 23/01/2017 01:30

I can understand some reticence if it were a child but you are all adults surely? DH can wait and act surprised/still be grateful cant he if you tell him? He will understand in the circumstances (adults dont need to be that surprised at birthdays surely?).

GirlOverboard · 23/01/2017 01:31

You could tell him you've just ordered it yourself from Amazon. I know that kind of spoils the surprise as he'll be expecting the DVD anyway (albeit from you rather than his family member). But it's better than ending up with two of the same thing.

BoomBoomsCousin · 23/01/2017 01:45

I'm not sure I really see the dilemma. Does he really, really love surprises? Would he actually be upset to find out what it is in advance of receiving it?

I wouldn't make up some grouchy excuse for him to not buy it. Even if he likes surprises, isn't it better to "spoil" that than to make him feel a bit miserable so he can be surprised?

Italiangreyhound · 23/01/2017 01:47

Tell him you will order it for him, leave it to you.

If all else fails just tell him. Surprises are overrated.

What is it???

GardenGeek · 23/01/2017 01:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 23/01/2017 01:52

"I can't tell you why, but don't buy it tomorrow. Just wait a day or two. No, I can't tell you why. Just trust me, don't buy it yet."

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 23/01/2017 01:52

Oooh Italian's is much better than mine. Do that one OP.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 23/01/2017 01:53

BTW YABU for still buying DVDs Grin

MrsBlennerhassett · 23/01/2017 01:55

omg i feel your pain. The christmas before last i had saved and bought DH an incredibly expensive piece of equipment for his hobby. He won some money just before Christmas and was so happy that he could finally buy the piece of kit he had been missing.
I went for the guilt trip of 'you have a young child now and that money needs to help with looking after him and paying our bills so we can all have a nice christmas'
It worked but the problem then was he was really sulky and resentful and when he finally did open the present on Christmas day he realised what a twat hed been to me and i think the guilt eclipsed any actual enjoyment of the gift.
So i think in retrospect its best just to tell the truth in these situations!!!

Original poster
Mybrainishurtingme · 23/01/2017 01:59

Thanks all, thb it's me who likes surprises, he's not bothered either way!
He'll be getting the present next weekend, ironically enough he picked up the book that is the other half of his pressie the other day as well!

As for still buying DVDs, we are one of those horrifying couples who don't have sky/virgin/tivo etc, and don't have broadband in the house, so books and dvd are our not so guilty pleasures (especially pretty hardback books that smell like olden days Grin)

OP posts:
7SunshineSeven7 · 23/01/2017 02:07

HeartsTrumpDiamonds You reminded me of this Grin

mirokarikovo · 23/01/2017 03:11

Now in our family we all have a general policy that we just don't buy anything for ourselves between about a month before our birthday (or Christmas) and when we've received all the gifts we might reasonably suppose likely. Dh regularly gets a cheque from a relative and always waits till he knows there's no more parcels to come before spending it.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 23/01/2017 03:37

7Sunshine that is hilarious, I love Southpark Grin

EmeraldScorn · 23/01/2017 04:10

Tell him you've seen an advert for whatever shop it's from and it's going on sale next Saturday and he can buy it then when it's 30% off. By that stage he will hopefully have received the one bought as a gift!

londonrach · 23/01/2017 04:37

No advice op had to reply re the still buying dvds. We another one who is. I like something physical. For your money. I buy dvds, cds and dont do any sky, virgin etc. Theres alot of us about. Mn and fb as far as i go and i dont twitter. Courses for horses. I find it strange you wouldnt buy dvds. 😚

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