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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WIBU to say that choirs full of people who can't sing (Rock Choir) are awful?

433 replies

PleasantPheasant · 21/01/2017 22:06

Honestly? I love singing, I think everyone should sing, and sing in groups - it's great. But why all the performances, crap choreography, shitty leaders who also can't sing and are presumably failed musicians. Why can't the ladies (and men) - very few of which can actually sing or understand rhythm, harmony, pitch... - just do it for fun and leave it at that? Why do they think they're amazing singers and their performances are great. From what I've seen they are largely outside, with shit backing music, crap acoustics making the whole thing even worse. AIBU?

OP posts:
MrsHathaway · 22/01/2017 17:07

Thinking about this a bit more, the other problem I have is that musicians work really hard to develop their skills, spending years taking lessons, practicing, rehearsing, then someone who has no investment joins a choir fot a few weeks and wants the same kudos, the same appreciation as someone who's worked very hard for years.

Be fair: that's an X Factor problem, not a choir problem.

ShelaghTurner · 22/01/2017 17:14

Where did anyone say they wanted the same kudos as a trained musician or singer? With that attitude no one should do anything unless they have a string of qualifications to their name Hmm

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe · 22/01/2017 17:22

YABU - I am a middle aged woman who sings in a rock choir. There are two sorts of choirs, one where you don't pay but have to be really good and the other ones, where your not very good and have to pay (like Rock Choir)

Me and my fellow singers sing for fun. We aren't murdering anyone, we aren't sleeping with anyone's husbands, We aren't sat at home hunched over the Tinder App. We''re singing. Because we enjoy it. That's all.

Pilgit · 22/01/2017 17:23

Have to admit (donning a hard hat here) that I find choirs singing rock songs mostly rather cringy. I can appreciate the skill and effort and applaud it but inside I hate it. Singing is great and choirs are great - there is so much wonderful choral music out there why do the have to sing pappy arrangements of rock tunes?

RhodaBull · 22/01/2017 17:41

Interesting thread.

I asked dh, who hates rock choirs with a passion, exactly why he hated them. Is it the naff music (yes), the fact they're full of middle-aged women (yes) and, as an extension of that, are all middle-aged women naff (no). He echoed earlier posters by saying it's the performing that hits a bad nerve. Just going along and having fun, no problem, but the matching t-shirts, the "I believe in myself" stuff and so on, is cringey.

I would also add that dh's friend went along to a rock choir thing. He's not exactly hunk of the year, but he does have a deep voice! Anyway, he said it was awful as the women (it was all women) were very unwelcoming and he shuffled into a place and was told, "No, Barbara always stands there." He went a few times then cut his losses. He said he's never felt so awkward. Plus he hates Queen.

StevieK · 22/01/2017 17:59

I was a member of Rock Choir in Bath for over five years. The only reason I left was because I became a dad again and I decided to put my family first. Yes, we know we aren't professional. Yes, we know we aren't the best. But we try our very best, when we do public performances, to put on a professional show for our audience. We never charge for appearing in public and have raised masses of money for good causes. Both local and national charities have benefitted from the joy of our music.
Oh, and by the way, in that time I was lucky enough to perform at the NEC, Wembley Arena and the O2!!
Not many people can say that (unless they are in Rock Choir!!)

StrangeLookingParasite · 22/01/2017 18:28

StrangeLookingParasite you actually thought about it and then came up with that load of rubbish?

Well aren't you delightful.

cherrycokehead · 22/01/2017 18:45
Grin
cherrycokehead · 22/01/2017 18:46

It is complete rubbish though

KurriKurri · 22/01/2017 19:08

He's not exactly hunk of the year, but he does have a deep voice! Anyway, he said it was awful as the women (it was all women) were very unwelcoming and he shuffled into a place and was told, "No, Barbara always stands there."

Not saying that your friend wasn't made to feel unwelcome - obviously it's really a shame if he was willing but discouraged because most choirs are crying out for men - but to be fair people do tend to stand in a certain place in choirs in their appropriate voice section. Although it sounds as if it could have been worded in a friendlier manner.

To answer another point, my DD (who is a professional pianist, so years of training) plays piano for various local choirs ranging from kids choirs to choral groups, to amateur but enthusiastic. She doesn't consider it an insult to her training that people want to have a go at singing even though untrained - she's there to help them and guide them through the music, set the pace. cover for mistakes etc.

All of the adult choirs she works with would have welcomed your friend RhodaBull they are always advertising for more basses and baritones.
And sometimes the choirs sound less good than they could because as people have said it is mostly women who take part, and the majority of them are likely to be sopranos, so you don;t get a balance of voices. In the charity choir I sang in, in was all sopranos and only three of us altos trying to make ourselves heard. But you work with what you've got.

SkaterGrrrrl · 22/01/2017 20:07

Wow, attacking people for their hobbies, very classy OP.

No singing, what next, no dancing and no laughing? Hmm

Sallystyle · 22/01/2017 20:16

I am going to sing at Wembley soon.

Can't wait Grin

herewecomeawassailing · 22/01/2017 20:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

whatsthecomingoverthehill · 22/01/2017 20:46

Rock Choir does seem rather expensive. I understand what someone said earlier about the organisation involved etc but that is almost part of community choirs, that people get involved and invest their time and energy. Otherwise it just feels a bit like a consumerist attitude, that you are just buying the experience. And whilst they make a thing out of raising money for charity it is very much a company who are wanting to make money out of it. There is a tension there (for me) that I don't like.

I also know of quite a few choirs that are just run for themselves and sound equally bad but I don't have an issue with them.

StrangeLookingParasite · 22/01/2017 21:21

It is complete rubbish though

In your very ignorant opinion.

StrangeLookingParasite · 22/01/2017 21:22

What an utterly weird comment, laden with straw men.

Really. How does that work.

Rooiboscz · 22/01/2017 22:30

StrangeLooking, why presume it's an "ignorant" opinion?

To those suggesting that I should simply decline the offer of a ticket, it's not as easy as that. There are five of us who have attended our friends' concerts and none of us wants to go again. We can't all just say "No", because we'd be blatantly rejecting them. We've all said that we'd happily donate to any charity, but the shows in theatres (!) are appalling. There's only so much smiling, clapping, cheering and faux emotion we can put on.

I do an art class, another friend does yoga and pilates, someone else does mindfulness something or other, and another is very crafty (sewing, making decorations, etc) We wouldn't dream of putting on public shows. We benefit immensely from our hobbies and don't need to involve other people outside of immediate family with them.

Come on - thirty odd people in matching clobber, singing songs from Les Mis and Take That very badly, with vim, vigour a shed-load of vanity, backing tracks and synchronised hand movements is really not a good night out for any audience. Oh, and the soloists...

Sallystyle · 22/01/2017 22:48

To those suggesting that I should simply decline the offer of a ticket, it's not as easy as that. There are five of us who have attended our friends' concerts and none of us wants to go again. We can't all just say "No", because we'd be blatantly rejecting them.

Again, that is not RC's problem.

I have enough self-awareness to know that my friends probably don't want to watch me so I wait for them to ask to come along. My friend watched me once because she asked. I have never invited her along to any events myself though. I know that it is not everyone's cup of tea.

I find it very odd that you think we shouldn't perform publicly because you have people in your life who invite you when you don't want to go.

I will tell my RC that we should no longer perform because some people might not be able to tell their friends they don't really enjoy watching them Grin

You clearly don't enjoy it, but you are wrong when you say that other people don't enjoy it. They do. We always manage to get a good crowd of shoppers who stop to listen to us who could just as easily carry on shopping if they wish. Some people simply enjoy watching others have fun. We are never short of a crowd singing along with us and having fun.

Sallystyle · 22/01/2017 22:50

then someone who has no investment joins a choir fot a few weeks and wants the same kudos, the same appreciation as someone who's worked very hard for years.

Grin Grin

What are you talking about? I don't know one member who wants or expects the same appreciation as a professional performer.

lbsjob87 · 22/01/2017 23:02

YABU, yes. If you don't like it, don't go. To call the leaders "shitty" is completely uncalled for, they are professional musicians and have worked very hard to be so.
What musical background are you coming from, to be able to judge others so expertly?
I don't get why someone would get so vitriolic about something that others enjoy.
Incidentally, I have a childhood friend who is a classically trained singer and is in a local "amateur" choir (but one that charges £15 a head for concerts and has a leader and three of its 15 or so members making a full time living from music, and others like my friend who gets paid to sing at weddings and so on). Not amateur in my book, but that is what they call themselves. You have to audition to get in in front of the rest of the choir.
I went to one of her concerts - not only was it really boring (OK, so NOW I know what a madrigal is....) but the acoustics were shot to shit and half the choir had lyrics on various bits of paper, which was untidy to look at. Two and a half hours and £15 I will never get back.
She thinks I loved it, every time since I've had something else on.
RC makes lots of people happy. Those it doesn't, fine, find something else instead.

glitterazi · 22/01/2017 23:56

This has actually inspired me to join one of these choirs, it sounds great fun

Me too, but unfortunately there aren't any near enough to me Sad

glitterazi · 23/01/2017 00:00

I am going to sing at Wembley soon.

Can't wait

Excellent. Have fun Smile

StrangeLookingParasite · 23/01/2017 00:00

why presume it's an "ignorant" opinion?

Because she was calling what I wrote a load of rubbish. It's her opinion, and I think it's ignorant, that's why.

PantyLiner · 23/01/2017 00:12

Is it only Rock Choir you have a problem with OP or is it choirs in general? I have children who are members of choirs. They are brilliant (but I am speaking as a mum) and the choirs have provided them with fantastic experiences! Why shouldn't someone join a choir for uplifting, positive experiences?? Both my children can sing btw but FFS choirs are a way of making new friends and are seen as social events. It sounds like your life is all hunky dory and you haven't yet felt the need to expand your social horizons. Well good for you OP, good for you clap...clap....clap

MrsTrentReznor · 23/01/2017 00:17

The problem I have with it at Wembley, is that I am there for the rugby. RC take up a hell of a lot of room, and when they are not singing, they are bored so start Mexican waves, mill about, bugger off home during play etc.
On the rugby forums it's apparent that it's not wanted.

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