Husband refusing to sit in economy class

[waterfallrainbow]

We are desperate for some winter sun. But DH (who doesn't care about winter sun) has imposed some conditions: He will only fly for up to 3 hours in an economy seat because he says any longer will damage his knees. He is 6 foot 3.5 with very long legs. Trouble is, you can't really get any winter sun within 3 hours. I can't help thinking he's being a bit precious. In the end we've shelled out an extra £1k for him to fly business class while we go cattle class, which basically means I am paying for his flight. I have long legs too... We have to go on a cheaper holiday as a result. Slightly struggling with my attitude...

Extra leg room exit row seats have plenty more room than premium economy. Usually about £60 each way pre bookable. They require good mobility passengers though.

My DH is 6'2 and has had repeated surgery on his legs to strip his veins out as the valves in his knees don't work very well. He suffers from awful restless legs (that's a whole thread in itself) and I was really worried when we flew to NYC a few years ago that he'd be desperately uncomfortable. He didn't complain once and was fine. We were delayed taking off on the way so were sat in our seats for a good 9 hours.

YABU as you had the option to find winter sun within (or just a fraction over) the 3 hour rule. So your choices weren't pay for business class or no holiday.

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered, are you medically qualified to say what will damage his knees? I can assure you a long flight with little room causes me pain for days and I am 5"4'. Medical problems are possibly a bit more complicated that you realise. When I have been sitting with restricted leg room I will get terrible pains, I don't mean they hurt or they ache I get pains like electric shocks and have been known to call out as the pain is random and unexpected. It will stop me sleeping and a holiday with me in agony and sleep deprived isn't fun for me or my loved ones.

I'm not sure what the big deal is, sounds like you can afford it, it will make DH enjoy the holiday more and your son is 12 so assuming not too difficult to look after?

Going to Petra was one of my best days in 2016, I went with my Dad and he flew business and I flew economy, extra legroom. He offered to pay for BC but I refused as I didn't need it, whereas he has a knee problem and hates flying economy-up to him how he spends his money I was just happy to go! I agree it's a shame they don't offer PE on that route. I have family there so we go regularly. The family that live there often fly with Emirates so economy is better comfort.

Well if your idea of winter sun is 14 degrees you could have gone to southern Spain or Morocco so no need for an upgrade.

Totally unreasonable. My DH is 6'5 and we've flown to Australia (12hr + 12 hr long haul flights + 2hr internal flight + 4hr drive at the end) in economy with baby, and he never complained.

He sounds like a right knob. My son is 6 ft 3 and manages to fly in economy. He pays for extra leg room if he can get it. Other wise he just gets up and down a lot.

A long haul flight, squished into a tiny space, doesn't sound very appealing if you are 6ft 3in. Don't know as I'd have shelled out a lot of money for business class though.

Fuck him. Why are you being such a doormat, it's not the 1950's.

I think your DH IBU to whinge about being squashed, I'm yet another with a 6'3 DH who has sat in economy on many long, long flights without complaint. Ok he doesn't love it but he sits in an aisle seat and stretches out when he can and accepts it's the price for a lovely far flung destination. He wouldn't dream of suggesting business class (even though we could afford it these days, he'd just see it as a waste for a few hours).

However I also think YABU to insist on a holiday your DH doesn't want to go on (sorry if I've got this wrong, HRTFT). If you're not willing to compromise by delaying or going by yourself, then he's entitled to say I will only do this holiday you want if X.

If you haven't yet booked, have you considered Oman?

I have a credit card that gets me airmiles every time I use it which can be used for upgrades to business class. I use it for absolutely everything so it soon mounts up. Sometimes they do offers where you get 30,000 miles when you first open it and sales when you get double miles on the card for a certain time period.

Would something similar be possible for your DH?

It does mean sticking with a particular airline though.

6'2'' here and always pay for the extra leg room seats. Off to Rome in a couple of weeks and its cost £14 each way on British airways. Think it was a similar extra cost on Thomson when we went 4 hours to Cyprus last year. Well worth it. So yes he is being unreasonable to insist on Business Class but you could have looked at the extra leg room seats elsewhere on the plane.

I have some sympathy with your DH but think he's overdoing a bit. He could just say he really doesn't want to fly economy and what are the options to to rather than doing the whole "I will damage my knees" thing. We've just considered South Africa in economy or Oman in business (BA sale doing brilliant offers to Oman but not to SA). We went for Oman in business. Can't argue that we'd really suffer in economy but it's not much fun on an overnight flight if you've got an option to do something else. Plus in Oman i got a really good deal on the hotel so the whole holiday was half the price of the SA one, despite the economy/business class thing.

But I'd love to go to Jordan too, I'm sure it will be lovely!

Problem is, that those extra leg room seats go pretty fast! I'm not extraordinarily tall, at 5'8" and neither is my 6'2'' tall husband, but we both of us find flying economy for any longer than 3 hours an uncomfortable nightmare. When our children were young, we always travelled economy when we went to Spain for our winter breaks (and there are quite a few places in the mediterranean where the weather is reasonably good at this time of year) as our budget just couldn't stretch to PE or Fc. Now that our children are grown, funnily enough, we regularly have to make long haul trips to the Caribbean (I know, what an awful imposition, but someone has to do it!) which invariably means an 8-9 hour flight, scrunched up in a tiny seat with our knees to our chins....I decided last year, NO MORE, and if it is at all possible I opt for Premium Economy or, especially at night on the inbound flight, for First Class, where I can be assured of a decent sleep on a flat bed, with duvets, pillows and all the other trappings of FC service......in my view, PE only offers a little extra room, an extra baggage allowance, a glass of champagne but that's about it, and often the cost is a lot more than economy but not much less than FC, so whenever possible it's FC for me. I'm aware that this isn't an option for a lot of people, especially for families and/or on low wages, but there are ways of getting relatively inexpensive PE or FC seats if you know how to go about it...I never go via the travel agents or the websites but I pick up the phone and call the airline and ask about any special discounts or fares and often they do have some available...I seize every opportunity to add to airmiles as well...on one occasion last year I flew FC to Jamaica for under a grand...I have to say though that husband and I generally travel separately at different times and make our own bookings...he is far more tolerant of discomfort than I am, and will opt for economy, whereas my aging self just can't do it anymore..

Shorter flight, then a cruise is the answer :-)

It's not just that the average height has increased, but that the average size and pitch of airline seats in economy class have decreased...which makes it economy air travel hard for those of us who are above average heights, especially when we have knee problems, as I do...

I would still say though that if husband isn't really interested in a winter sun holiday, then you should let him stay home, or go on a holiday more to his liking, and you could go with a friend or other family member - I hear that you both see it as a time for some family bonding, but maybe you could both think of other means of forging stronger family bonds at home ..

I'm 5.3 and I feel uncomfortable in economy these days. They pack those seats in! Hubby 6.2 and it's clear he can't fit his legs in. I insist he upgrades but he often feels bad doing it by himself so doesn't - I have to make him!
So sorry no idea why you begrudge your hubby leg room considering how tall he is.

*If he already has knee problems then it is pointless listening to people who say their husband is fine. If their husbands don't have dodgy knees it isn't comparable. I have dodgy knees and at 5'4" I find flights painful and if a flight was more than a couple of hours I would need more space or the holiday would be ruined as I would be in agony for days.

Lucky people with good knees.*

Agree with this. I am 5'4 and have bad knees. Some,types of knee arthritis are actually known as 'theatre knee' because they are so much worsened by sitting cramped up for a hour or so. I suppose it depends on how much pain you expect him to put up with, now you have mentioned he has knee problems. I think you are doing the right thing accepting he needs the space. For me at my height, probably at least half the holiday I would be in massively worse pain or reliant on sticks to walk after that kind of flight. To be honest I think it is quite unfair that those with this kind of disability have to pay so much more and perhaps be unable to travel. Everyone finds it uncomfortable, but those who are basically in good nick have no idea how much more than that happens for people with physical problems.

My fella is 6'6 and we just pay the extra for emergency exit seats. I don't think he's being precious. Long flights are awful for tall people but business class sounds like a total result for him while you're stuck back in cattle class.
Enjoy the holiday anyway xx

If you can afford it I don't see the problem. He can relieve you for a couple of hours and you can have a rest.

As for people with partners who fly 10 hrs plus in economy with work- they are working for the wrong company! I don't go unless it is business class and if they don't like it they can find someone else to do it. Who flies 15 hrs on business in economy?

My DH is a foot taller than me but pretty much the same height as me sitting down as the extra height is all leg. Watching him sit down in a Ryanair seat is quite shocking as his knees are jammed up against the seat in front. It looks very uncomfortable. Someone with longer legs wouldn't be able to fit at all. I wouldn't expect my DH to fly economy over 3 hours.

who flies 15 hrs on business in economy?

Well, for a start, those people who work for not for profits or charities but who still need to travel for business reasons. You know, those people who work to try and make a difference in the world rather than maximise profits. I am proud to fly economy fornwork reasons rather than waste money on business class... and seeing as the vast majority of people on the earth today won't ever go on an aeroplane for business reasons, let alone a family holiday, I think I'd rather try and remain in as much of the real world as I can.

OP, I have read all the replies after mine and my reply still stands. He should suck it up and be thankful for the opportunity to go away and bond with his children. An accident of birth may have left him slightly taller than most, but an accident of birth has also meant he is not in some slum in south east Asia trying to feed his children rather than worrying about a flight being rather uncomfortable.

There are bulkhead seats which have more leg room. The row at the front has loads of room and exit rows in middle have a lot more. Can't sit kids there but he can specifically book the bulkhead seats and sit on his own? That's what my tall husband does. We cannot afford business class but still managed a trip to NZ and back no problem