AIBU to be so fed up and confused on pyjama issue

[mummyof2pr]

AIBU to be serverly annoyed with all the judgements on pyjama wearers?

Can someone explain to me what the big deal over wearing pyjamas is? I don't understand. I shower daily, I wash my clothes if they are used/unclean. When I get up I get dressed go about my day, come home and shower and put pyjama pants on until I get into bed. I take them off before bed as I only sleep in my underwear. If I don't have anything to do in the day I'll wake up and put the pyjama pants on because they are comfortable and warm. If I then realise I have to go out and make a run to the store I'll just go like this as I usually have my children (4m and 2y) with me and if not I'm trying to do the shop as fast as I can to get back to them as my DH is not the best with small children and often gets flustered. I am not choosing to wear them out of laziness, I choose to wear them out of comfort. They are clean, I am clean. Nothing inappropriate is exposed. So I don't understand how it is hurting anybody. I don't think it's fair to sit and judge people who chose to wear pyjamas and be comfortable and I don't understand why people are so offended by this?
I'm sure there are a few people that do wear them because they are lazy and slobbish but I don't think it's fair to judge all people that wear them this way.

I don't think the hoards of pyjama wearers in Iceland supermarket have mental health issues Epoxy. But don't let that stop you making up any old bollocks.

That's it. I'm investing in the most jazzy bright pj trousers I can find and wearing them to waitrose. Can't wait to see the middle class revellers fainting in the aisles

Ok I will bite. As I said on another thread, I don't give a shit if you wear your pyjamas to go shopping in, I'm not remotely offended. But yes I will,silently raise an eyebrow, judge you and wonder why you couldn't get dressed.

Because if you know there is a chance you need to go out, then put some day clothes on. Don't get washed and changed into your pyjamas. There is plenty of loungewear available that is comfy, warm and loose. Buy some.

As said , I'm wearing black leggings, grey marl vest and black long sleeve tee. No bra as the vest negates the need, if someone comes to the door I'm perfectly respectable, if I need to dash out, I shove a pair of knee high boots and a coat on and go. I don't need to change. No one judges me as lazy or slovenly, I take these clothes off at night and do not sleep in them. I'm very comfortable and warm. It's just as easy to put these on as pyjama bottoms.

I couldn't care less what other people wear in public in one respect, BUT I do think it is odd when they wear inappropriate clothing - stiletto heels in snow for instance. Another example is wearing what is considered night apparel in public. Why would you do it?

The social norm is to wear pyjamas at night or first thing in the morning at home with your own family round you (or on your own), not to the supermarket, not on the school run nor when inviting neighours round . People who don't understand this must lack social awareness because surely they must know that it is generally considered inappropriate or lazy or even chavvy (I apologise for using the "C" word but there is no other way round it).

"EpoxyResin

I feel pity for people who haven't got enough pride in their appearence to spend 2 minutes on their personal grooming to actually manage to dress themselves. If you can't manage that small task, you must be fucked.

What very sensitive language when it's clear you understand you're referring to individuals suffering mental health crises. Pity is a wonderful form of stigma. Well done you."

Are you now suggesting everyone who is out wearing pyjamas has mental health issues?

I think people often say pyjamas when they just mean clothes for lounging about in. I have a number of pairs of "lounge pants" from M&S, which just look like joggers, and that I wear round the house with jumpers. I don't sleep in them, but would say "I'm off to put my pyjamas on". (Currently I'm in grey "lounge pants", a stripy top and a long cardigan, with Uggs.)

I said an hour ago that your dress sene was the least of your problems but having seen your other AIBU post this weekend about your husband yelling at you www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2821585-Post-baby

I obviously wasn't wrong. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time

Jeez. That's a bit of a leap.

Why ask if we're still all wrong?

You are all wrong btw, but MN is an echo chamber of the middle classes and those who aspire to the middle classes, so you won't hear much different here. I'm fairly confident most normal, balanced folk in the UK don't give a shiny shit whether your trousers are chequed cotton lounge-pants or Fat Face pyjamas.

@phil I want to know WHY and HOW it effects. Using judgements doesn't answer that.

Are you now suggesting everyone who is out wearing pyjamas has mental health issues?

...clearly not.

tigerdriverII

I think people mean that:
i1.walesonline.co.uk/incoming/article12410656.ece/ALTERNATES/s1200/1.jpg

which is what started the original thread.

Agree chipped.

Yes, there will be cases of people with MH issues (but it is assumed that most will have some form of carer/family assistance).

The masses of 20-something's slouching round Tesco's, on their mobiles in Pjs are unlikely to be suffering MH.

Don't see the issue really. I don't wear pyjamas out except to go to the bin/post box, but I wear "lounge" trousers out often because they are more comfy than jeans.

I don't think the hoards of pyjama wearers in Iceland supermarket have mental health issues Epoxy

Patently not what I said, but don't let that stop you either.

I live in the US and it is far more acceptable to wear PJs in public.

But there are different styles of wearing PJS.

• late eve/night/you look sick - fine to be getting groceries or be at a pharmacy. Not so much going to the mall.
• teenagers - do it all the time, even for school.
• clean/ironed with obvious 'day time' things like brushed hair, clean teeth etc, Ok for going to a friends house or quick run for groceries.
• Messy hair, bad teeth, dirty, messy appearing PJs during the day if you're over 25 - get thee to Walmart to join the other drop-outs.

I remember when nobody would be seen dead wearing gym clothes (leggings, yoga pants, tracksuit bottoms) unless they were actually doing some kind of exercise. It was noticeable that Americans did wear this and Brits didn't.

OP - The UK is far more aware of these things and judgemental than the US. In the UK it's seen as akin to spitting in public - nice people just don't, but in the US it's just a relaxed way of dressing.

Well sorry mummy.
The issue is that actually you don't have pjs, you have what most people call lounge wear.

Pjs that are worn when you sleep, which is what pjs are for, shouldnt ne used outside the house. Because, TBH, I just don't want to being in my bed all the dirty stuff you can catch in the street. It's totally unhygienic.
In the same way, I don't imagine going around in clothes that I have been wearing for the last week and will wear that same night again.
And finally, most pjs are thin material, look very ill fitted anyway so why on earth would I want to be seen in those???

Fwiw, I'm not britsih either. But I still find that that you could go out in pjs.
And from having lived in ply other places, I would say that ost other countries abide by that same rule.....

That said, I have a neighbour who was always in her pyjamas and dressing gown, no matter what time of day, whenever I went there to get DD or would see her go outside to call her kids in, she was always in pyjamas and dressing gown. That looked chavvy to me (or whatever my local equivalent is)

But it's the judgements that people re making that explain the HOW and the WHY .....

@phil I want to know WHY and HOW it effects. Using judgements doesn't answer that.

It doesn't need to affect anyone directly for it to stand out as unusual and for people to draw silent conclusions based on prevailing social norms.

OP, I'm an immigrant too. I find it's a lot less stressful to go with prevailing social norms in my adopted country, rather than constantly railing against the locals about why they're wrong, and expecting them to do and see things my way.

Except for power points in bathrooms, where the British clearly have it completely wrong.

I choose when it's time for me to move on when posting on an open forum. Always amuses me when people post that. Like, what you gonna do if I don't?!

It's the fact it's in your lexicon as a useage that pisses me off: that you thought of it in the first place.

Now I'll move on.

............. I'm over here now!

They definitely have that wrong Jassy damn British and their powerless bathrooms.

Following on from Kate said, so this thread is actually about issues with the DH. Pyjamas are the least of your problems, so I'll leave you to it OP.

@themartian no it doesn't tell me how it harms them personally. It has no effect on anyone else whatsoever so why are they making such a fuss? Telling me what they think and making judgements isn't an answer.

I live in the US and it is far more acceptable to wear PJs in public

In some places it might be, and the US are huge, but it's not a nationally accepted behaviour at all!