To not let dd become a vegetarian

[hopefulclam]

She is 16 and adamant that she wants to stop eating meat. I do not think this is a good idea as she doesn't eat much veg but she says she will now. I don't know what to do, I would rather for her to wait until she is 18 and fully developed.

She does not eat cheese or drink much milk. She did say she would continue eating fish which she does love. I am concerned she wouldn't be getting enough protein. She isn't active, but she is tiny, only 5'2 and just over 6 stone.

What else can she eat? And do I have a say in it?

At 16, if she doesn't want to eat meat, there's no way you're going to make her. She still wants to eat fish, so is still likely to get plenty of protein if you educate yourself with her and help her to work on her adventurousness.

At 16 she is old enough to make that decision and be involved in the menu planning however in a shared house she needs to take some ownership of the changes needed in the household cooking. I'm a veggie since childhood, raised my own kids the same and so far as adults they have elected to stick with it.

It may be easiest for the family menu planning to do it in stages eg she keeps eating fish for a while, you have meatless mondays for the whole family and gradually increase the veggie meals for her whilst you get used to what combines well with the family. You don't need Quorn and other expensive meat subs but you might find them useful at times whilst adjusting.

One of my kids has a meat eating DP/DP family and highly recommends 'Part Time Vegetarian' for ideas for a combined menu: www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0146E4EW0

I would also echo the recommendation for general health check - she does seem very low on the weight to me and I've known a number of teenagers who confused 'going veggie' with 'weight loss diet'.

She is 16 for heavens sake, if she wants to make a choice on what she eats because of morals/ animal welfare/ whatever reasons then I'd applaud her. Vegetarianism can be very healthy, Do some research! It'll also be cheaper for you, and healthier if you join her in a few veggie meals a week and cut out some red meat.
Thinking you can only get protein from steaks is a bit old fashioned OP. Good luck, embrace the challenge.

DD2 was 14 when she said she wanted to be a vegetarian. It never occurred to me that I had the right to tell her no.

She will be 17 this week and is still veggie had a brief stint as pescatarian but it only lasted about 7 weeks, she would like to go vegan however I have said not until she is more involved with what food she is eating.

I have noticed this has happened in the last 4 months so I suspect the vegan thing may come one day.

To be honest it is not a big fuss to make her dinner. I do what I do for the rest of us. If I use mince then she gets split lentils instead, If other meats I use other things to get her protein .

Having read again regarding her low weight that is a concern. As for genetics that plays a very small part in weight. My family on one side are all very slim including my dd but not that slim, falls within the lower end of healthy weight. They THINK and claim they eat loads...they really don't!

How much do you and your dh and daughter ACTUALLY eat because I'm guessing it's not as much as you think. Are you certain you and dh have a healthy attitude to food?

Have you ever done a food diary INCLUDING accurate amounts?

I'm slightly (used to be more) overweight I used to really underestimate how much I was eating it's common.

Ever watched supersized v super skinny? Admittedly not great quality programming but interesting in the way of how much people THOUGHT they ate and how much they ACTUALLY ate and numerous studies (as I'm sure the poster with expertise in ED will back up) show this is extremely common.

If any of my children anounced they wished to become vegetarian I would be happy they were making a sacrifice based on their principles and would be happy to support them. Of course, it will be doing your DD a huge favour by making her contribute to meal planning and preparation but it sounds like you are on course there already. She does sound very slight though . I'd be keeping an eye on that too and if she suggested going vegan next I would be concerned.

I became a vegetarian at 12 and went back to eating fish around. I have not eaten meat for well over 30 thirty years. Back in the day it was so much tougher. There are vegetarian options on almost every menu these days, even monthly veggie cooking magazines. She will be fine

Assuming she can prepare her own meals, then YABU.

However, i have a massive 8yo fusspot. Its very daunting when you cook a family meal and have to make something else for one. 'Take it or leave it' isn't an option -- DS will happily not eat anything at all.

I would also be concerned about this being a sign of an eating disorder.

She will find eating out extremely difficult (although the fish might help). I was pescatarian for years and then developed ibs triggered by lactose. I ended up eating meat again because it was just so restrictive. Veggie dishes are often full of cheese and fish dishes in restaurants often have butter or cream based sauces.

She will find eating out extremely difficult

Not really. As others have said, it's a lot better than it used to be. Most menus have at least one option.
Some pubs don't have very inspiring choices, but as an adult it's easy to choose the pubs with menus you like, just like meat eaters do.
As a 16yo she might get dragged along with her parents, but OP could choose pubs/restaurants which match her daughter's requirements too.

You could suggest a couple of weeks trial period to see how it goes? Involve her in shopping and meal planning.

My dd has just gone pescetarian. She had a couple of kind of trial periods when she gave up meat for lent, last year and the year before. She likes cheese, which makes it easier. Veggie meals she has liked are - veggie curries and stir fry, stuffed peppers, spicy bean burgers, cauldron sausages, cauliflower cheese, veggie lasagne, pizza. We'll need to try and find some new recipes to expand the range of things she eats. I'll also want to find some ready meal options for when the rest of us want to eat meat. The other 3 of us are still eating meat, but probably less frequently.

I'm seconding QMf and would be alert to any other signs of controlled eating (not that vegetarianism, by itself, is a sign, just that it can be especially in combination with excluding other food groups).
But I think, even if you suspect this, she is old enough to be listened to and her food choices be respected. Just be vigilant and watch...don't trot out the 'But you won't get enough iron...etc...Most vegetarians have more than sufficient iron and are healthier than we carnivores.

Grammar as per my previous post my DF lived to 99 having no sign of any of the illnesses that beset meat eaters and taking no regular medication. His body just wore out. Obviously this doesn't guarantee all veggies a long life but it does show it is possible.