To not let dd become a vegetarian

[hopefulclam]

She is 16 and adamant that she wants to stop eating meat. I do not think this is a good idea as she doesn't eat much veg but she says she will now. I don't know what to do, I would rather for her to wait until she is 18 and fully developed.

She does not eat cheese or drink much milk. She did say she would continue eating fish which she does love. I am concerned she wouldn't be getting enough protein. She isn't active, but she is tiny, only 5'2 and just over 6 stone.

What else can she eat? And do I have a say in it?

[itsallbollocks]

A diet of fish and vegetables is probably one of the healthiest diets going. Cutting out meat and dairy isn't going to do her any harm, if she eats plenty of fish, vegetables, fruit and carbs. It's her choice at 16 years old, so just be as supportive as possible. Maybe you could try some new recipes and cook together, it could ultimately be very good for your relationship with her. If you disapprove, she will likely just eat what she wants any way, and it could potentially be damaging to your relationship with her.

[JinnanTonik]

I have been a vegetarian all my life (I'm NOT tiny or frail and used to be an athlete before an accident fucked my leg!) my children, now both adults are both veggies and are both strapping six footers! DH is not a veg head but tends to choose the veggie option 9/10 times and he will have what I eat unless he wants meat when I cook two meals, although he actually said once when offered a 'free sample' of a chicken something or other, 'No thank you I'm a vegetarian!'

[MrsJayy]

I was vegitarian from 15 till i was pregnant with dd. I dont think you can stop her she is a near adult you can have a say in what you cook though

[DJBaggySmalls]

There are limits to how many servings of sea fish you can eat every week as the mercury levels are so high.
If she will eat fish she is being a hypocrite.

[hopefulclam]

Thank you all for your support and advice. Of course I couldn't force feed her, I was just wondering if there was anything I could do to change her mind. Luckily for me, she already helps with meal planning and like to cook, so we will both be learning how to cook new veggie meals together. Thank you aforestgrewandgrew and itsbetterthanabox, that gives me more hope for her health.

Her reasons are that she is a huge animal fan and hates death in anyway at all, she says she feels bad and sick when thinking about animals. When I asked about fish, she thinks she wouldn't get enough vitamins or protein without it. And yes she says she is a Pescitarian.

On the other hand, her weight is down to genetics as both DH and I are both underweight despite eating healthily and a lot. I doubt DD has an eating disorder as she considers herself a "foodie" and eats a lot more than DH and I. She also is confident about her body image, after having low confidence issues for many years. But thank you for your concern and of course I will be keeping a very close eye on it.

[scampimom]

A bad diet is unhealthy - whether that includes meat or fish or neither. A good diet supports health - whether that includes meat or fish or neither.

[MrsJayy]

I dont think it does a teen girl any harm to pop a multivit every day she could do that till she gets her new way of eating sorted and of course meat substitutes gives you a bit of protein too.

[lizzieoak]

Djbaggy, that attitude really grinds my gears. People make the steps they are ready to take and judging the speed of those steps does not make it easier for them. I've been vegetarian for 28 years and have never preached at people (am now practically vegan). I do, however, post positive messages about farm sanctuaries and the line to fb & meat-eating grinds watch them & many have told me they've cut down because of it, and one is now only eating fish.

If people stop at pescetarian on the way to vegetarian, fine. If they always eat fish, just think of the mammals and birds they are saving!

Op, she'd be plenty healthy w/o fish, but if she wants to keep eating fish, then that's a choice too.

If you're on Pinterest, check out veggie pins. I made a great roasted veg w lentils for me and ds to take to school/work for lunch today. Gave him some bread too as he's a teenager so needs more calories than I do.

[lizzieoak]

Woops, damn autocorrect. Should be "meat-eating friends" below, not meat-eating grinds!

[pointythings]

DD1 was 15 1/2 when she decided to become a vegetarian. She doesn't eat fish but will eat cheese and eggs. I've just adapted our menus, do vegi versions of what we're having - really easy to do and it means I get to eat lentils and chickpeas and stuff too. Which I love, but DH can't tolerate them. She eats a healthy diet and supplements with iron and vitamins. She reads labels on everything and won't eat standard Haribos, for example. At 16 you can't assume this is a fad.

[DesolateWaist]

She will get plenty of vitamins and protein without fish.

DH and I are vegetarians but tend to lean towards being vegan, I try to stay vegan for 3 days a week roughly.

DH is a very healthy weight and very tall. I am a fat fuck.

[waitressinacocktailbar]

YABU. Eating a veggie diet is far healthier if you eat the right foods. There are so many veggie pages on fB etc with plenty of info on re. this.

[TheCatsMother99]

At 16 I think she's old enough to decide and be responsible for her choice of becoming a pescatarian. Shes a young adult and should be treated as such.

[user1483046088]

| fallenempires Tue 03-Jan-17 01:15:33
Had this earlier last year with teen DD,we fully supported her & tried to include veggie alternatives into our usual meal plan(always includes meat/fish or smaller quantities of)tried to show her how to batch cook for the basics etc, and made alot of basics for her.But no it turned out to be a fad & we discovered that despite her beliefs that she was eating meat or meat products elsewhere & gradually started helping herself to meat at home, left with a freezer of home made veggie meals & Quorn mince!We are open to others' food choices but at this age unless the teen is willing to properly embrace it and start learning & actively cooking balanced meals for themselves then it's not fair on others.I have & have always had a one meal(cooked from scratch) policy & I won't shift on that!

this is she's paying for the extra food that you otherwise would not be buying eg she has a job and she is cooking a balanced diet and not just eating chips then fair enough if not then she eats what she what's in the house

We wouldn't be buying quorn when veggie crap it would add to our food bill also or ds can't cook and dosent eat hardly any veg or fruit

[Ipsie]

What a different work we live in to when I was 16! No way my mum would have been thinking she could control what I eat like this. At 16 they can leave home, get a job, get married and have children. I'd left home and got a job at that age! Maybe treat her like the adult she pretty much is and discuss with her how to manage this new stage in her life. Lots of suggestions above how to manage a vegetarian lifestyle.

[user1483046088]

At 16 I think she's old enough to decide and be responsible for her choice of becoming a pescatarian. Shes

adults pay for there own shopping and cook there own food I highly doubt she is doing either

[Maxwellthecat]

I think once you transition to seeing the meat on your plate as dead animals rather than food then it's very distressing to be made to eat it.
There's no need to 'change her mind' she can have a perfectly healthy diet without meat, it's only a very very recent thing that people ate meat every day anyway and most studies show that the western diet is far too high in protein, she'll be getting it from fish, bread, lentils, pretty much all food has some protein in it. I'm vegan and I hit my protein target every day without trying.
I think the more you fight this the more distressing it will be and the more she'll dog her heels in. Imagine if someone was trying to get you to eat dog or cat and that's how it feels for a veggie being faced with meat.

[user1483046088]

As in life if I am relying on others to pick up the tab be distressing as it is I would have to suck

My ds 16 regularly eats Diffrent dinners to the rest of us tonight he is having nandoes however he has a job and is paying for it himself he would not be demanding a Diffrent diet that is not due to medical needs on our dime

He's welcome to eat with us but if he wants somthing that I don't normally buy as the family shoo then HE has to foot the bill
16 year olds are often very entitled and you have no idea if op can bore the extra coast to her food shop

Your effectilvy buying two Diffrent meals 3 x a day for one person

[MuppetsChristmasCarol]

Yabu.

I went veggie at 7 and I'm a very healthy adult - not sure what effect you think it'll have on her development!

On the other hand, she's not veggie if she eats fish and at 16 can figure out her own meals etc.

[vj32]

I went veggie at 14, my Mum complained about it a lot, but allowed it so long as I took a daily multivitamin. I remember having wanted to go veggie for several years by that point, I can picture a particular meal that made me really uncomfortable when I must have been under 12.

I very briefly ate fish at uni because I thought I couldn't be healthy without it, but it didn't last. (I was eating a very poor diet but that was nothing to do with being veggie!)

As others have said, its relatively easy to adapt things now with Quorn and other veggie alternatives being available in every supermarket.

It may be worth discussing with her how far she wants to go - I am strict in that I won't eat anything with gelatine, check cheeses, don't wear leather shoes etc. I have to admit to not checking the wine though as I always forget that one. I also have soya milk and pre-pregnancy with DS1 was using soya spread as well. If she doesn't like dairy then there are alternatives that you can get.

[harshbuttrue1980]

When I was 12 I found out about slaughterhouses through doing an animal rights debate in the school debating society. The thought of eating meat made me feel physically sick, but my mum at first tried to stop me from going veggie. Her resistance didn't last long, as I just refused to eat the meat on my plate and lost weight so she gave in. 24 years on, I'm now a vegan. Be pleased that your daughter is making a choice for herself, and don't dismiss it as a fad.

[Grammar]

I'm seconding QMf and would be alert to any other signs of controlled eating (not that vegetarianism, by itself, is a sign, just that it can be especially in combination with excluding other food groups).
But I think, even if you suspect this, she is old enough to be listened to and her food choices be respected. Just be vigilant and watch...don't trot out the 'But you won't get enough iron...etc...Most vegetarians have more than sufficient iron and are healthier than we carnivores.

[TheCatsMother99]

user1483 , at 16 I had a part time job, as did a lot of my friends. So IMO it's not all that unlikely this person's daughter has a way to fund, or can find a way to fund, her own shopping when she doesn't want to eat meat or has to subsidise it with other options.

So my point stands about her being old enough to make her own choice about what food she eats.

[m0therofdragons]

It's up to her what she eats? Will she be buying and making it?

I told my mum I wanted to be veggie at 14, she said she couldn't cook a third meal (df has seperate needs re food so she already did family meal and adapted version for him). I saw her point and didn't push the subject - I was being an awkward teen having a phase rather than real conviction. I respect my dm's opinion and the extra work it would create.
Having said that, dd1 is far more interested in veg and not keen on meat. I would support her if she chose to be veggie but I feel I do have a right to a say in the food I provide dc. I would not support her being vegan while I was her main meal provider - this is my choice and my right as much her right to have a teen whim.

[pointythings]

Quorn and meat subsitutes are pricy, but you can do without those - and lentils, chickpeas and so on are actually much cheaper than meat.
DD1 does not eat much Quorn, she prefers the pulses and there are lots of tasty things to make with them. And as I eat it too, most of the time, it makes no difference to the family food budget.