Children playing war...

[LittleRobinRed]

So I've two boys (3&5) and they often want to engage in boisterous play, rough and tumbling etc, we encourage and support this within appropriate boundaries.If they are play fighting with things etc they usually play with dragons, knights, goblins etc but it is all fantasy play. Friends children 2, 4, & 7 play very 'real' war - children have armies that represent turkey, russia, germany, syria etc. they blow up terrorists and terrorists blow them up (in the play way!). I have a real problem with my children playing in this way with so many conflicts going on in the world and I have a real problem with turning this into a game for sport and fun. It just sits really uncomfortably with me and makes me question what we are teaching our children about the wider world and almost mocks these horrendous issues. I want to talk to friend to say I don't want my children being encouraged to play in this way and when together can we focus on other games, but need to do it in such a way that does not cause offence?

The military do a lot of other things apart from defend the UK and invade other countries

Wait...why do I need to add trigger warnings to write tony blair's name?
Genuinely interested.
Do other politicians need them as well? Bush? Thatcher?

I must have gone really wrong I am a dairy intolerant peace loving vegetarian
Nothing went wrong there. But if your and my children stay where you were in your childhood, what's the point of our parenting then?

God knows 1horatio

Unless we were actually in the war in Iraq how are we so traumatised by it

'They are not. But their job is to defend UK. NOT invade and act like politicians' robots.'

They have to take orders from their superiors. That is part of their job, too. And this includes taking them from government officials who make it policy to carry out armed action. You don't get to pick and choose. 'Oh, I don't fancy going to Gibraltar, can I be stationed in Kent instead? Thta's not how it works. They sign up for it. If they don't they can be court martialed depending on the situation. It has been necessary to defend the UK's interests from abroad for a long time, too. Again, this is why forces were created. Plenty of people serve in the Forces who played all kinds of games as children.

Crowdblundering
Yes and I back that. I have myself worked in an army base once. In extreme weather conditions too. But for a cause that was entirely charitable.

Bush?

Try him for war crimes

Thatcher?

The Falklands War was legal

expat
Yes I totally understand that. that is why I am saying it is time to challenge that

I used to play war games when I was little.... I think people misunderstand 'play', and view it through adult eyes.

'Sorry expat but if that's all you have to say in response to my long post, pls don't say much. But thanks for the attempt hmm'

You do not get to dictate to me or anyone else how we should post or even respond to you. Thanks for the attempt to police me. Your long post came across as largely ridiculous to me, IMO, so I responded to you erroneous assertion that people are not allowed to use TONY BLAIR's name on MN without a trigger warning - that might be true but if so then it applies to title only according to Talk Guidelines.

But again, continue your sorry attempts to be patronising and play mod games.

My children and the other children on the street play a chasing/tagging cops&robbers game but they call it "terrorist". We haven't said anything but it did feel odd.

I do see you point, as "holocaust" would be a game name/theme we might object to.

But I don't think your children will really be acting out the details of the Syrian conflict:it's too complicated for me to understand and I'm an adult!

Fwiw, I don't think objections with achieve anything.

"My issue isn't the idea of exploring war, fighting, etc in play - it is the 'realism' of it all, these are real things happening in the real world. I think that is the bit I'm feeling uncomfortable with, not he idea of toy guns, boisterous play etc - terrorists being used in play etc - that's what I find uncomfortable - playing syria war whilst reading whats happening in Aleppo etc."

But if your and my children stay where you were in your childhood, what's the point of our parenting then?

Children DONT stay at the same point in childhood though. That's the entire fucking point of childhood - to learn about the world, process knowledge and grow up. Hence why we're adults and the vast majority of us aren't violent terrorists....

valentine think that's pretty disingenuous and insulting to Iraq veterans and anyone who lost someone in that conflict tbh

Is the Tony Blair "trigger" thing a joke?

was ready to pass you a grip of pearls but yanbu, playing at war with goddies and baddies is one thing but what you describe doesnt sit right. my kids have no idea that there is trouble in those countries let alone talk about terrorists etc.

and im pretty liberal!

'that is why I am saying it is time to challenge that'

Knock yourself out! Join up and when you receive orders tell your CO you'd rather sing Kumbaya. See how far it gets you. You have a very naive and rather ignorant idea of how armed forces work, the roles they carry out and how and why they were formed.

My brother was obsessed with war as a child and the most gentle soul now, a wonderful father and does still do strategy games plus a keen interest in military history. So, a history and politics geek not a dangerous nutcase!
Goodies and Baddies play amongst children is a natural way of ordering and understanding the world around them. I'd guess those other children listen (passively) to the news. It's normal and quite healthy. There has been research although I can't remember the specifics.

No crowd. I think it's time we honoured the soldiers we lost and the millions of lives affected in those countries. We need to now make sure that our children learn that war/terrorism/guns are absolutely no game whatsoever.
I really like the point raised about holocaust: I can never imagine to allow my children to play any theme around that.
And for all those saying Blair'a name is allowed, of course it's allowed!!! After all aren't we the nation that elected that war monger to power TWICE and are still not bothered that he walks free despite destroying Iraq, leading to Syria crisis and the lives of the parents/families of hundreds of British soldiers who can't grieve for them properly while he is free and not accountable (alongwith other responsible people too of course).

an am i missing something with the tony blair trigger thing?

lovelearning

I asked about trigger warnings, not about war crimes...

I'm fairly certain that the average 3 yo in the U.K. sees suicide bombers the same way he'd see Voldemort or the wicked witch of the west.

Playing war games that include Syiria or Palestine and Israel may seem more realistic to us, but to a young child?

I would mostly be concerned about the 'goodies' and 'baddies'. If it was all a bit CS Lewis and all the baddies were brown skinned beardy types and the clean shaven, flaxen haired ones were the goodies I'd be very concerned about the subliminal messages. If not I'd leave them to it.

buggerit

I'm not sure either. Shrug.

I grew up in and out of care so parental involvement very thin on the ground

To every one taking names of Israel/Palestine/Syria, would you allow them to play Holocaust theme too? After all it's just a word and they will learn when they grow up, won't they????

If children are engaged in violent role play then does it really matter what names are given to the goodies and baddies. Whether it's the knight, dragon and princess; or Churchill, Hitler and the Jews, it's basically the same thing with different names attached. Clearly it would be insensitive to let you children play the latter whilst attending a Bar Mitzah, but i don't really see the difference between the too... or maybe we should ban pre-schoolers pretending to be pirates - walking the plank really is an inhumane form of execution!