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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think cards with the recipient named on the front are common?

348 replies

AddToBasket · 20/12/2016 20:56

Class issue alert: inflammatory if you are bothered by that sort of thing

I was told that cards with 'To my wife/Grandad/Auntie' on the front were considered a bit non-U.

AIBU to go on thinking they're still a dead giveaway of background? Or are they OK?

OP posts:
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5
crumpetsforteaa · 20/12/2016 23:36

But I don't mind them from parents because that's different and I don't know why.

CaraAspen · 20/12/2016 23:37

"1horatio

These class threads are so amusing...

I'm not English, but DH is, and he's one of the most vulgar people I've ever met... and yet he works for a university. So... he's apparently an intelligent but vulgar and chavvy (?) cunt... or something.

He'd probably send a vulgar Christmas card to the whole family!!"

And yet "he works for a university"? Depends very much in what he does "for" them and it depends very much on the quality of the university...

crumpetsforteaa · 20/12/2016 23:39

I'm a snob though and I hide the flimsy cheap ones, they're far more offensive that the named ones.

EstelleRoberts · 20/12/2016 23:40

YABU to use the term 'common', or waste your time worrying about such things. Life becomes much easier once you stop caring how people might judge you. You become a much nicer person for others to be around once you stop judging them.

glueandstick · 20/12/2016 23:42

If you hang them on string they are high enough up that you can't see what's on them at all really Grin

1horatio · 20/12/2016 23:43

cara he's a lecturer.

But yes, he happens to be quite vulgar.

Doesn't mean he isn't good at what he does... but he isn't as polite as some people would expect (stereotype) and English man to be.

And yes, he'd love to use the choire boy Christmas card or something similar.

As for the quality... I'm certainly not going to tell you their ranking (=where DH works).

crumpetsforteaa · 20/12/2016 23:45

Being a lecturer doesn't mean you're posh though does it?

tangerino · 20/12/2016 23:46

I don't actually like receiving cards at all, how unreasonable is that? I think they look really scrappy and only put them up out of a sense of duty.

1horatio · 20/12/2016 23:48

crumpet

I called him a vulgar 'chav' (ok, he may not be a chav, but you get what I mean), so, I certainly didn't call him 'posh'.

MeetMeAtMidnight · 20/12/2016 23:54

I guess people have to do whatever makes them feel better about themselves but when it gets to the level of determining that a certain type of Christmas card is 'common' - yes, right up there with blue or coloured lights on the list of things of things we can judge the people around us on - I'm laughing at you not with you. Come on now. Seriously, stop it.

CaraAspen · 20/12/2016 23:56

Some are suggesting people might choose not to buy the tacky type of card being discussed because they know they are tacky - although in actual fact they like them.
In fact I have always hated that type of card. Genuinely. Ugh

Bibs2014 · 20/12/2016 23:57

Never heard this before! I love giving and receiving named cards.

PhilODox · 21/12/2016 00:00

No-one uses "glass" for mirror nowadays, absolutely no-one. Even my father (and he's in his 80s), and he's from a frightfully smart family. Probably the Duchess of Devonshire was the last to do so, and she died in 2014.

QuackDuckQuack · 21/12/2016 00:01

Does this only count for Christmas cards? I buy named birthday cards if there's one I like or manage to find one with the right variant of grandparent name. But I walk past the racks of named Christmas cards in Tesco and wonder who buys them. I've never sent or received one and people who do must spend a fortune on them. I suspect that being in Tesco while wondering this probably makes me non-U anyway.

The huge range of named cards reminds me of this Fry and Laurie sketch.

CaraAspen · 21/12/2016 00:02

I used to like National Gallery cards best featuring a nativity scene. I happen to love art anyway. Now I stick to charity ones. This year the Shelter cards were "naice" and they got my support.

CaraAspen · 21/12/2016 00:04

I used to like National Gallery cards, featuring a nativity scene, best. I happen to love art anyway. Now I stick to charity ones. This year the Shelter cards were "naice" - as some of you would say - and they got my support.

1horatio · 21/12/2016 00:04

We use (as mentioned above) animal charity ones.

But I'd like to use one of the more 'vulgar cards' next year, tbh.

CaraAspen · 21/12/2016 00:05

I never buy names cards at all. Ever.

CaraAspen · 21/12/2016 00:05

...named...

MeetMeAtMidnight · 21/12/2016 00:06

Cara, I get that but there's a difference between personal taste, in cards as in everything else, and dubbing people and things 'common' in the looking down your nose sense because they have different populist tastes.

Kel1234 · 21/12/2016 00:10

I'm not sure exactly what you mean?
Are you saying cards that say "to named recipient" common?
If so then not at all. I hate cards that are not specific

CaraAspen · 21/12/2016 00:11

MeetMeAtMidnight:

I don't dub people common. I think cards like those described are a bit tacky, however, even though they can be quite expensive and quite large in size. But yes, it is unacceptable to label people as common or under-class or chav. Not nice.

Ohsofat · 21/12/2016 00:12

Some people need to get a life, I never even realised it was an issue, now I know will it change which cards I buy, will it fuck.

kittymamma · 21/12/2016 00:15

Ah dam it... I've been outed!

Yesterday I posted two cards for each of the following pairs of people (One from DH and I, the other from the kids):

My maternal grandparents (Found the only great grandparents card in the shop!)
My parents
My brother and sister-in-law (YEAH I FOUND THAT TOO!)
My sister and fiance (Didn't find that - went for "special couple")

Never used to, and actually, these are the only cards I send (I have made it clear at work that I don't see the point in them and people have stopped sending them to me or expecting one), however, after my DD was born my sister begged me to send her one with Auntie on it, and I didn't want anyone to feel left out... It just kind of continued...

NotWeavingButDarning · 21/12/2016 00:17

I loathe them but have never even considered that they might be a class issue Confused. I just think they're horrid. Tastes vary, that's all.