Have been NC with her for over a year (serious mental health issues as a result of her narcissism when growing up ) complicated as she lives very close and dcs/ dh still see her every few days.
Last year dh and dcs cooked at hers and I joined them all to eat. It was really stressful for me and this year I just don't want to put myself through that, I want peace and quiet at home with dh and the dcs
They cannot see why I won't go and I am beginning to feel selfish and spoiling their day by telling them to go and I will have late lunch with them