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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I'm not am I?! (Christmas one sorry, and it's long)

122 replies

lastqueenofscotland · 19/12/2016 20:11

This year we are doing Christmas at my sisters, which is a small cottage in a remote location (highlands of Scotland remote).
We usually end up with a few waifs and strays and have ended up with more than usual. So we have Booked cabs for those from a nearby town to go home in the evening and those from other remote villages who will struggle if they have been drinking to get home can stay.

One of the people coming is from the town, and is a friend of my sisters and is an Aussie who can't get come for Christmas, she lives nearby my mums brother. Excellent.
Also nearby is a girl me and my sister went to school with, who has sort of guilt tripped us into having her, she has family to spend it with but she had a minor argument with one of them 89472 years ago so doesn't want to see them... Initially she asked me if she could come and I said id need to speak to my sister it's her house etc, she got cross saying we'd invited som random Aussie but not her, an old friend etc. My sister said sod it for the sake of keeping the peace well have her.

However she is continuing to be difficult, I was going to pick up her, my uncle and the other girl from the town where they all live at noon after my uncle would have been to church.
She has turned round and said well she is going out on Xmas eve and might not be awake By then and maybe wants to see her family so she'll let me know on the day when I can come and get her. Hmm and we can have dinner when she gets there... More Hmm

Then there was the kick off when she couldn't stay... There is a cab booked and paid for and literally NO room in the house. Again apparently it's unfair Hmm

AIBU to say she's getting picked up at noon. We are having dinner when we are having dinner and no she really can't stay there is NO ROOM.

She's 30odd ffs Xmas Angry

OP posts:
rollonthesummer · 19/12/2016 21:46

I bet you that when you arrive to get her, she'll be hungover, not yet dressed and will be a cow to you all day!!

ChuckSnowballs · 19/12/2016 21:47

If you are intent on picking her up at 12, tell her to come and be at the war memorial for 12, don't make the error of going round her house, she will just faff about.

Other pick up stops are probably available.

PickAChew · 19/12/2016 21:48

Good grief, YANBU! She sounds like a spoilt princess.

If she wants feeding, she needs to get her arse out of bed! Else, she needs to make other plans.

KnittedBlanketHoles · 19/12/2016 21:55

I don't imagine she'll behave, so I would withdraw the invite.

ProseccoMadeMeDoIt · 19/12/2016 21:58

Hmmmmm, wonder why she fell out with her own family Wink

JenniferYellowHat1980 · 19/12/2016 22:01

Won't it just piss you off to spend the day in her company after all this? I would cancel her.

Nocabbageinmyeye · 19/12/2016 22:06

I'm only here to find out what she texts back, she sounds like she has the potential to be entertaining (for me not you 😉)

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 19/12/2016 22:16

Currently no reply I'm afraid cabbage

OP posts:
Gooseysgirl · 19/12/2016 23:45

Wow!!! Cheeky mare...

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 19/12/2016 23:51

Sounds good. But agree you shouldn't pick up from her house. She won't be ready and will expect you to wait.

cookiefiend · 20/12/2016 00:10

she will make you wait- and it will make you angry. So be really strict about it and have some reason you need to get back. She could always pay for her own taxi to you if she is desperate. She sounds awful.

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 20/12/2016 00:15

How sure are you that she'll get in gbd cab home?

ohfourfoxache · 20/12/2016 00:16

I know it's the season of goodwill and all, but some people take the fucking piss Angry

Italiangreyhound · 20/12/2016 00:30

lastqueenofscotland she is your sister's friend, if she is rude, so be it. Do not stress or let it bother you. You are a guest and can practice your walking away if someone is rude to you.

pictish · 20/12/2016 00:32

I agree with Cookie - she will make you wait. I also agree that you must have a reason to be moving swiftly and to stick to it...otherwise you'll end up feeling furious.
Compound your point by telling her if she isn't able for 12 then she's welcome to make her own transport arrangements as you won't have time to spare. Remind her it's your Christmas day too.

haveacupoftea · 20/12/2016 00:34

I doubt she will reply at all, it sounds like she has no intention of coming.

MrsBlennerhassett · 20/12/2016 00:43

YANBU tell her straight whats happening and then its her choice to join in or not. Dont let her guilt you into doing things differently to accomodate her.

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 20/12/2016 00:58

^
THIS! with bells on....

I would definitely another location for collection so she can't have you waiting while she combs the cat/counts her socks...

With the rider... I will be there @12...i won't wait longer than 12.05...of you are not at my sister's by 2 under your own steam we shall assume you've made alternative arrangement and give your dinner to the dog..

we are already being very generous hosting yule... It's our holiday too..

ChishandFips33 · 20/12/2016 01:06

Agree to not going to her house - cheeky cow!

And be prepared for her to try and manipulate and control throughout the day - if she's not ready don't wait for her - it will be a blessing in disguise shame but she's an adult after all

OzzieFem · 20/12/2016 01:34

she has family to spend it with but she had a minor argument with one of them 89472 years ago so doesn't want to see them...

...and maybe wants to see her family so she'll let me know on the day when I can come and get her.

Hasn't she just contraindicated the reason she wanted to come to your sisters place for Xmas in the first place with these words? As other pp have mentioned she sounds like she is going to be a drama llama for the entire day. Why subject yourself and others to this me, me, me, person?

aquashiv · 20/12/2016 01:40

You lost me at the second paragraph. Why exactly are you guilty?

RebootYourEngine · 20/12/2016 04:14

Cheeky cow she is.

I would do as a previous poster has suggested and tell her you will pick her up from somewhere other than her home. Tell her if she isnt there on time then you wont wait for her.

toastyarmadillo · 20/12/2016 04:24

Placemat king for the reply, I would totally uninvited the cheeky bint!

girlelephant · 20/12/2016 04:37

Hopefully no reply as she's looking into ruining someone else's Christmas! She sounds horrid Confused

EnglishNotBingo · 20/12/2016 04:49

She sounds very much like a friend of mine too!

I agree that you are right to lay down the boundaries now. My friend has never really been told, and she is 43 and still pulling this shit.

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