To be bored to death of 'babies' and kids?

[Skylett81]

I'm mid 30s and my kids are both teens now. I have no interest in babies or "toddler talk" and to be honest, never really have. Even when mine were little I didn't feel the need to discuss them constantly.
Unfortunately it seems that I just can't get away from babies or toddler talk. A few weeks ago a friend and I were planning a meet up (few drinks in a bar) and she suggested we meet another friend. This other friend is Muslim so won't go in a pub so we said "fine, coffee shop would be great". Then however this other friend said that as we were meeting in a coffee shop she may as well bring her DD (who is around 15 months old). First friend then decided that if that was the case, she may as well bring her DD (roughly same age). This meet has now turned into a quick meet in coffee shop and then on to the nearby park. Now I don't want to go! It's bad enough listening to them talk babies continuously through the working day, I can't be doing with it out if work too. I was looking forward to getting together with friends, not a toddler class.

Similar thing happened last week at work. We organised a Christmas buffet for lunch time. One colleague said she was off that day but would come in if she could bring her DS (3). Cue ... many more colleagues deciding they would bring their kids so in the end the Christmas buffet resembled a bleeding kids Christmas party with toddlers fingering the good, screeching, whining etc etc - I ended up hiding away in the office and catching up with paper work.

Latest episode - we have started to plan a get together over Christmas. Idea was that it would be adults, wine and 'nibbles' however, due to family interference it has now turned into a kids Christmas party which I'm expected to organise as all anyone is interested in is bringing kids and making sure they're entertained!!

AIBU to wish I could find some like minded souls that are not obsessed with kids and babies?? The only release I get is my martial arts class which is 99% men - none of who chat babies!!

YABU just because you don't seem to have mastered the adult art of saying no to plans that aren't suitable.

No one is obliged to like children but sitting there seething and resenting someone else's company because they dare to like being around their own kids or talking about them is frankly childish.

YANBU!

Yawn

This:

"...the noise and chaos and total child focus was not enjoyable..."

Often very much in evidence in public places too especially when large groups of mummies take over in a cafe. Grrrr

Yanbu. I have a toddler and a small baby and if by some miracle I manage to arrange something without them I sure as hell dont want anyone else's kids there and would probably cancel if I were pre warned about other children coming.

YA SO NOT BU

YANBU

But

1. you should learn to say "no I'd intended it as an adults event" rather than being walked over and then silently seething

and 2) be prepared to see less of your friends with small DC, if you don't want them brought along, especially if it's a daytime thing. Because not everyone has childcare on tap.

YANBU!

I just can't do it anymore. I literally can't think of the words to join the conversations about Calpol, coughs, poo, nappies - why are people talking about poo?? - sleeping patterns, tantrums, iPads (cringe), Paw Patrol... why does no one strike up a conversation about anything else? And I certainly don't, I'm worried I'll get a blank stare back.

I had a woman I've never even made eye contact with before approach me at the nursery gates last week and start barking at me demanding to know what school I'd applied to. I'd barely replied before she started monologuing about 'only putting one school down' and which schools she thought were 'rubbish'. I just stood in silence, I thought it was one of those prank TV show things and as soon as I replied someone would pop out and say "It's a Mumsnet Special edition of Punk'd!"

I sat waiting for the kids' Nativity to start and began eavesdropping a little at the conversations around me. Calpol (again.) Reflux. Coughs. Pampers. Home-schooling. Clarks versus Not Clarks.

I can't believe not one of them snaps and goes "Well, enough of that bollocks, who watched [tv show]/saw [movie], has been to [location]?"

I'm in three different classes/training courses that I attend in the evenings and it's brilliant - no one talks about kids. One group is male-dominated and we talk about the topic at hand, the other is childfree ladies or older ladies, no one feels a great need to talk about liquid shit and its rainbow colours, and the other is a random mix of people but no one has a great urge to suddenly start waxing lyrical about CBeebies. I don't talk about my kids, they don't talk about theirs - other than the normal in-passing remarks like "I went shopping with my children the other day, and I saw this event/thing/anecdote whereby..." and it's bliss.

But then Monday morning rolls around and it's back to "... well the arse rash looked a bit peculiar so we took some pictures then it had cleared up by teatime..."

YANBU OP.

Come on media. Publicise the issue. Encourage parents to pick a topic that is unrelated to their children's orificial expulsions or Calpol intake. ANYTHING!

YANBU! I have a toddler and one on the way and genuinely welcome child-free dos. We make a point of having one night out a month as a couple or with friends, no children involved.

I appreciate not everyone is as lucky as us (both sets of DPs nearby to babysit) but we were a couple before children, had interests and friends before children and although we love our DS dearly and can't imagine life without him, sometimes it's nice to have adult company and conversation that doesn't get interrupted every 2 minutes.

YANBU op, and whats with all the faux pearl clutching about op having teens in her 30's? I had my DD at 20, she is now nearly 17 and I am still in my thirties! As for the cafe thread being deleted, well, those of us who were on it know who caused that.

Its difficult to sometimes get childcare for those who have little ones, but its equally hard when you have almost reached the finish line with the hands on parenting and you want to move to a new phase of socialising, that doesnt involve snot, screeching and the general chaos that comes with babies and toddlers. I do think you should say to your friends that you dont mind the kids coming occasionally, but ask if you can all try and arrange a regular 'child free' evening/day maybe once a fortnight/month. If they know in advance, they can arrange a babysitter and everybody wins! Failing that, new friends.

Or OP, take them for coffee at the organic kitchen in buckhurst hill, where under fives are now banned! Happy days!

You do need new friends tbh

How about, your teens, babysit their tinies for money?

Shameless link to organic kitchen here.

www.facebook.com/theorganickitchenltd/