Aibu to be pissed at mil

[Smartiepuf]

I posted the other day about my mil taking over our specisl events with our lo - nipping in there with all the 'firsts', taking over at xmas, easter....you name it.

My mil has now booked a xmas experience xmas eve which is a good hours drive away and basically means my lo routine will be fucked - dinner time will be whilst out and they wont be going to bed until a good 2-3 hours after their bedtime.

Im pissed off as it was a xmas experience i wanted us to do - the 3 of us, but dismissed in the end because of the timing being so rubbish. Im annoyed as its been booked (we have been asked to pay though!) and as usual there is no consultation and she is taking over again!!!

My partner says iabu but i dont agree.

Thoughts?

I completely get why you don't want to go but I don't see why your MIL is getting all the blame when your DH agreed with her that she should book it? He is equally culpable, if not more so, as he should have discussed it with you and taken your wishes into account. You clearly don't like her but she is not totally to blame.

Honestly? I would tell your DH that if he keeps allowing his mother to ride roughshod over your marriage, ignoring what you want/said/need, what your toddler needs, and literally costing you money so she can look good to all her friends, your marriage isn't going to last long-term.

He's picking the wrong person to support. He is. And if he can't see it, he needs to open his eyes. You need to make a list of all the time/money/grief she has cost you when she's insisted on being extravagant with your time and money, in spite of what you have clearly said you didn't want and sit him down.

Your relationship, long term, requires you and DH to be on the same side with this. And right now, he's not there.

Thank you all

Ewe...you are so right!

Juli...she had booked it prior to speaking with my oh. She just sold it to him afterwards.

The landslide majority view here is that ianbu which confirms i am not going mental and it is actually her and not me.

She dislikes me because she is insecure and needy, and i only dislike her because of her shitty, sneaky and self-serving behaviour.

In truth, i could not give a mouldy rats ass whether she likes me - id rather not be liked by that sort of person. What pisses me off the most is the emotional guilt she puts on my oh to help her get away with essentially being a total twat.

Im definitely speaking to him. If he really wants to go despite the obvious pitfalls then i will agree to do it on the basis that we refuse the next thing thrown upon us and that we discuss anything else. If it was a gift it would still be shit but the fact is i am done with her spending OUR money on shit we dont want to do that will also cause us a tonne of grief.