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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed with doctor having a go at me about weight gain in pregnancy?

76 replies

lostoldlogin2 · 05/12/2016 19:15

I live in Spain. Here....when your are pregnant they weighed you at every single appointment.
I am now 32 weeks pregnant and have gained 15kg. I started at 164cm and 55kg and I now weigh just below 71kg fully dressed....at night time (after eating 2 full meals....relevant for me because my weight can fluctuate by up to 1kg between morning and afternoon)
I am active (walk between 5-7km a day) I have a 5 year old, I go to te gym once or twice a week and box (pads and bag only) and I live up 10 flights of stairs (no lift)
My blood pressure is 90/55.
I just feel like they have a chart that says "you must only gain x amount" and anything over that seems to spark a load of criticism. I was told that if I continue to "gain huge amounts of weight like this" it can cause complications in the pregnancy.
But.....I am only 3.5kg overweight for my height if I WASN'T pregnant and I am nearly 8 months gone.

I just dread going there and feel angry that they keep having a go at me. Written down it seems absurd to me.AIBU? What is the deal in the UK?

OP posts:
Pineappletastic · 05/12/2016 19:22

15kg is a lot. Pretty sure they would say something about that in the UK too. I get that if you were underweight before you aren't massively overweight now, but the sheer amount of calories you must be putting away to be gaining that amount while active could cause pregnancy complications.

However, everything is cost/benefit, so if you feel happy and healthy and you're not at risk for other reasons (or even if this isn't true, actually) it's really up to you, but HC professionals would be remiss if they didn't warn you of the dangers.

Areyoufree · 05/12/2016 19:28

My sister had the same problem, here in the UK. She started her pregnancy at a relatively low weight, so it did seem like she put a lot on. Plus, everyone gains weight differently. In both my pregnancies, I put on loads in the 1st trimester, some in the second, but very little in the 3rd. As you say, 71kg is not a lot to weigh at 32 weeks, and I bet you are one of those people who put on more because they start off so small. I agree that they probably have a chart that they go by, when really common sense would be better here!

Original poster
lostoldlogin2 · 05/12/2016 19:31

But I'm not eating a lot and that the thing. And I didn't in the the first pregnancy either. ....and it was the sAme shit that time too. I was 50kg again by the time my son was 7 months old....he was born at 3.9kg and healthy and is now a healthy 5 year old. I am....genuinely.....eating a totally normal diet.

OP posts:
sofato5miles · 05/12/2016 19:31

3 pregnancies. No1 13kg, No2 15kg, No3 17kgs!

3 healthy babies, but blood pressure issues with the 3rd. I am now back to pre baby weight ( cos of the staggering, ended up 23kgs heavier) and i say the destruction of skin and belly muscles is one i will always regret. I too, was active, and didn't eat gluttonously but bloated up. Lost about 6kgs in a week of each birth.

DailyMailCrap · 05/12/2016 19:37

If you're eating normally and exercising, then it Might be a sign of pre-gestational diabetes. Has this been excluded?

Original poster
lostoldlogin2 · 05/12/2016 19:40

I have been tested for gestational diabetes (they test everyone here) and I do not have it.

OP posts:
Original poster
lostoldlogin2 · 05/12/2016 19:41

And my blood pressure is low.....they also told me I need to watch that. They seriously told me that my blood pressure was too low and that I was at risk of high blood pressure. It's like they just read from a script and don't engage brain at all.

OP posts:
DailyMailCrap · 05/12/2016 19:48

Ah ok. Low bp in pregnancy Dilates blood vessels and can increase risk of blood clots, which is why GPs here recommend stockings. But they would have reviewed this already as part of their checks so are prob just covering their bases. It's annoying

JurassicFart · 05/12/2016 19:48

I know this isn't the point of your thread but ten flights of stairs?! You must have thighs of steel. How do you cope with schlepping baby/shopping/stuff up there??

15kg does sound like a lot with eight weeks to go, I would just keep an eye on it though, if everything else is okay.

SuzieQ99 · 05/12/2016 19:50

I wouldn't worry about it at all. It sounds like you have a really healthy lifestyle and know how to look after yourself so I wouldn't let it upset you. It would clearly be a different story if you were overweight to start with with high BP but that's not the case. A worry might be not losing it afterwards but you already know how to do that! If everything else is fine relax and enjoy your pregnancy. I cant recall how much I gained with mine. They aren't too bothered here in the UK from my experience, unless you are very overweight to start with.

Areyoufree · 05/12/2016 19:53

I don't think 15kg is a lot, when you consider your starting weight and height. Some people just gain more - charts are based on averages after all. If you are eating healthily, and there is no underlying medical reason for it, then I am not sure what they are expecting you to do!

HyacinthFuckit · 05/12/2016 19:53

I put on not much less in one of mine despite hardly managing to eat for much of it. No idea how. No GD. Lowish BP. BMI of about 26 on conception, so it wasn't like I was underweight before. Some of us just blow up when we're pregnant.

Bahhhhhumbug · 05/12/2016 19:55

But isn't that getting on for two and a half stone in 'old money' plus you have eight weeks to go if they still work on 40 weeks (sorry was a long time ago since l was pregnant they used to go from last period )l was always told shouldn't gain more
than a stone and a half.. I think you are being a little over defensive when they maybe are genuinely concerned for the welfare of you and your baby.

UterusUterusGhali · 05/12/2016 19:57

Does your BP normally run that low?

dementedpixie · 05/12/2016 19:59

I have read of the 123 rule in pregnancy.

If you are overweight aim to put on around 1 stone (6kg ish)
If you are normal weight aim for 2 stone (13kg)
If you are underweight aim for 3 stone (18kg)

we just don't get weighed much in pregnancy at all in the uk

DailyMailCrap · 05/12/2016 20:02

Advice has changed. I'm a bit overweight in terms of bmi (muscle not fat but makes no diff) and GP and Gaeno have said I shouldn't put on any weight. So I'd be on a maintenance diet plus 100 cals. But OP wasn't overweight so doesn't apply to her.

Original poster
lostoldlogin2 · 05/12/2016 20:05

Yes it is. But as I explained to them (spry for drip feed) all women in my family are small. We all pit on between 3 and 4 stone in pregnancy and lose it all immediately. None of us are over eaters......if anything the opposite would be true. It is I think 2 stone. I don't know. Maybe I am being defensive but it's weird knowing you have a BMI of 26 at 32 weeks and knowing you are way above average fitness and having someone have a go at you. It's exhausting

OP posts:
Lules · 05/12/2016 20:08

I put on more than that by the end of my pregnancy. No idea how as I couldn't stop throwing up. I had a massive bump though. No-one weighed me once I stopped losing once because of HG that I can remember so they can't have been that bothered.

PacificDogwod · 05/12/2016 20:10

It what way did the dr 'have a go"?

BMI is pretty irrelevant in advanced pregnancy.

Ignore and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.
In not such a long time you will lose vast amounts of weight quite suddenly.... Wink

Helspopje · 05/12/2016 20:11

Low bp can be an issue in pregnancy
I faint and fall over and mine isn't much lower than yours (also 32 weeks)
I've put on 13kg (preg 4). Noone has mentioned it but I was 1m76/74kg at the start so I think this is still within acceptable limits (admittedly upper end).
This has been a very different pregnancy for me as it has been the only one over gone into with a significant muscle mass (so heavier but smaller iyswim) and have continued to strength training throughout. Am hoping this means I will dump the weight more efficiently this time as I hung onto it ++ in previous pregnancies until I stopped breastfeeding when they were 2ish.

Andbabymakesthree · 05/12/2016 20:14

Can you decline weighing?

They weight you twice here. Booking in and 34wks. I've lost 4kg according to paperwork. 9kg since being pregnant and weighing myself at home on my scales.

I've only allowed weighing to prove a point to them - although last week I had my first little weight gain. Sickness finally abating - 36wks.

How do you feel in yourself? If you are fit and healthy try not to worry. If it's taking a toll then maybe time to cut back / reevaluate diet?

RB68 · 05/12/2016 20:15

its gestational diabetes and actually it would be weight loss that is an indicator of this in pregnancy. I don't think you are out of kilter, forget it and move on - I took alot of advice when I was pregnant with a pinch of salt even Drs, Yes that would be the Dr that thought an arse was a head...ending in an emcs

tooneedyme · 05/12/2016 20:15

You were very light before so needed to gain more. I'd be fuming but put it down to the fact they use one rule for all and most are overweight to begin with.

FreeButtonBee · 05/12/2016 20:17

I put on 5 stone with my twins and lost it all (and more) within 6months. Meh. I am just a big fat pregnant woman. I refused to stress about it. My blood pressure was perfect. And I wasn't anywhere near as active as you. I agree with them not engaging their brain. Maternal weight gain can be a factor but if everything else is absolutely fine then it's stupid for them to get hung up about it. I reckon a decent portion of it in some places is good old fashioned misogyny

Liara · 05/12/2016 20:17

My lovely mw who was following me in my pgs told me that although she was totally unconcerned about my overall weight she recommended me to weigh myself regularly as too fast a weight gain in one month could lead to complications in the pg.