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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think its never okay to get a dog whilst working full time?

120 replies

RentANDBills · 04/12/2016 10:04

I really want everyone to say I'm BU on this one, but I suspect not Sad

I have extreme dog broodiness, always have. Have had dogs before and I love them.

Problem is that I now work FT and very soon DP will too.

As much as I desperately need want a dog, I think its so unfair to get one knowing that they'll spend 8 hours or so Mon to Fri on their own.
We can't really afford to pay a dog walker (round here you'd be looking at £12 for an hour so that's at least £60 each week) and the nature of my job (Nanny) means I couldn't commit to coming home at lunchtimes to visit.

My ideal dog would be a medium or large breed too, not a small lap dog.

This is likely to stay our circumstance for at least 10 years.

Is there a loop hole? Or am I right in saying its not fair to get a dog when the house is empty Mon-Fri?

OP posts:
Florin · 04/12/2016 10:35

Personally I don't think doggy day care is the correct solution anyway. Dogs want to be with you not farmed out. I think it is a brilliant option for say a day or two a week or when you suddenly have a family commitment that the dog can't come to. However I don't think it is a good permenant solution. It is is also very expensive. Around here it is about £35 a day per dog.

SoupDragon · 04/12/2016 10:36

If you're near Croydon, you can borrow my spaniel any time you like!

But no, it's not OK to leave a dog home alone all day. I've done it perhaps once a year with SoupDogg but made sure he gets a good walk before and after and has access to the living room windowsill where he sits and watches the world go by.

Original poster
RentANDBills · 04/12/2016 10:36

I'm registered with BMD actually Smile I'm very introverted IRL though so not sure how well I'd cope with the human interaction that would involve!

OP posts:
Original poster
RentANDBills · 04/12/2016 10:39

We're in Chelsea, soup else I'd snap your hand off for that! LOVE spaniels. Which type?
Lots of pugs around here, and handbag dogs. And a surprising number of Collies, though I may just notice them because we used to have one.

OP posts:
MsGameandWatch · 04/12/2016 10:41

I think plenty of people do it and it works fine for them and their dog, they just won't admit it here.

Personally I think for an older dog who has someone come in and walk them half way through the day it's not a huge problem. I used to work with a women with two dogs who left them at home. She didn't feel bad because she said that every day or evening outing, holiday etc was geared round their dogs, they were never put in kennels for example. The only time they were alone was during the working day and for no longer than four hours at a time. I agreed with her.

I'm a carer and home ed my child so am able to be with my dog most the time. It's worked out well for us. But I can't get too excited about responsible and caring dog owners who have to work but ensure their dog has a walk half way through the working day.

albertcampionscat · 04/12/2016 10:41

There are cats who have to stay indoors for health reasons - FIV or blindness for example.

potap123 · 04/12/2016 10:43

It would be worth investigating whether any of the assistance dog charities have a centre local to you and need evening and weekend boarders. Eg guide dogs in training are often sent to live with boarders. You drop them off at the centre on your way to work and pick them up on your way home. You have them evening and weekends only so no need to worry about leaving them home alone in the day. Guide Dogs pay all their food and vet bills. The dogs will be very behaved. You'd tend to get the same dog for between 3 and 6 months at a time. Not quite the same as having your own of course but a good way of getting your doggy fix if your circumstances don't allow you to have your own.

Failing that contact your local guide dog mobility team and see if they have any guide dog owner who need help freerunning their guide dog.

GrapesAreMyJam · 04/12/2016 10:44

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

PaulDacresConscience · 04/12/2016 10:50

I just don't buy it that everyone who has a dog and works FT uses dog walkers and sitters. There are loads of dogs on my street and during the daytime the street is empty. In the mornings I see people driving off and then they don't reappear until 5:30 - 6 onwards. I work from home so I can see the difference in occupancy throughout the day. As a PP has said I suspect this is very commonplace, but people don't admit to it.

I think it depends on the breed and personality of the dog. My dogs are incredibly lazy. They get walked first thing and pee and poo. Then have been times when I have lost track of time and it's been 4 or 5 in the afternoon and they are still happily stretched out asleep - and I have to persuade them to get up and come for a walk! It's not as a result of thinking that they can't go out as I work in the same room as them and am on hand throughout the day.

Other dogs are very active and require a lot of exercise and stimulation.

AwkwardSquad · 04/12/2016 10:51

We are now on our fourth set of neighbors who have got a dog when they are frequently out of the house all day. I just don't get it. Surely people get dogs because they like dogs. Why get one to then neglect it?

Yes, the neighbours suffer, and it is fucking annoying I can tell you. But you know what's worse than the fact that it is a noise nuisance? It's the sound of the distress from a confused, lonely dog - a pack animal with no pack.

ragdoll700 · 04/12/2016 10:51

Its not fair if the dog will be on its own 5 days per week, but not right to say its never ok to get a dog while working full time some people have help like a friend of mine leaves their Lab into her parents and collects him in the evening so he is fed walked and well looked after during the day.

statetrooperstacey · 04/12/2016 10:51

Speak to a greyhound rejoining charity there are loads of them. They might be able to find u a pair. Greyhounds need 2 20 min walks a day and are very very lazy in the house, will sleep all day. If you ax plain your situation to them they might have an established couple ( for company) and might be happy to rehome to you. Just need to sort access for bathroom breaks then, dog flap ?
I wouldn't get a dog otherwise tho it's too long and boring a day for them alone. Cruel really, but 2 greyhounds might fit the bill.

CrystalVision · 04/12/2016 10:53

We have a dog and pay for three two hour group walks a week, I work from home one day and DH finishes at lunch another day. We definitely couldnt leave him all day, I'd feel so guilty.

So no, unless you can change your working hours or afford someone to look after/visit/walk it during the day, there is no loophole.

Orangebird69 · 04/12/2016 10:56

YANBU. It's selfish. And it's not just about how much exercise they do or don't get, it's also about the company. Dogs like you being around. It's not all about a quick walk or comfort break at lunchtime.

SoupDragon · 04/12/2016 10:58

He's a cocker spaniel. Adorable but a complete and utter nightmare :o

Serin · 04/12/2016 10:59

I only work 2 days a week but on those days our dog goes to an elderly lady who lives nearby.

Doggydaycare here is £18 a day, I knew there had to be a cheaper alternative so posted a printed flyer through the houses of the local council estate and old peoples bungalows. We stated that we could only pay £5 a day and still got 14 applicants.

Our dog really loves going to his "Grannies" she doesn't walk him far but he spends all day being talked to and having his ears stroked. She says that she spends all week looking forward to his visits as she couldn't have a dog otherwise.

ittybittyluna · 04/12/2016 11:00

RentANDBills I'm a nanny too and would love a dog (which isn't going to happen because we already have a cat and no garden). I work two nanny jobs and I know that both would allow me to bring a dog if I asked. I work with older children and neither family want the commitment of having a dog - so it would benefit us all. The only thing would be that the dog would need to be beautifully behaved as the potential for it to go sour once property is destroyed is fairly high!

Wolverbamptonwanderer · 04/12/2016 11:01

You could speak to a greyhound rescue. A lot of greyhounds have been kennelled and are used to being alone and sleep for very long periods, it's not a problem for them. However there are temperament issues and not all like to be alone so they'll need to find a match for you

SeaCabbage · 04/12/2016 11:01

thing is it's not just about the walks is it? It's the company.

Angelitron · 04/12/2016 11:03

I have a dog, I'm home all day, she follows me round as she likes company.

Very cruel to leave a dog all day, watch the documtary on the stress that dogs go through, it's very sad.

OP get a house bunny.

TheDropBear · 04/12/2016 11:04

Another charity you could look into volunteering for is The Cinnamon Trust. They arrange dog walkers for elderly people who can't walk their dogs anymore.

Wolverbamptonwanderer · 04/12/2016 11:04

I'm sorry I missed statetrooperstacey post which i just repeated! Smile

Olympiathequeen · 04/12/2016 11:06

Very unreasonable to leave a dog 8 hours a day.

harshbuttrue1980 · 04/12/2016 11:06

Its cruel. How on earth can any animal be expected to not wee or poo all day?? If you have a dog flap and garden, it might be OK. I don't hold with people saying its OK as dogs can be trained not to wee. They are probably desperate and trying so hard to hold on as they know they'll get shouted at or smacked if they pee on the floor. Dogs have needs and bodily functions, and if you aren't prepared to meet those needs, don't get a dog.

JustAnotherPoster00 · 04/12/2016 11:07

becca great post

Only on MN do dogs need constant company and stimulation. Hmm

YANBU it just depends on the breed and the personality of the dog OP

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