To fall out with my elderly grandmother?

[NoCapes]

My Nanna is 86 and over the last few years (since my mum has retired) has become more and more of an attention seeker
Faking illnesses, going to the doctors and A&E a lot and acting like she can't do things when people are around (yet being perfectly capable of doing them when there's no other option)
Ie. My mum went away earlier in the year and she was fine for 10 days, the day after she got home my Nanna had a 'funny turn' and rang an ambulance and made my mum go to hospital with her
We all know she's attention seeking but we all sort of roll our eyes and let her get on with it because she's old and probably quite bored, and really what can you do?

Last week my 1 year old had a nasty accident where he chopped half of his thumb off in a door, he had surgery to reattach it and is thankfully going to be ok but everyone was obviously in a bit of a panic
My mum took me to A&E when it happened and to an appointment this week to have his bandages changed (I don't have a car atm and he has to go to the children's hospital on the other side of the city)

The next day we were meant to be taking my Nanna shopping, so my mum picks me up then we go to collect Nanna who when we get there refuses to go if I'm going because 'she's sick of the baby being all anyone thinks about, he'll be getting all the attention and she might aswell not be there anyway, she's sick of my mum not being available because of the baby, why couldn't I take him to hospital myself?' Etc etc
She went on for a while and really upset my mum
My mum said she was being horrible and I was probably not going to want to speak to her after this and my Nanna replied 'I don't care I'm upset'

So basically she's having a tantrum because a baby got more attention than her while he was injured and she was fine

I don't want to see her or speak to her after being so mean and spiteful and she's already said she's no intention of apologising - yet it somehow feels wrong, she's very old and it's almost Christmas?!
Should I stand my ground on this one??

I also think it could be some form of early dementia. Poor lady - she must feel so worried and scared about dying. With dementia the person does not 'put on' their behaviour, the dementia causes their mood swings. My mum acted like a child in her last year, and she thought she was a child and I was in turn either her sister or her mother. She could be so loving one day and nasty the next. BUT there is no way I could not see her and no way would I have called her the horrible names on here. Karma happens and one day some of you will be old.

Another one flagging up dementia. My grandmother was eccentric but kind and lovely until her early eighties. We had always been very close (I was more her daughter than granddaughter). Then, suddenly, it was like she hated me at times, which was so hard as she had always been so loving and put my happiness above all things. She also appeared to be deeply manipulative as she could 'put on a face' for strangers but be really horrible to me behind closed doors. I had no idea what was going on as I had never had any experience of dealing with dementia.

She decided she wanted to come and live with me but she was so nasty to me I just couldn't cope with her as she wanted my undivided attention 24 hours a day and, even then, she was angry and unhappy with me all the time. When I said no to her living with me and started to talk to her about going into sheltered housing she started bad mouthing me to all sorts of random people and telling them that I was only after her money etc. She even tried to persuade her sister - my great aunt - to pretend that she had asked my Nan to live with her in an attempt to guilt me into asking her to live with me. Fortunately my great aunt realised that something was very wrong and telephoned me to tell me what my Nan had been saying, it was only at this point that I realised that she had dementia. She had disguised her gradual slide into it really well and had probably been ill for a couple of years but, because it manifested itself mainly in fluctuating behavioural changes, it had been really hard to realise that it wasn't just her getting old and more eccentric. In retrospect there were clues but my Nan was very clever and managed to hide them very well.