School sends 10yr old DS home to empty house.

[khaleesi71]

I work 50 miles from home and DH is SAHD. Yesterday DS was to go to an after school club until 4. However he 'hurt' his ankle and said he didn't want to do his activity. I say 'hurt' as our old cat was put to sleep this week with little notice and he's been sad and clingy (understandably). The school know this. As DS was not due back until 4 he was out on some errands. Unfortunately the area has a dreadful signal and there are some complete black spots so he did not see the 4 missed calls from the school. When he emerged from the black spot he picked up a message to say 'Finlay didn't want to do his club, he's hurt his ankle and we've sent him home'. To an empty house. DS was scared and upset but had the sense to take himself to a friends house and they wrote a note to put through our letter box so DH knew where he was when he got home. DH had come home as they were doing this. We have complained to the school and asked for their policy on this but I'm so cross that they put DS in this vulnerable position. Is this normal practice? I can't understand why they didn't keep him in his (paid for) after school activity whilst they contacted DH - who would have picked him up at 4 anyway.

Star

Have you read the OP's post about what happened to her DS previously?

Anyway, it is less the going home and the more no one being there and no key.

Is the club run by outsiders? May be they were not aware of the schools policy or on just what to do!
I work in a secondary school and we hear alsorts from visitors/ supply teachers etc.
Its no excuse though, ultimatly the kids are schools responsibility until hand over. I would be livid if this had happened to my kid. X

YANBU

My kids school there is an option to tick for these after school activities. To be picked up or to walk home. I would be annoyed if mine were sent along their way like that!

It's a clear safeguarding issue that needs dealing with. It's not good enough to leave a message. Instructions need to be given from a parent to ensure a child is safe. You nerf to see the head.

So annoying when people don't read the whole thread, or at least OP's posts. YADNBU.

It really is quite simple. If the DS normally has permission to walk home, on these days the school is safe to assume that someone will be home when he gets there. However, on days when he is usually at an activity, the school should realise that his parents won't be expecting him home until 4pm and might very well not be home before that. Especially if they have tried to call and not got a response.

Totally stupid and irresponsible of them. I hope they have a very good look at their policies as a result of this.

I don't think the school did the right thing at all. They should have called you when they couldn't reach your dh. It's not at all difficult to work out that if a child is expected to be collected at 4pm, there may well not be a caregiver available until that time and sending them home in the hope that someone is there to meet them is silly.

It's nothing to do with mollycoddling it's more like protecting ! My twins are 9 and I wouldn't even let them walk up to the corner shop on the same side of the road as our house on their own in this day and age .
They couldn't walk to school alone as it is a 30+ minute walk anyway but I would still take them if it was close !
I dread when the time comes for them to go off to secondary school - but I will have no choice but to give them some independence .
Anyway - at our school , the teacher has a list of who is collecting the children each day (or if they can walk home alone - with a signed form saying they can) and if it has to change for any reason the school has to be notified .

My daughter would have stayed at school, or gone back. If he usually walks home with friends and wasn't going to his club, surely the school would have assumed he was walking home with them? We have somewhere my dd can go should she find herself home without me there. It's a good contingency plan. Her school would also have had no problem if she'd returned to school to wait for me to pick her up, as was the case when her club was cancelled but I didn't get a message until later.

The school have s duty of care to ensure a child goes home safely. Complain, they have failed to ensure your son went home safely. Out of order.

As a 'designated' safeguarding teacher I find this unbelievable. If you don't get an honest and appropriate response I would contact ofsted. I work In a high school. If a child is meant to be on detention for half an hour or so and they fall ill or something I always contact parents before allowing them offsite. I am gobsmacked.

YANBU. Really surprised the school did this. I'm one of the secretaries at our local primary school and it certainly wouldn't happen there. Any member of staff running a cub takes a register which is then returned to the school office. Any child not attending will have a text sent to parents to confirm they are aware not at club and are safe. If a child is expected to be at club and doesn't want to participate they stay and watch. Quite frankly it's just not good enough on the part of your child's school and they need to improve their safeguarding.

Sorry utterly shocking! You don't send a child off on their own, without so much as -a friend/ haven't been able to get hold of parents! School could be in serious trouble, for this, they have a duty of care - clearly not followed! Alll those people saying your child should have said no, I'm sorry but children don't generally question / refuse their teachers, whilst it may have put a great fear in him he would have felt obliged to just comply!

I worked as a school nurse and was not allowed to send a sick or hurt child home. The parents had to collect. This was an 11 to 18 school.

I used to teach year 5 and 6 at an after school club which ended at 5pm. The rule was that no child would be let out of the school unless collected by a parent or grandparent. I had to keep them in the school porch until each parent was identified. Obviously over time, I got to know which person collected which child. There were never more than 15 in the group and the only exception to the rule, was if a parent had sent in a handwritten letter to allow us to let the child go home on their own. And yes, there were times when I was still there at 5.30 waiting for parents who were running late or uncontactable. I would definitely take this up with your school and get them to review their policies for after school clubs.

YANBU - This is a serious safeguarding issue. I work in a secondary school and we would not entertain the thought of sending a student home without parental permission. It is not you DH's fault, he was clearly expecting him home later. Your son should have been sat in ASC until the time came for him to go home and only then if your DH hadn't arrived at school should he have been allowed to go with friends.

Dreadful dreadful dreadful! Please complain, the school should not have done this. And anyone babbling on about what age your children should walk home alone can shut their traps. It's your child and you alone say when they can do things. The school have a duty of care and a duty to respect your decisions as their parent. Best of luck x

I'm glad the school have apologised & are looking at their policies again. I don't think whether the child normally walks home alone or not comes into it..he was unwell/sore ankle so should be collected/met by a responsible adult & they should have kept him at school until that person arrived. Just for the record my son has just started secondary & felt a little unwell last week, not sick or anything but I was called to collect him because it was too far for him to walk alone (during the day). Glad your son is ok though x

OP said his foot wasn't actually injured he was just upset about the cat, so I don't think they sent him hobbling off home one legged or anything. Sounds like he decided to skip the club, the school should have made sure they spoke to DH but otherwise he's walked home on his own before, despite the perv incident OP has obviously continued to allow him to walk alone/with friends so doesn't really add anything to it. I'd just make sure you get him a key and teach him how to open his mouth and say I'm not allowed to do a b or c. As PP's have said, treat it as a learning experience Hope you all aren't too traumatised by the whole thing

Reference this: He doesn't have a key. The arrangement is that he can walk home with friends after school. For the after school club (run and managed by the school) DH has to pick him up and notify of any changes to this arrangement. As this happened after school had finished his friends had already gone home.

Absolutely they should NOT have sent him home. You did not know where he was. You thought he was at After School Club. Heaven forbid if anything had happened. I would definitely take this up with the school. Yes, they attempted to contact you BUT were not able to do so. Therefore prior arrangement still stands - this is an issue of safeguarding.

For the record op we are still yearly signing at dds secondary that in situations like this/power cut etc whether children can just come home without notice or whether they can come home after the school calling a parent or whether they need to be kept at school. Maybe suggest a form like that to them.

It is less for me about the walk home from school. Many year 6 do this alone but more for me that he usually arrives home to Dad at home to let him him whereas if there is a regular afterschool club it is reasonable for a parent to stay out until the end of the session and pick up on the way back therefore causing panic when a parent arrives at school to find the child not there and a child outside a house for an hour in very cold weather.

Sorry pressed post too soon. DDS old school had an hour power cut early one morning and said to the kids 'if someone is at home you can go'. What 11 year old is going to stay in school in a little group with the teacher while their mates leave?

So of course all the 11 year olds said they had someone at home and went. It took hours for the whole school text to go out and half the kids had no one at home and no keys.

People went bonkers.

How old is him?

It really is quite simple. If the DS normally has permission to walk home, on these days the school is safe to assume that someone will be home when he gets there. However, on days when he is usually at an activity, the school should realise that his parents won't be expecting him home until 4pm and might very well not be home before that. Especially if they have tried to call and not got a response.

this absolutely.
Parents would not expect him till 4pm, therefore he should not have been allowed to leave early without confirming with parents.

It is a safeguarding issue, because they sent him home without confirming that there was anyone there to receive him. You could liken it to school shutting unexpectedly for eg power cut and just sending kids home at 2pm, saying that they normally walk home, so what is the problem? There would be uproar.

to be fair to the school they have apologised and said it absolutely was not acceptable and are reviewing their processes.