To think this could be the most embarrassing parent moment EVER?

[Saucisson2016]

13 year old son found my rampant rabbit!!!!

[SemiNormal]

Stressful day, this thread has cheered me right up!

I went on holiday once when I was about 17yrs old. My mum went into my bedroom to tidy whilst I was gone. I'd left my vibrator under the duvet (obviously not knowing she would be going in there). When I arrived home the bedroom was spotless and there on my bedside table, stood upright, was my vibrator. Neither of us mentioned it, ever.

[Bushybrenda1]

Ahaha your poor kid. He will be scarred for life now

I found my mums when I was a teenager. It even had a name, Big Ben ahaha

[Beeziekn33ze]

Still laughing about Mr Shakey who lives in the wash basket. Will the book and animation be out for Christmas?!

[sanityisamyth]

I had a surveyor come to see the house before I sold it. I thought I'd tidied up upstairs.

The surveyor arrived, did his look around the house (including my bedroom) and left.

It was only when I back upstairs I realised I'd left my rabbit on the bedside table

[SilentBiscuits]

This is definitely ending up in the Daily Mail!

My friend (honest!) left her vibrator on the floor. She forgot her cleaner was coming round that day.

I said "did she put it in the bedside drawer?"

And she told me no - she'd put it back in its special box, at the back of the wardrobe...

Cleaners know EVERYTHING.

[Allout]

This is about the 5th thread of this exact subject I've read since being on mumsnet . It appears to be a common occurance. It's always a rampant rabbit as well

You seem to be getting off quite lightly. Last poster who posted this got flamed for being disgusting and leaving it out etc etc.

Funny old place this is.

[GrabtharsHammer]

Mine switched itself on in the suitcase en route to a dirty weekend with Dh (lovely boy Friday as he was then). We were in the queue for check in and neither of us noticed until a very well to do lady tapped me on the shoulder and said 'your luggage is vibrating, dear'.

[GrabtharsHammer]

Boyfriend not boy Friday! That conjures up a whole different thing!

[rococo80]

I found lube in my teenage sons drawer - knicked out of my bedside cupboard ( shocked face) how do you moan about that one?

[Idratherbeaunicorn]

I'm a fully functioning adult (28 yo, mortgage, job, married and expecting) - stayed at my mums this weekend. Because I'm 35 weeks pregnant she let me stay in her room so I was more comfortable - styod as proud as punch on the bedside shelf was some boxes of condoms, lube and an Ann Summers bag.... Didn't look in the bag... Suppose I should be grateful she's practicing safe sex, even at 60!

[Klaptout]

Oh no!
Do you think he brought your story are were you let down by your blushes?

My DDs special needs school had a whole school assembly for a visit with a community policeman.
PC stood at the front and held aloft some handcuffs, "anyone know what these are?"
DD was the first to keenly answer, " they're braclets my mums got lots of them in her bedroom drawer, it's a special drawer, mum says children aren't allowed in there"
I do have a jewellery drawer but I had never owned any handcuffs.
Teacher and DD didn't mention the handcuff incident, until.....
Presentation evening, DD got her achievement year book, a book full of photos, a lovely one of DD standing with the policeman whilst holding the handcuffs!
They were all giggling at me in the governors meeting, I had a lot of teasing.
My mate thought it would be a hoot to send me a birthday gift my mail, my DD opened the present, pink fluffy handcuffs, she popped them in her bag for show and tell, I used major distraction (chocolate buttons) and rescued them.

When in Lanzorote we went in a shop that sold some odd things crutchless knickers and a basque adorned a mannequin, I enticed him away to look at some skull wristbands, whilst congratulating my rapid thinking, he marches up to join me and DDs at the till, promptly puts the two wristbands on the counter, then stands this huge wooden hand carved penis on the counter and asked if he could buy it to use to keep his wristbands tidy.
I only go out with them in heavy disguise.


Was I little worried about our trip to Amsterdam but did manage to avoid the sex shop etc

[saltandvinegarcrisps1]

Took ds to the bathroom with me when he was about 4 and when we came out (at a family meal in swanky restaurant) he announced to everyone " my mummy's got blue string hanging out her bum" (lilets)

[Flumpsnlumpsnstuff]

My dd1 then aged 4/5 went to school jabbering about her pretty bracelet, when I went to collect her after school the lovely giggling teacher commented that I may want to find a new hiding place for vibrating cock ring bracelets However at least 2 mums asked where I got them as their dad's came home asking for vibrating brackets I muttered gift from abroad and ran

[Flumpsnlumpsnstuff]

*dd's -not dads !

[Saucisson2016]

Glad to hear I'm not the only one
Had a few last night, for the shock

[Tomorrowillbeachicken]

My cousin once stuck my aunts tampons up his nose thinking they were used to stop nosebleeds.
He also blew up condoms thinking they were balloons.

[ShotsFired]

Saucisson2016 Gutted envy me and DH had a spare half hour earlier baby was asleep had a spot of afternoon delight with toys included and left it in there after the wash down...

So you don't have a penis beaker (and accoutrements) on the bedside table then?

[Fadingmemory]

DS (in long queue for the loo in a department store just before Christmas) was looking at the Tampax machine and and said in a clear, piping voice, 'Look Mummy, those things like the ones you put in your bottom.' Had no idea he had ever observed the process.

[SteppingOnToes]

My exMIL had a habit of rooting in drawers (even went to the point of rearranging my underwear drawer) - I bought the biggest double ended dildo and left it on top in my knicker drawer. She will never look at her son the same again - nosy bitch!

[SirSidneyRuffDiamond]

I had a hen party at my house once and afterwards a porn DVD was left behind. I pushed it under the TV cabinet and forgot about it. A few months later we moved house and had the professional packers and unpackers in. Once in our new home we decided to rearrange some furniture, only to discover the said DVD still underneath the cabinet. Which means the packers found it, packed it, unpacked it and replaced it at the new house. I wasn't sure whether to applaud their professionalism or curl up embarrassment.

[AdoraBell]

Mr Shakey

I can't get passed that one

[TheNewWife]

SirSidneyRuffDiamond

Oh that is bloody hilarious! I'm in the middle of a very long and slow queue and I just erupted at your post. I can sense folk behind me surreptitiously trying to sneak a peek over my shoulder to see what I'm reading!

[Mynestisfullofempty]

SirSidneyRuffDiamond I had no idea that people watch porn at hen parties!

[Niggit]

[susiella]

I'm intrigued by Boogers traumatic time in Hillsborough with Chris's kinky penis. Is that in Hillsborough, Sheffield? Just wondering if I know him........