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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What to expect from a cleaner

267 replies

broodymamma · 23/11/2016 11:52

Is it too much to expect my cleaner to actually tidy my house. I have 5 kids the eldest being 8. They are very efficient at turning my house upside down. But up till now I have had a cleaner every day for at least 4 hours. If she finds a kids skipping rope say on the kitchen floor she will pick it up and put it on a chair and tuck chair in rather than find the appropriate place to put it. Worst still if she goes to the playroom to tidy and finds feltips with the lids off she will not replace the lids. She will gather the whole lot and toss them into the nearest toybox. She will often be met with a mixture of games of various sorts that have been played with but unfortunately not been put away. She will make no effort to tidy each game into the appropriate box but toss the whole lot in to whichever toy box is nearest. I guess that if this doesn't suit me I should look for a replacement cleaner. but just wondering if I am expecting too much and a replacement wouldn't be any better. I know my kids need to learn to tidy up after themselves and I am working on this.

OP posts:
CaesiumTime · 23/11/2016 16:40

babyapril why do you think her domestic life is challenging? Confused

babyapril · 23/11/2016 16:47

Caesium well, it hardly sounds a breeze!
If my eight year old couldn't put a lid on a felt tip pen , l'd definitely think about staggering my kids out a bit!

Alabastard · 23/11/2016 16:53

Well OP. You've made some spectacularly poor decisions.

Nanny0gg · 23/11/2016 16:56

I recommend these:

ebay

broodymamma · 23/11/2016 17:02

Good idea!

OP posts:
MauiWest · 23/11/2016 17:03

babyapril obviously believes that the OP doesn't need any help, and should just put her 8 yo child in charge of the house work and tidying up after the 4 younger ones.

broodymamma · 23/11/2016 17:04

babyapril why do you assume it's the 8 year old cannot replace the lids?

OP posts:
Underthemoonlight · 23/11/2016 17:08

You still have yet to tell us your cleaners salary op

CaesiumTime · 23/11/2016 17:09

Yes, Maui and I never knew that your 8 year old had to be able to put a lid on a marker before you should have another child. Who knew.

My DC are naturally disorganised, it makes me nutty, both their father and I are super organised but alas they did not inherit said gene. They are good at other things, organisation not being one of them.

The OP can afford help, can afford to feed and clothe her children and can afford to hire help to manage her household and she's getting flack for being "lazy". This is insane. Women can't win for trying.

If she couldn't afford to feed the children she would be a lazy feckless scrounger and yet she can afford the children and can afford help to get through and she's still a lazy feckless person who makes "spectacularly poor decisions"

At what point can a woman win?

MrsHiddleston · 23/11/2016 17:09

Okay so she's employed as a home help rather than cleaner. I see. Well you clearly don't find her much of a help. So you either draw up a list of tasks and responsibilities and going through them with her and give her a chance to come up to your standards. If that fails. Then you need to look elsewhere. BUT you also need to get your children cleaning up after themselves. They need to be responsible family members. I don't have 5 children, I have 1 but mine has been putting his own toys away from 2 (clearly with my help initially). He's now 6 and he tidies up after himself. If he doesn't look after his things, they go or he doesn't get the next thing he wants because he couldn't look after the first thing, it's that simple. Any toys brought down during the day go back up and are tidied away before bed. It's all about getting them into a habit.

Elendon · 23/11/2016 17:11

Cleaners clean. If you want to have a person in to tidy and clean then you pay them a lot!

Putting away children's toy's is something a family should do.

CaesiumTime · 23/11/2016 17:14

Putting away children's toy's is something a family should do.

If she wants to pay someone to put away her children's toys that is her prerogative. Maybe she should manage her household the way that she wants to manage it.

MauiWest · 23/11/2016 17:20

Au-pairs tidy up children toys, and they are paid A LOT less than than cleaners.

Thankfully independent cleaners have the right to decide what they accept to do or not, and don't have to have their work schedule dictated by the MN police. There is such a shortage in my area that they can pick and chose their clients.

harderandharder2breathe · 23/11/2016 17:23

Putting toys away is something families do because tidying up after themselves is a life skill that children need to learn! How many threads are there on here about housemates/husbands who never learned to tidy up after themselves!

petitpois55 · 23/11/2016 17:31

Even very young kids at nursery have to tidy up at the end of each session. The mind boggles at an eight year old not doing it. And you have four other kids as well!! Bloody hell. Perhaps you should have had less kids,

MauiWest · 23/11/2016 17:34

good grief, they are children. My little ones play in the morning whilst I get the youngest ones ready, and they don't always tidy up everything before we have to go. I don't expect them to wait in silence on the stairs until we go. That doesn't mean they will grow up being slobs. I would hate them to be too afraid to disturb anything. There's a balance. Of course they have to make their beds before they go downstairs, but would it be reasonable to forbid them to play with their toys?

ShowMePotatoSalad · 23/11/2016 17:34

MauiWest I don't think it's a case of the "MN police" saying what a cleaner can and can't be. It's more of a case of the possibility that this person began their job as a cleaner and has had more of more jobs put on them and may or may not be happy with this arrangement. I don't care if she employs someone to shine her shoes for 4 hours a day, it's totally her prerogative. Just wonder how much of the responsibilities of the job were laid out before the person started work.

MauiWest · 23/11/2016 17:37

How many threads are there on here about housemates/husbands who never learned to tidy up after themselves!

How many more threads about women who hate people who turn up unannounced because they are mortified about the state of their home. Maybe they should get a house keeper.

MauiWest · 23/11/2016 17:38

ShowMePotatoSalad You are absolutely right.

petitpois55 · 23/11/2016 17:42

Maybe they should get a house keeper

Or maybe they could pull their finger out and do it themselves.

CaesiumTime · 23/11/2016 17:46

Is tidying up really that complicated that it takes 16 years of training? My DH never tidied a god damned thing in his life growing up (wrongly or rightly that's how it was for him) and when he moved out on his own he managed to work it out. It didn't require 16 years of "tidy up" training from his family.

Organisational skills aren't taught exclusively through tidying up toys...

shrunkenhead · 23/11/2016 17:52

It's a joke thread. OP has said her thanks and goodbyes. We'll never know how much the "cleaner " got paid or why on earth she allows her dh to wear socks with sandals (a crime on so many levels!).....sad but true.

Lalal00p5y · 23/11/2016 17:54

OP has 5 young children! Give her a break! Yes maybe she needs to get a house keeper not a cleaner! But calling her lazy is a bit rude!

petitpois55 · 23/11/2016 17:55

Yep definitely a joke thread, but amusing nonetheless to see how many people thought she was not only real, but completely reasonable[ as well.Smile

CaesiumTime · 23/11/2016 18:02

Why do you think the DM would give a flying fuck that someone has a Mother's helper, petitpois?

Look at Gumtree - ads for positions like this are in their thousands in London. It's not scandalous or even rare.

.

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