"daddy was doing press-ups on mummy" AIBU to be smarting with embarrassment...

[docomein]

DS who is 7 walked in on us in the middle of the night and caught us at it. DH saw him straight away, was right at the point of delivery, DS must have seen a couple of seconds worth though. This morning he saw the neighbour and told her all about it, including a rendition of the funny noises mummy was making which apparently were so loud they woke him up. We were a bit drunk, had just sent the babysitter home. I checked on him in his room and he was sound asleep, closed door.

How can I stop him telling everyone?

I don't even need to look at the story to imagine the shit stock photos that they'll use.

Is it the one with two feet sticking out of the bottom of the bed? Or 'woman looking at phone with shocked expression'.

Quoted in the daily mail. My life is over

Usually the only sex DM readers have involves only one person.

More seriously, maybe even at 7 something about the 'facts of life' should be discussed with your child.

No, they have a different stock photo.

This is why I left.

You didn't do a very good job of leaving :o