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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

"daddy was doing press-ups on mummy" AIBU to be smarting with embarrassment...

81 replies

docomein · 20/11/2016 13:18

DS who is 7 walked in on us in the middle of the night and caught us at it. DH saw him straight away, was right at the point of delivery, DS must have seen a couple of seconds worth though. This morning he saw the neighbour and told her all about it, including a rendition of the funny noises mummy was making which apparently were so loud they woke him up. We were a bit drunk, had just sent the babysitter home. I checked on him in his room and he was sound asleep, closed door.

How can I stop him telling everyone?

OP posts:
GeorgeTheThird · 20/11/2016 15:52

I don't think that Op was real though

DeathpunchDoris · 20/11/2016 16:00

I am more impressed by the fact your neighbour gives reading lessons.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 20/11/2016 16:15

Woo a pbp
Well well well

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 20/11/2016 16:15

In the linked thread that is

Embletoni · 20/11/2016 16:19

As someone who used to get woken up regularly by the noises my mum made during sex when I was a child, I respectfully ask you to think about how much noise you make.

It is really horrible being woken up to your parents having sex; no-one wants to hear their mother orgasm on a regular basis.

I regret not asking them to keep it down, but it's hard to do. Thankfully you know.

Amelie10 · 20/11/2016 16:29

Yeah right this happened Hmmthink op wants a bit of a giggle on here.

Jupiter2Mars · 20/11/2016 16:50

My Dc know all the sex stuff, as well as conception, puberty etc., etc. They know everything they need to function in the world, and then some, and both knew it long before they had the remotest interest in girls.

They knew nothing at 7 though, and didn't need to. At 7, all they knew was they were made by mummy and daddy, they grew in mummy's tummy and that they were very much wanted.

However, i made the mistake when they were little of referencing their ignorance of sex on MN and got treated to a lot of people telling me how I was a terrible parent and how I should correct the gross error immediately.

My advice - there is plenty of time!

But to stop him repeating that story, he'll forget it in a day or two and meanwhile just be ready to distract him if you think he's about to tell it.

Graphista · 20/11/2016 16:53

Sorry about linked thread.

Believeitornot · 20/11/2016 16:55

Are you for real OP Hmm

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 20/11/2016 16:58

I dont think you're going to feature in the DM. Its not exactly news that you had a shag last night is. You're hardly unique are you.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 20/11/2016 16:59

Op wants a bit of a giggle.
If that is the case. I wouldn't mind, but. Its not even remotely funny.

SaltyBitch · 20/11/2016 17:10

I suppose he'll work it out eventually

Definitely! He's not going to get to 16 completely clueless Grin

MetalMidget · 20/11/2016 17:13

I wasn't prepared for that, questions about sex and how babies are made, yes. questions about porn and the stuff she'd heard the boys say such as "making her gag on his dick" I wasn't even contemplating at 6/7 years old.

I think I was about 8 when my friend showed me her mom's vibrator and her parents' porn stash, which nearly all involved women and root vegetables. :/ I knew about sex and reproduction by that point, but for years, I thought porn was all about women pleasuring themselves with carrots, and anyone who enjoyed it must be a right weirdo!

It still makes me cringe nearly 30 years later, can't imagine what her parents would have said if they knew she'd found it and promptly started showing her friends!

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 20/11/2016 17:16

Nice detail in the op about the husband being about to finish
HmmConfused

OutragedKoala · 20/11/2016 17:30

Reported.

pklme · 20/11/2016 18:03

Most wonderful book in the world, "mummy laid an egg" is an excellent introduction to mum's and dads having sex. Do look it up, this is a lovely age to share it with him. He needs it soon, while it can be loving rather than embarrassing for him.

I'm still giggling at mummy and daddy having a tickling competition to get a new brother or sister.

crashdoll · 22/11/2016 10:40

Oh for fucks sake.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 22/11/2016 11:04

They (DM) must be even more bored than I thought. If they have talk about ops sex life for a story.

I thought my life was dull and monotonous. Turns out I probably dont need to get out more after all.Grin

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 22/11/2016 18:10

Well now there's a surprise

SortAllTheThings · 22/11/2016 19:17

... And this too.

www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/mortified-woman-seeks-advice-after-9311708

No wonder everybody constantly name changes on here now. Ffs

Crowdblundering · 22/11/2016 19:30

This is why I left.

MillionToOneChances · 22/11/2016 19:36

'Mummy laid an egg' has a hilarious double page spread on the different ways mummies and daddies fit together...

Graphista · 22/11/2016 19:38

For crying out loud how LAZY do you have to be to cut n paste a story and call it journalism!

CockacidalManiac · 22/11/2016 19:38

I fucking knew those cunts from the DM would report this one.
Go out and find some real stories, you oxygen thieves.

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