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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Ds brings home school toy...wth?

198 replies

witchkat72 · 08/11/2016 17:28

Ok new to this so forgive me if on wrong board. My ds who is 4 brings home the nursery toy. The idea is for him to take said toy/puppet out with us until Monday, where I am to take pictures and write a lengthy diary entry of what ds and puppet have done. Problem is so far ds has shown no interest in even going near it/him and has categorically said it /he is not ds' friend what on earth do I do now? Take pictures of said puppet ostracized to corner of sofa? Write that its had a fab time being carted around by me in a duffle bag all weekend and ds has ignored it? Wwyd?

OP posts:

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sashh · 10/11/2016 07:08

Naughty boy toy goes in to the garden and eats mushrooms.

Spends the next three days in a coma, but is fine for nursery after the weekend.

Offred · 10/11/2016 07:55

YADNBU.

I really fucking hate these bears and the way the children come home with them at random times all excited and stressed about having to do things with them!

I wouldn't mind half as much if the school either asked first if we could take it that weekend or had a schedule for parents in advance so we knew it would be coming.

They have sent them home at some really rubbish times like moving house, exams, child in hospital.

Wixi · 10/11/2016 09:03

My daughter loves the school teddy (she's 7). We've had him twice (he even got christened when my niece did :-) ), and we had to buy her one the same for her birthday. He's a build a bear teddy with changes of clothes which she enjoys.

Shockers · 10/11/2016 09:29

Meet Derek. He was the class holiday bear in a private school .

The holiday before he came with us was in Florida, and he'd also been to Dubai, The Caribbean, Asia...

I think West Wales with us was his favourite though. He was a pretty down to earth chap.

NoRoomForALittleOne · 10/11/2016 09:29

You do realise that you have the perfect opportunity here to make every other parent at the nursery feel so much better about being landed with the toy? Maybe if you write an honest account of the toy's weekend, people will stop taking it to parties/the zoo/Disneyland?!

jwpetal · 10/11/2016 09:38

I hate these things. I have enough on my plate then to do the nursery/school's work. I always decline to take them and explain that when my children are old and have the skills they can do it. What is the purpose? What are they trying to teach? Return it and call it a day.

paxillin · 10/11/2016 09:41

Never mind class bear, we had French bear. Same shit, but in French please. Which is of course totally doable aged 7.

rubberducker · 10/11/2016 09:49

Last time we had the class bear the person who had it before us had taken it to New York for Easter. Lots of pics of bear at New York landmarks. We took it to ikea and the curry house.

Time before that DS1 came out of school with it 2 days after I'd had DS3. At least that time the teacher was honest and said it was because she wanted to see some pictures of the baby but could have done without it when I was a couple of days post c-section with a new baby. No question of not doing it though as DS was so excited about having it.

feellikeanalien · 10/11/2016 11:17

My DD has a class tiger.

When we got him he had previously been wild camping and horse riding.

Luckily we live on a farm so I took lots of shots of him on the tractor, talking to the cows, sitting on a hay bale.

I did think of taking a shot of him playing Resident Evil on the Playstation with DP but felt that might be a little too much!

weefergie56 · 10/11/2016 12:26

Do you actually need to go out and print pictures for the diary??

Hails080690 · 10/11/2016 12:30

as an experienced nursery nurse we have the same idea and send a teddy home at the weekend with a child.
we had a few children who were like your little one and have no interest in it at all. however we had a parent who wrote in the diary everything the child did that weekend without the teddy but never told us that the child had no interest in teddy so we read out the diary thinking the teddy went with the child. turns out when we started reading it the child turned around and said the teddy didn't do anything and didn't do anything with her and sat on the couch all weekend because she didn't want to play with it. this made the child upset the fact that their parents had wrote in the book and told lies after telling the child not to tell lies.
so in my personal experience and we do tell our parents this. if the child has no interest in it at all then hand it back with and tell the teacher. they then probably won't read out the diary that week. but do try and encourage your child so for example if your going for a walk ask your child if they want to take teddy with them.

Offred · 10/11/2016 13:07

Hails - do you have a schedule or ask parents if it is ok before telling the children they can take the teddy home?

Offred · 10/11/2016 13:10

Because it is quite mean to let the children take the teddy home and get excited about it (like mine do) if the parents actually just can't do it that weekend. Has put me in a really tough position several times including when I had newborn twins, was moving house etc

I think it is nice to have the home/school connection but it is so stressful and disappointing for the children and the parents if it is just thrust on you.

treacletoffee23 · 10/11/2016 13:42

Child was very busy so left toy alone. Bear felt lonely so sat on friendship bench until he was joined by Dolly. Dolly showed him all around the house and bear had a go on the swings. Dolly and bear had snacks and watched a movie. Bear tried on some of childs shoes/ gloves /wellies before falling asleep in the dogs bowl. Tried climbing up the sofa but his little fat furry legs were too short so he did some excercises . At bedtime child can listen to bears adventures- its all about recall and responsibilities but you cant force it.

Hails080690 · 10/11/2016 13:48

no what we do is put all children name into a hat and then the child that has the teddy home when they bring it back they pick the next name out the hat for which child take it home again. we then tell parents that it's their child turn etc but they can refuse if the want it not big deal for us.

Offred · 10/11/2016 13:50

That's marginally better than our school/nurseries. It just turns up on the day with no warning having been bestowed on the child as a reward.

Offred · 10/11/2016 13:52

Would still rather was done by (loose) schedule in advance. Or asked parents before telling child they could take it.

lozzylizzy · 10/11/2016 14:02

We had the same. DH took it to work one day and took a pic of the seal on his toolbox and I took it to work the next day and took a photo on my keyboard. We also had a washing machine pic.

Hails080690 · 10/11/2016 14:19

we also stress to parents that they don't have to write in the book of they don't have time. we do day to them that if they don't have time to write in books but can take photos then we encourage the parents to at least email the photos to the nursery or print them off themselves and hand them in then we also say to parents photos are not necessarily can sit down with the child and let the child explain what they done with the teddy and we write it in for the parents before reading it out. a lot of our parents are happy to do this as they feel that they are not being pressured to do it as we are well aware that family life can be very busy. we did however send out a questionnaire to parents before we started this explaining how it would all be done how the children would be picked and they were under no pressure to actually write in the book or take photos. all our parents filled out the questionnaire and it was 100% parents were up for it. we've only ever had one parent that couldn't write in it when they had the teddy home but she did email photos over.

mmgirish · 10/11/2016 15:03

I had a class toy when I taught year 1. My parent rep 'borrowed' it for a week at the end of the year. The parents presented me with a hilarious book on the last day. A group of parents took the toy all over the place to bars, a strip club, a sexual health clinic etc.

Totallybonkersmum · 10/11/2016 18:16

Wash him as he's definitely needs a wash and the teacher will put you in her good books.
Next; blag it. You'll have to get used to this as you'll be doing this until your child has finished education. I can personally guarantee that it's what every other parent in class will be doing too! 😂

pollymere · 10/11/2016 19:06

I ended up in the park in the snow...if he's not interested, it could just be a diary of what you did this weekend. These toys have been to the ballet but just a simple diary is fine.

mamma125 · 10/11/2016 19:23

I always see this and think, what about those poor parents who work pretty much all the time with older and younger kids at home maybe even a newborn and they're expected to do this seems a little unreasonable... I have a babe in arms so not at school age yet so maybe I am clueless!

Offred · 10/11/2016 19:27

just a diary of what you did this weekend

When they sent it home when I had newborn twins that would have been.

"Barnaby and I sat on the sofa watching TV all weekend. We had to turn the volume up to cover the sounds of mum crying about not being able to wash/bleeding nipples/lack of sleep/having to find the time to take pictures of barnaby sitting on the sofa all weekend and stick them in a stupid book"

Offred · 10/11/2016 19:32

Instead what happened was it stayed at our house for ages longer than it was meant to because DS wanted to do it properly and I was all over the place and then I ended up managing to get it back to school without even having written in the bloody book.

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