To think she is completely overreacting

[Queenofthecats]

and being a total bitch

DP and I are currently having work done on our house so are staying with MIL.

She is really funny about people using her washing machine and dryer, BIL actually his girlfriend broke the last 2 washing machines so understandable, so does everyone's washing. We've been here for about a month so far and in that time despite taking our washing serval times and muddling with everyone else's so I can't take it and do elsewhere without having to go through everything we've had probably less than 10 items back. She keeps putting washes on and then leaving it days so it starts smelling and having to be washed again so one wash is done a billion times before we've got anything back. So far since being here she's completed 2 loads.

Obviously at some point I'm going to have run out of clothes, especially underwear which can't be worn a few times before washing, so yesterday afternoon I mentioned to MIL that I'm getting low so could I use the washing machine this one time and she got all huffy and said she would do it. The load she had put on is still in there. 🙄 I asked if I could at the very least get a few pairs of knickers that I'll put on the radiator in our room and DP told me I could and I didn't need to ask. Whilst doing that she saw me and shouted at me to stop and she would put it all in the dryer when she's finished what she was doing she still hasn't

This was at about 6 and MIL has been sulking since. She's told DP I had no right to touch her washing machine and she isn't going to talk/cook/wash/do anything for me until I apologise.

She's being U right? Or should I never have touched her precious washing machine?

I'm just at the end of not having anything clean to wear now. I never thought I'd be so upset about not having pants.

I ofc totally appreciate MIL letting us stay here and everything she does, Its just frustrating and i needed to get it out and I can't moan to DP about it.

She's being ridiculous.

Either take it to the launderette or your mum's. Is there any chance you could stay with your mum for a few days so you can both have a break from each other?

Oh, ignore my comment about her being elderly, she's in her forties!?
I lived with my MIL for a while and it caused irreparable damage to our relationship. I just found it hard to cope with all her foibles.
Get out as soon as you can!

You don't cook or clean either??

Of course I clean, she doesn't let me cook though.

Honestly it can't be that hard for you to just bag up your washing before dp brings it down??

Why not stay at your mum's? This is obviously not working.

No I cant stay with my mum unfortunately, she doesn't have room.

We're here until after Christmas.

We get on lovely mostly, I have a better relationship with her than my own mum, she's just a real PITA about her washing machine/dryer/oven.

Honestly it can't be that hard for you to just bag up your washing before dp brings it down??

In theory no, but I'd waited for a full wash people taking it somewhere to wash it. DP just takes it all down randomly.

She's being ridiculous, YANBU.

Shes a bit crazy but is still doing you a favour by letting you stay there. You have to just bite your tongue and put up with it. Tell your dp you are keeping your stuff seperate from his and not to touch it then go and do it at your mums/a launderette. If he keeps moving it then go mental at him- he should be used to that with his mum!

Do all your washing at your mums from now on and tell your DP that if he wants his stuff done there you'll take it too or he can let his mum not do his bits and let the 2 of them get on with it.

Holding house guests to ransom about talking, cooking and cleaning over touching a bloody washing machine is ridiculous. Just rise above it OP and keep out of it by taking your stuff to your mums. Politely ignore any insistence from MIL. Hang in there. Not long till new year.

My mum has similar OCD about her washing machine, carpets and sofas. It's partly down to things being broken/ruined but then she did have 7 dc!

I'd just go to the laundrette. With cooking, just buy a slow cooker. Leave it to cook all day and serve up when you're ready. There's always a way around their madness

She is clearly nuts about this but if you have a lovely relationship normally then just go with it. Live and let live. People are weird sometimes

I don't think you can break a washing machine by putting the powder in at the wrong time.
If by 'wrong place' you mean the GF tried to stuff in in via the motor at the back then, yes, you can break it by doing that

Seriously. I have been doing a lot of washing for a loooooong time. Washing machines have to be tougher than that.

I didn't by think your BIL/gf broke either washing machine.

This is a psychological issue for your MIL. It's not even that rare. My mother had it. It deeply affected mine and my siblings' childhoods. I think you can have sympathy, but she won't change because she's so anxious and angry, and you need to make alternative practical arrangements.

Don't even try and analyse it. Just find a launderette that does service washes.

I don't think

She sounds crazy

Start putting all your washing in a bag and tell dp not to take it down, if he wants his done let him and you take your own washing to a launderette or dm

Agree that you get a washing bag just for you, tell DH not to touch it and wash at your DM or laundrette. People are allowed to be as irrational and odd in their own house as they like. God knows my mother is...

Just saw this, are you letting her cook and clean for you as well? No wonder she has had enough of you!

Didn't it occur to you that a woman who had a fit if someone tries to use the washer is probably more than a little bit precious about her cooker too?

Didn't it occur to you that a woman who had a fit if someone tries to use the washer is probably more than a little bit precious about her cooker too?

Didn't occur to you that when you live in someone elses house for over a month you shouldn' whine about them doing your cooking and cleaning and washing AND encourage strangers online to call them "bonkers, nuts and crazy"

Have some fucking class.

And having a fit? Really?
Nice disabilist language there/

Have some fucking class.

Oh, the irony.

Didn't occur to you that when you live in someone elses house for over a month you shouldn' whine about them doing your cooking and cleaning and washing AND encourage strangers online to call them "bonkers, nuts and crazy"

Have some fucking class.

I'm not whining about her doing my cooking and washing, I'm "whining" that she has said she will do, takes it all, then doesn't do it and refuses to even let me take something out of the washing machine.

I'm really grateful for her letting us stay here but I didn't actually want to, it was MIL who insisted and DP who refused to stay anywhere else.

She isnt doing the washing though is she?

And having a fit? Really?
Nice disabilist language there

Oh joy - a member of the professionally offended brigade.

Like I said, it's a psychological issue, that has repercussions for the family. Is that so hard to grasp?

I ideally would've stayed somewhere closer to our house and somewhere that I can do the basic things with out someone jumping on me and complaining.