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AIBU?

to think that not wearing a poppy counting as a uniform disciplinary issue is wrong?

193 replies

Bogeyface · 04/11/2016 23:18

DD's school have said this, and yes I have checked with the school.

Dont get me wrong, no issue personally with poppies. However I dont think that the school can insist on pupils wearing a poppy to the point that they can be put into isolation for not wearing one, can they?

A poppy is an act of remembrance and if a person has no reason to wear one, or prefers not to, then how is that any of the schools business? I dont wear one, but I buy 2 crosses every year for my grandfathers graves who both fought and suffered horribly during WWII. I remember, I just dont wear a poppy.

DD has chosen to wear one, but says that most of her peers wear them because they have to, not because they care. There have been no assemblies or lessons about why poppies are worn and what the represent so she thinks that in the main this rule is pointless.

OP posts:

Report

Bogeyface · 04/11/2016 23:41

Cat can I do that? I am learning a lot tonight!

So I could ask how many fresh new poppies they use and how much the RBL is donated for that?

OP posts:

Bogeyface · 04/11/2016 23:42

And conversely, how many ironed old poppies they re-use.....

OP posts:

KathySelden · 04/11/2016 23:49

My Husband is Irish and does not wear one and has never worn one as he sees the British Army as a symbol of oppression. The poppy also is for all conflicts not just WW1 and WW2. He understands why I wear on and understand why he doesn't.

Why should we have to wear one, every year the poppy police become more and more prolific, spurred on by vile groups like Britain First, it disgusts me and I for the first time will be wearing a white poppy this year. It no longer represents what it was designed to represent and has been co opted by people who I wish not to associate with. I will still however donate to the Legion.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 04/11/2016 23:53

What I want to know is whether there is a donation to the RBL for every fresh new poppy worn by each TV person.

Thing is you would have no idea if the individual has bought one though.

MagikarpetRide · 04/11/2016 23:56

I wear a sparkly poppy brooch rather than the paper poppies - an actual British Legion one - because the paper ones never stay on and I'm beginning to wonder how good they are environmentally with the plastic stalks.

My DCs want to wear poppies because all the family do, not because they understand the significance. I think I'd be mightily peed off if school tried to enforce it. I'd be happy if they encouraged it from a personal standpoint but that's different from making the kids wear it.

PuppetInParadize · 04/11/2016 23:58

I think that's a very poor decision of the school. I'd be challenging it. The poppy argument has got out of hand. I remember the war dead in my own way, am aware of the history of conflicts, have visited graves in France, the Netherlands, and other places, have taught the DC about it too, but I've not worn a poppy for about 20 years. I've no idea if anyone judges me for it and I don't care. Imagine if a child gets disciplined when they've had a poppy but it's fallen off their coat, or some bully has nicked it. Ludicrous.

Bogeyface · 04/11/2016 23:59

Oh dont get me fucking started on those Britain First cunts co-opting the poppy. The RBL have distanced themselves as far as possible, but sadly the poppy has been used by those arseholes just as the Union flag has.

Fair point piglet but I cant help thinking that there is a wardrobe assistant who's job is to pin on fresh new poppies during the first 2 weeks of November.

OP posts:

hareOrRabbit · 05/11/2016 00:13

What I want to know is whether there is a donation to the RBL for every fresh new poppy worn by each TV person.

Thing is you would have no idea if the individual has bought one though.

you don't BUY a poppy.you make a donation and get a free poppy.

if you are on TV during poppy "season"- certainly at the BBC -anyway they have poppies and collection tins in the green room and they ask you if you want to wear one/donate. so yes there is a donation.

Fairenuff · 05/11/2016 00:14

he said that if someone chose not to wear one because of their beliefs then that would be respected

That seems fine to me. What's your problem with that?

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 05/11/2016 00:17

I don't wear a poppy.
I'm not British by birth so none of it is my inherited history and I think it would be very weird for me to wear one.
I mean if anyone asked "who are you remembering?" I'd have to say "nobody, I wear it because. ...ummm....????"
It would be equally weird to me if while living in Hungary DH (who is English) would be wearing a symbol of rememberance on the 15th March. If he wanted to I wouldn't stop him but would certainly not require him to wear one.

I wore a poppy a few years ago to a rememberance service, because I thought I'd like to show respect & sympathy, but I just felt like I'm sticking my nose in someone else's business.

DH wears one and if the kids chose to wear one that'd be totally fine. But to be forced? Totally out of order!

Bubbinsmakesthree · 05/11/2016 00:21

I don't wear a poppy for various reasons (partly just stubbornly rejecting poppy pressure and partly not being 100% comfortable with what the poppy is sometimes seem to represent). I think it is completely inappropriate for anyone to be compelled or pressured to wear a poppy.

I nearly ended up doing a TV interview this week (I work for a big public-facing organisation) and was told by my media officer to make sure I'd got a poppy in advance to save grief at the TV studio. In the end they did a recorded audio interview instead so I am none the wiser!

PickAChew · 05/11/2016 00:23

Between this idea and the ever so tedious kerfuffle with Fifa, I'm so over poppies, this year

PuppetInParadize · 05/11/2016 00:35

Now that Theresa May (who annoys me more every time I hear her) has spoken about the FIFA poppy malarkey in the Commons, i think I'd be even less keen to wear a poppy. I'd be fine about donating money but I don't need to wear the symbol.

DanceTheBlues · 05/11/2016 00:38

I work with the Army and even they are told it's a matter of choice if they want to wear one or not. I've never seen anyone I work with pressured into wearing one if they don't want to. I certainly haven't been.

previously1474907171 · 05/11/2016 00:38

I buy a red poppy and usually lose it, I will also buy and wear a purple one if I can find one, it becomes a case of which one will I lose first.

I wear them from choice, I wouldn't force someone else to wear one.

TheFairyCaravan · 05/11/2016 00:41

partly not being 100% comfortable with what the poppy is sometimes seem to represent

It's a symbol of remembrance. That's all it is. Nothing else. And quite frankly I''m pig sick of people making it in to something it's not.

Wear one or don't wear one it's up to you. I do, DH and DS1 are in the armed forces so it's important to me. I wish people would stop making a song and dance about it.

TheFairyCaravan · 05/11/2016 00:42

I work with the Army and even they are told it's a matter of choice if they want to wear one or not

DS1 isn't. He's given a date by which to be wearing a poppy by. And quite right too considering men have been dying under his cap badge in the last decade.

caroldecker · 05/11/2016 00:43

No pressure - but for those who would like to wear one but find the plastic ones difficult to keep nice/fit, here has some nice enamel ones.

UterusUterusGhali · 05/11/2016 00:43

Crikey! No YANBU!

I don't wear one any more because it has become to symbolise exactly what those who died fought against.

People get so frothy. How DARE anyone say I don't think about the people who died in the Great War? I named my son after a relative who died aged 15 in WWI
The idea of wearing a symbol on my lapel by force is odious to me, because of my family history.

I hate the sparkley/knitted ones that give no money to the RBL.

I wear a white one through choice.

Baylisiana · 05/11/2016 00:44

I think it is more important to try and help the students understand the context and want to wear poppies than to force it as a rule. I mean, I would expect families to have educated them on that where possible but the school should too. I would rather that remembrance and sacrifice were fully discussed than that poppies are worn without understanding. Personally I would not stop wearing a poppy as some sort of protest against the perceived pressure to wear one. This is bigger than that.

As I say I think how you feel is more important that just wearing something, but I am struggling to think why someone would have a deep aversion to wearing a poppy.

FeelingSmurfy · 05/11/2016 00:45

I would be asking why this is mandatory yet charity wristbands (I assume, as with most schools) are not only not forced, they are against uniform policy

MitzyLeFrouf · 05/11/2016 00:45

Poppy shaming is so tedious. Wear one, don't wear one. No explanation should be necessary either way.

Baylisiana · 05/11/2016 00:47

I think I may have missed something. WW1 was fought to resist pressure to wear a paper flower to remember those who died in past wars?

TaterTots · 05/11/2016 00:48

It's a symbol of remembrance. That's all it is. Nothing else. And quite frankly I''m pig sick of people making it in to something it's not.

Wear one or don't wear one it's up to you

Bit contradictory...

HappyAxolotl · 05/11/2016 00:50

I always put donations in the tins but don't take the poppy. Or I get a couple and put them in a vase. I can never get them to stay on my clothes. I have a wristband one that usually doesn't show under clothes and the last few years I've been collecting the pin brooch with the year on, but they leave holes in clothes so I put them on my curtain with all my other badges.

I believe in the symbol of remembrance and I believe in the work the RBL does, but I don't like people feeling (or in OP's child's case, BEING) forced to wear the poppy. Or the appropriation of the poppy by Britain First, a group the RBL has distanced itself from.

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