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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Trick or treaters letting themselves in

277 replies

Backaffyaspookybitch · 31/10/2016 18:41

First off, I've had a hard day so I might be slightly narky.

My DS has been ill all day - loaded with the cold and a temp of 39. I've just picked him up from my mum's (been at work all day) and trying to get him into a cool bath and get some calpol down down him. He's just miserable and my DH is working away.

I put him in the bath and I hear the door. I know it'll be trick or treaters but I can't leave my son in the bath (he's 2) so I decide to just ignore it and see if they come back later.

Oh no. The door opens and in walks the boy from next door whom I do know accompanied by 4 or 5 other children! Their mums are standing at the bottom of my garden shrieking with laughter and encouragement.

These children were standing in my hall way shouting and laughing Confused

I got my DS out the bath, ran down the stairs and I asked them to leave and closed the door.

I actually got a bit of a shock that they'd be so bold!

I never even gave them sweets Sad

WIBU to ask them to leave?

OP posts:
Shona52 · 01/11/2016 18:26

I would be fuming 😤 at this but when my he works away from home I got into the habit of licking our doors when I'm upstairs (I wood have switched the doorbell off too)

DiddysMammy · 01/11/2016 18:34

I'd have a word with your neighbour. That's ludicrous

Sparklyglitter · 01/11/2016 18:42

We have our door on the latch when we are home, very normal in our house, but no way would I expect someone to just walk in and think it's funny! My friends have opened door and called hello when I haven't heard them knocking at the door, which is fine.
But what your neighbours did is just not acceptable and is plain rude!
I would say I'm sorry if I appeared rude but you really took me by surprise and son was very sick. I didn't expect anyone to just walk into my house! Nicely of course and hope they realise how damn rude they were! Poor you!!!

JaimeLannister · 01/11/2016 18:46

It doesn't matter that the OP had the door unlocked. That is her choice.

The issue is the rude children and parents who felt their fun was more important than the op's privacy. Any child who opened my door and walked on in would be faced with my German Shepherd. Bet the parents wouldn't find that funny.

kali110 · 01/11/2016 18:54

Shona52 might want to be careful, licking those doors Grin

youarenotkiddingme · 01/11/2016 19:11

I have a lift and lock front door too. Probably the only reason I've never locked myself out!

I also leave it unlocked if DS out, going up and down. We live in a flat and have to be buzzed in from downstairs.

Yanbu. They shouldn't have walked in. It's rude and teach img the children nothing if the parents encouraged it.

waterlily200 · 01/11/2016 19:19

Willow2016 what safari Park thread?? Intrigued....

Also OP totally unacceptable, locked or not. I admit I am trying to relearn to lock my doors as only used to do it on an evening before bed as I had a German Shepherd so felt save enough and it was easier for letting him in and out for the loo. Now he's passed I'm working on remembering to turn the key!

chazf09 · 01/11/2016 19:19

I don't get the whole issue with leaving door unlocked either my door is only locked when am out in bed or in a bath when no one is in 😐 these kids were rude and their mothers were even worse laughing about it yanbu x

JaneAustinAllegro · 01/11/2016 19:24

God forbid a small child's evening enjoyment is diminished by being given some proper parenting and told not to barge into strangers' homes repeatedly...
Knaffed you do realise that it's not just an "embarrassment" for you, it's also a safety issue for your child (entirely leaving aside the gobsmackingly inappropriate behaviour which has been adequately covered above)

chazf09 · 01/11/2016 19:24

I don't have a yale lock 😐 plus my kids r in and out all day so pointless locking door to only open once ive sat down

bobgoblin23 · 01/11/2016 19:32

We were out last night and DS4 was knocking on doors, banging the door, ringing the bell where he could find one, and sometimes tried the door handle.

One house had a pull string where the door opened as we got to it, then someone jumped out to scare the kids. It was great, but encouraged DS to try door handles after that.

There was one house where the door opened when he tried the handle, and then their dog ran out! We had to chase down the street after the dog, get it back in the house then shut the door behind us. The owners did not stir...very weird.

previously1474907171 · 01/11/2016 19:33

I always lock doors/put chains on, we have 2 chains.

One day I left the door open while I went to fetch something to take out and within a few seconds I returned to find someone going through my bag.

A few months later I went to the door and saw a card sliding along to open the lock which I grabbed, unfortunately the person on the other side pulled harder than me and got away.

These days I lock the back door all the time I am elsewhere in the house because there is a chance that someone will get in via the gardens. The gardeners move from house to house via the back, sliding out a fence panel to get through with their machinery, however, not ours as we don't have that kind of fencing.

TheCatsMother99 · 01/11/2016 19:39

Just because your door is unlocked doesn't mean it's an open invite for people to come in... taking it to the extremes, that's like saying you should expect to be burgled and you're basically asking for it.

I almost always leave my door unlocked during the day if it's been unlocked that morning for any reason and I only have one friend who comes in without ringing the doorbell first but that's only because I'm expecting her and I have actually told her to let herself in. No one else, not even my closest friends would let themselves in otherwise.

CoraPirbright · 01/11/2016 19:45

I would be livid! Absolutely disgusting rudeness. I would be telling these laughing mums what I thought of them in no uncertain terms.

Shona52 · 01/11/2016 20:01

kali110 You got me 😂

itstimeforchange · 01/11/2016 21:42

Bobgoglin I'm confused, why were you encouraging your child to try door handles?!

We don't lock our door when we're in, except at night. If I'm home alone with the kids and am going upstairs with them I sometimes do to make myself feel safe, but otherwise it's just not practical due to no yale lock. (More danger of locking myself out with those than being burgled, I always think!) Also live in a fairly safe rural area.

erchissick · 01/11/2016 21:54

Why wasn't your door locked?

WiddlinDiddlin · 01/11/2016 22:10

Jeez people, all this 'why wasnt your door locked' shit - its victim blaming like 'well you shouldn't have gone out in a short skirt and got drunk if you didn't want raping'.

People should not walk into other peoples homes uninvited.

They definitely should not encourage their children to do so.

It is not funny.

The fact the OP's door wasn't locked is not bloody relevant to the rudeness and inconsiderateness of these parents. It is their job to behave responsibly and teach their children manners.

Tapandgo · 01/11/2016 22:27

widdlin - totally agree. Serious weirdos on here teaching their kids the wrong way to behave - and as for trying the handles of strangers doors - what? Crass behaviour.

MrsStott · 01/11/2016 22:35

I'd have taken a cattle prodder to them, cheeky sods!

Willow2016 · 01/11/2016 22:37

waterlilly - 'dicks at safari park' mental!

Bobgoblin wtaf was your child doing trying peoples door handles?

Why were you letting them? Why didnt you tell them it wasnt ok to try to go into someones house? (even after the 'joke' house) Its just sheer luck that the dog ran away and didnt actually attack your child. What the hell would you have done then?

I dont believe how irresponsible some parents are no wonder kids think they can do as they please without repurcussions.

I know what I would have told you if he had tried to come in my house uninvited!

I dont lock my door until the evening (unless I am in the shower or something like that in the morning after kids go to school) during the summer when its daylight until late its open longer than now when it gets dark quicker. Probably due to the area I live in, if I lived in the city it would probably be different.

YoHoHoandabottleofTequila · 01/11/2016 22:48

I lock my door because I don't want either of my small DC to get out.

My parents never lock their door when they're in, they live in a rural village.

FrancisCrawford · 01/11/2016 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Scrumptiousbears · 01/11/2016 23:07

It's not victim blaming to ask why the door wasn't locked. It's pointing out that the person coming in could have been anyone. Yes those kids were bang out of order and I'd be livid but I'd be far more worried that it could have been a lot worse. If I had a door that could be opened from the outside. By force if habit the first thing I'd do it lock it.

Horsepower9 · 01/11/2016 23:32

Does your neighbours son always just walk walk in? If so he probably didn't know he was doing anything wrong and probably got a shock himself when asked to leave.

I took my DD trick or treating for first time in our village with the other kids and they were all over excited running from house to house but none of them went in without being invited.

I would have asked them to wait outside but still given them sweets. There just excited children at the end of the daySmile
I hope your son better Flowers

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