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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To keep dd off school for the day for this?

67 replies

NapQueen · 30/10/2016 23:58

Aged 4, in Reception, and ages ago I'd booked tickets for us for a ballet performance at the theatre. It's aimed at you get kids and quite short. However the only day it was on is a Friday term time.

Will the teacher be pissed off if I keep her off? I don't want to lie but I also don't want any Ill feeling.

I could take her for registration but then would need to collect her at 10 am anyways.

OP posts:
DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 31/10/2016 00:00

They won't authorise the day off so you'll have to say they're sick or family emergency or something.

NickiFury · 31/10/2016 00:02

I'd call her in sick. She's four, she won't be missing much.

holidaysaregreat · 31/10/2016 00:03

Reception is still classed as early years and is not obligatory. Don't quote me on this tho!

heatherwithapee · 31/10/2016 00:04

She's not compulsory school age until the term after she turns 5 (at least that's the case in England, not sure for rest of UK) so I wouldn't worry about it.

BackforGood · 31/10/2016 00:05

You'll get a mixed response.
I wouldn't, personally. I think once a dc is at school, then they need to understand that's what they do on a school day, and wouldn't book tickets for a day they were at school.
I realise missing one day won't hurt her (although if they are doing something exciting that day she might be upset to miss it).
However, as you've already booked the tickets, I'm not sure why you are asking - you've done it anyway, so clearly feel you aren't.

BastardGoDarkly · 31/10/2016 00:05

She's not required to be at school by law, so just tell them she won't be in.

Don't lie though, it's not fair on DD.

IMissGrannyW · 31/10/2016 00:06

children are legally obliged to attend school the term after they turn 5. Before this they are not. Tell them your child won't be in that day (so they don't worry and call you) and have a lovely day!

They won't hassle you when you're child is 4. They will later!

Original poster
NapQueen · 31/10/2016 00:06

I'm tempted to say "she has been bought tickets" which she has, but in the manner of "grrrrrr these silly grandparents obviously didn't realise she was at school!"

OP posts:
AndNowItsSeven · 31/10/2016 00:06

It's not up to the teacher, your dd is not compulsory school age.

PopGoesTheWeaz · 31/10/2016 00:06

sounds lovely, not compulsory for under 5s plus sounds like a wonderful way to spend the day with your child

Selfimproved · 31/10/2016 00:07

Depends on the teacher / school / area. Unless you are confident they will say yes, I wouldn't ask. Just go and apologise if they complain afterwards.

Original poster
NapQueen · 31/10/2016 00:08

She has a younger brother who will be at the childminders that day, so I'd like to add in lunch and a little trip to see santa too. I really think she will have a lovely day, I just don't want to annoy her teacher (who is really wonderful).

OP posts:
HerRoyalNotness · 31/10/2016 00:24

Just do it and tell the teacher where you're going. It's a nice cultural experience for her. If it's an absence, who cares?

UsernameHistory · 31/10/2016 00:28

It sounds nice but think about the example you're setting your daughter: go to school unless there's something better to do.

I wouldn't.

Original poster
NapQueen · 31/10/2016 00:30

Username not quite. She is 4. It is a Friday. She won't even know it's a Friday really. She won't know that she is "supposed" to be at school.

Thursday night - right that's it, for the weekend.

OP posts:
UsernameHistory · 31/10/2016 00:33

Fine.

Would you do it next year? The year after. I bet you will.

MorticiaCropleysCookbook · 31/10/2016 00:34

children are legally obliged to attend school the term after they turn 5.

No, they're not. It's a legal obligation for parents to make sure their child is receiving a full-time education, whether at school or at home.

Original poster
NapQueen · 31/10/2016 00:35

Next year she will be old enough to sit through a full ballet performance rather than a kids one, so I will have the range of dates and times available and no need to book it term time.

OP posts:
UsernameHistory · 31/10/2016 00:37

But I'm sure you'll find something else Napqueen.

As others have said, you aren't breaking any laws: I just know that I wouldn't.

BananaInPyjama · 31/10/2016 00:38

In Australia, it is common for kids to miss days off school and even weeks.

So far none have turned into zombies, unemployed losers, or unable to read and write as they have missed on average 5-10days of school per year. Nor is it disruptive to other kids. They slot back in very easily.

Age 4 they are still babies. It will not wreck her schooling. Go and enjoy would be my take.

Bue · 31/10/2016 00:38

Username so what if she does do it every year? It's ONE day and it's a nice cultural experience for her DD.

OP just inform the school that your DD won't be in that day. As others have said she is not compulsory school age yet. I highly doubt her teacher will care or be inconvenienced.

normage · 31/10/2016 00:41

Sounds lovely! These types of experience are such an important part of a young child's education. As pp have mentioned, school isn't even compulsory for your dd. I wouldn't lie. Your daughter could well talk about her lovely day out!

Frestelli · 31/10/2016 00:41

Bloody hell Username Grin you've not got a rod painfully inserted up your backside have you? Confused

EveOnline2016 · 31/10/2016 00:43

My DC gets upset when the attendance certificates and prizes for attendance are done.

Would your dd get upset knowing that's she hasn't missed school yet don't get rewarded.

isthatmorelego · 31/10/2016 00:49

Just take her education is about more than just what they learn in school . Let's be honest leading up to Xmas they have the poor kids practising for concert and at 4 she is playing most of the time .

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