To tell this bride to go swivel?!

[Badger84]

A friend of a friend is getting married and she had asked me to do her makeup as a favour. I am not a MUA but I enjoy hair and makeup and have a huge selection of makeup. I was shocked but agreed when I highlighted the point that I am not professional and she was happy with that.

5 makeup trials later and we have come to the understanding that she has unrealistic expectations of what I can provide. Her SIL has been at each of these trials and completely picked apart what I have done. The brides style is quite errr alternative (think gothic) so I've found it incredibly hard to recreate the look she wants. We finally came to a compromise and the bride was happy.

We went to the hen do previous weekend and the SIL kept making comments about makeup. Today I have received a message from the bride basically saying if I didn't want to do the makeup then I didn't have to 🤔

Not sure how to reply? AIBU to be annoyed that I have spent over 5 hours with the bride, using my makeup FOR FREE and now she is essentially ditching me. The wedding is next week! My DH says I should be relieved but I can't help but feel really annoyed!

[MrsJamin]

Who else is desperate to see how she does her make up on the day?!

[RTKangaMummy]

Well her and her SIL are real C*Ws aren't they?

I would go to wedding with beautiful make up on yourself and deffo do NOT give a pressie you have already done/given the pressie of your time and make up

Deffo do NOT help her or SIL ever again and deffo NOT on wedding day

[PaulDacresConscience]

I'd be so tempted to send Only1's message because it is so perfectly bitchy

However she sounds like a tenacious sort and things like this usually end up descending into a tit for tat slanging match, which won't make you feel better. So I'd sit on your hands and not reply.

Go to the wedding, make sure your make-up is perfect. Take a card only and if she asks what gift you're giving, smile sweetly and remind her that you gave her 5 hours of free MUA time for free. Then glide away and eat your own bodyweight from the buffet...

[peanut2017]

Relieved! She is cheeky expecting you to do all that for free knowing that you are not qualified. Let her be someone else's problem

[dingdongdigeridoo]

Tell her to go to poundland and pick up some halloween makeup for that authentic goth look.

[NatalieRushman]

Please turn up to the wedding. I think we all want to know how her makeup ends up looking on the day.

Also, make sure you don't answer any calls and avoid the SIL on the day. You don't want to be roped into doing makeup for her when she realises that maybe she doesn't want to do it herself anymore. If she asks, just decline sweetly - "Oh no, I couldn't possibly risk ruining your makeup. I mean, I know how much you a hate my style."

[2kids2dogsnosense]

Please turn up to the wedding. I think we all want to know how her makeup ends up looking on the day.

I certainly do - see if you can get a very unflattering picture.


Don't suppose you took any when you were trying stuff out? (You could stick a black patch over her eyes for anonymity, like they do for people with Really Unpleasant Diseases in medical textbooks)

[mickeysminnie]

Just say, "I was happy to help and glad it helped crystallize the style you want."
As someone else said those texts seem like they are trying to goad you into saying something so I would rise above it. If you do feel the need to say something, ring her don't leave a written trail for her to manipulate.

[ssd]

suppose " hope it fucking rains " is a step too far?

[FionaGatwick]

Maybe she's stressed and taking it out on you.

I'd be the bigger person and say what mickeysminnie said. However, I probably won't go to the wedding because the Netflix idea is more attractive to me!

[Stormtreader]

Surely the time for her to say "im more a fan of the natural look" was after the first trial look, not a week after you spent 5 hours doing makeup for free!

[slinkysaluki]

Tell her to get her SIL to do her make up as she seems to be an expert

[mimishimmi]

They asked you because you are not a professional - there's no way a MUA would agree to 5 trials unless the former ones had been paid for. I suspect she planned to ditch you once she hot the look she wanted anyway - saves her the cost of trials. You've had a lucky escape and might find it hard to get a good one who is not booked now.

[Rainbunny]

Well she's incredibly rude and you've dodged a bullet, really! Imagine if you did do her makeup on the day - she will come back to you and have complaints I guarantee and likely later blame you for "ruining" her wedding day. It's obvious that she doesn't know what she actually wants or how to communicate it or how to achieve it, so you'll come in for the blame if you keep trying to please her.

As for "preferring a more natural look..." I must admit I've never heard of a natural "gothic" look before!

As others have said, go to the wedding looking fabulous in your own makeup and DO NOT be on hand to help finish/touch her makeup up - whatever "help" you give will come back to haunt you! I speak form experience, I have a family member who begged favours from many people when she got married (makeup, hair, flowers, alterations etc...) and criticised everything that was done for her without showing an ounce of gratitude.

[user1471545174]

She's just been using you for the free tuition and now thinks she can handle it herself. So you definitely are not available for any more freebies and certainly not for panicked cries on the day of the wedding. Phone off.

Turn up and if she looks fabulous you can tell everyone you taught her the technique and hand out your card

No present. She won't ask. Eat, drink and be merry, then dump her without another word. Don't be drawn by SIL into any comments at all about her.

[Molly333]

As a long serving hairdresser and make up artist I stopped doing weddings and proms years ago - unrealistic is utterly right , make up won't change face structure !

[emmyhNL]

Astounding that she behaved like that. Definitely dodged a bullet there!

[StealthPolarBear]

What a cheek! Presumably you were trowelling the make up on as that's what she wanted?

[JustSpeakSense]

When she said you don't have to do her make up if you 'don't want to' what did she mean?

What have you said to her, or sip that has given her the impression 'you don't want to' do it. It sounds like you have said something to upset her?

[JustSpeakSense]

*sil
(Not sip!)

[BoboBunnyH0p]

From experience (I assist a wedding photographer) I can certainly see you getting a panicked phone call on the morning of the wedding, so phone off. I bet she is running late.
I would still attend the wedding (do report back) but I agree no need to give a gift.

[altiara]

In response to the wasting time comment I would've written "don't worry Hun, i can bill you for all of those hours and makeup I used so no need to worry, just enjoy your special day xx"

[altiara]

I kno you all love a Hun

[FaithAscending]

I would send a 'voucher' in her card for 5 hours of your time trialling makeup and mark it 'redeemed in full' and cope of Is it cos I'm cool by Mousse T, given her copy cat tendencies.

Definitely turn your phone off for the wedding. I wouldn't blame you for sacking off the wedding. What a cow!