To not want my stepdad to write a book about my son?

[NoCapes]

Weird one

My Mum recently told me that my Stepdad is writing a book, so the next time I saw him naturally I asked him what kind of book it was/what it was about
He told me it was about a little boy called and magical adventures he goes on through play basically
Then as he goes on it transpires that he's using real life situations/stories/things that have actually happened, in the book - some things that my Stepdad wasn't even there when they happened and only knows about them because I or ExP have told him about

Now I feel really wierd about this, I kind of feel like it's a bit of an invasion of privacy; they are our family stories and memories and I don't want them in a bloody book
I'm not on social media and I don't like when others put things about my kids on social media, so I'm not sure why he thinks writing a book about them would be appropriate
Surely if anyone was going to write a book about a child it should be the parents? Or he should've got our permission or something?
Also, I've got 3 children, and my brother has children, yet this book is solely about Ds1 - I find that a bit weird too

I don't know if I'm being weird and precious (I'm sure you'll all tell me ) and I know realistically only a handful of people are probably going to read this book but still, the whole thing just feels...weird to me, I just don't like it or really want it to happen
AIBU?

Just to clear up, he is my stepdad but he's very much the DC's Grandad, he's been around since about 5 years before my eldest was born
He's the only Grandad they've ever known
There is no concern about their relationship at all

OP several people seem to be ignoring your original question which was about privacy, not copyright.

The United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child (article 16) says that children are entitled to privacy:

This is the official wording: www.unicef.org.uk/Documents/Publication-pdfs/UNCRC_PRESS200910web.pdf:

"Article 16
1.No child shall be subjected to arbitrary or unlawful interference
with his or her privacy, family, home or correspondence, nor to unlawful attacks on his or her honour and reputation.
2.The child has the right to the protection of the law against such interference or attacks. "

I don't know how children's 'privacy' or 'honour and reputation' have been interpreted in UK law, but if you are really concerned, organisations such as the Coram Children's Legal Centre (a charity), or the Childrens Rights Alliance for England might perhaps be able to tell you.
Both have good websites:

www.lawstuff.org.uk/the-facts/what-are-childrens-rights

www.crae.org.uk/childrens-rights-the-law/

Seriously? Talk about mountains and molehills? You're suggesting the EU court of human rights?

No, I am not, and there is nothing in my post to suggest that I am.

The OP asked whether her stepfather needed her permission to publish private and personal information about her son (a minor in her care), and indicated that she felt that his intention to publish was 'a bit of an invasion of privacy'.

I interpreted her post as asking for information, as well as for the opinions of other Mumsnetters.

I supplied some basic legal information. That is all.

If you read my post:

1. You will see that I mentioned 'interpretation in UK law'; no other jurisdiction was mentioned (although many of the UN Convention provisions have in fact been implemented via English laws)*

2.You will see that I said 'if...really concerned', implying that the OP might well not want to take her worries any further.

1. You will see that I suggested NOT that the OP contact a solicitor with a view to taking legal action but INSTEAD that she might perhaps want to contact one of two (for example) organisations that specialise in giving information about children's legal rights, and/or that she might find their websites of interest.

Let's keep this real.

• www.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/296368/uncrc_how_legislation_underpins_implementation_in_england_march_2010.pdf

Keeping it real tells you that he can self publish a kids book based on whoever the fuck he likes and your silly interpretations don't come into it.

Have you read the Kate Atkinson books where Teddy's aunt writes books loosely based on him and he's awfully embarrassed as a boy. Perhaps that could be your starting point capes to discuss how ds might feel at being a boy in print?

There is a way to stop him, but it will possibly result in a family falling out:
If you can write down the story first, maybe publish them on a blog or just print it out and keep a copy which is clearly dated, then you will hold the copyright to stories. Obviously you would need to make sure that the stories are close enough to work your father-in-law plans to write, so they are instantly recognisable as the exact same stories.

However, this it Is likely to result in a lot of family drama, as it will probably be quite obviously you're only writing the stories to stop your father-in-law publishing them if you have never indicated that you wanted to write them before!

I'm sorry, but abuse is no substitute for reasoned argument or accurate information.

Here is a quote from an article in the UK Press Gazette Feb 2016, written by someone from a very senior firm of UK lawyers:

"In the meantime, journalists and editors should take extra care before mining and publishing what may in fact amount to children’s private information, in particular photographs. Watch out for privacy settings and ask yourself whether publication is really necessary. Beware however of instigating contact with children, which may in itself be intrusive. Ultimately, don’t assume that children’s clear rights to privacy can be ignored."

www.pressgazette.co.uk/pictures-privacy-and-facebook-journalists-should-not-assume-childrens-rights-can-be-ignored/

Here is similar advice re privacy for the USA:
www.dmlp.org/legal-guide/publishing-personal-and-private-information

Even the much-maligned IPSO UK press watchdog body warns, in its Code of Practice (2016):

"2. *Privacy

i) Everyone is entitled to respect for his or her private and family life, home, health and correspondence, including digital communications.

ii) Editors will be expected to justify intrusions into any individual's private life without consent. ..."

www.ipso.co.uk/editors-code-of-practice/

I am not suggesting in any way, shape or form that the OP might want to enforce the above guidelines when it comes to her stepfather's planned publication. .
But those guidelines do exist, and, if implemented, they do offer a child - or adult - some degree of privacy protection.

Finally - every single publisher's contract I've ever seen asks the author to 'warrant' that 'the work is in no way objectionable' and to 'indemnify' the publishers against any damages should the work turn out to be so. It's a risk to sign such a contract without checking that a book's text conforms to the current legal position.

Which has interesting implications for self published "authors", I guess.

I still feel OP has to have a frank conversation with step-dad to find out what he thinks he's doing. Just what is going on in his mind? In OP's place, I'd feel better if I at least knew the rationale.

Got to admit, my step mother was around a couple of decades before I had kids - but the kids don't regard her as 'Grandma' even if they called her that for years (Didn't want to upset my dad). Now my dad's gone they call her - if they refer to her at all - by her given name.

You seem to be projecting your own issues with step family members onto this thread, Joffrey.