Aibu that Halloween is begging?

[TopangaD]

Ok do I start this post with a childhood disclaimer, we never went guising as children which is what we call it in Scotland as my mother felt it was begging.. prob cos the old tradition was to do a turn ( I.e. Do a performance in some sort and ask for £).. so I see on a local parenting site a query from an American asking where in the city I'm from there are American style or friendly dot to door things for Halloween for her snowflake's first Halloween Ainu to say if you want you own traditions Cool but don't expect them to exist here ... I think her post and the way she assumed that American cultre would be repropriated annoyed me..

,chesty I don't particularly like American style trick or treating, but it is probably harmless enough when parents are supervising very young children, but what you've described and was far more common where I grew up was gangs of teenage lads in trackies knocking on doors for money with the Clea implication they'd fuck your house up if you didn't give them the cash. It was demanding money with menaces pure and simple.

You haven't even managed to be the first poster this year to ask this repetitive boring question OP.
Of course accepting sweets from people who are offering them is not begging. From many years on here, and my own experience with children, it seems that in the vast majority of cases that this is one night of fun. Round here - and most places if what I've seen on here is fair - if you put out a pumpkin people knock for sweets. If you don't put out a pumpkin, nobody bothers you.
If you don't want to get involved just don't. Nobody is making you.

I think most people go over the top with Christmas presents but I don't worry about it, I just do things my way. Surely this is the same?

Do I win the award for first trick or treaters? Two young children just knocked on the door!
It is the 22nd today isn't it

I hate answering the door to strangers. Halloween is an evening for sitting in my home with the lights off watching a DVD and refusing to answer the door

And I don't hate Christmas but I tend not to answer the door to carol singers either. It isn't so much Bah Humbug as I get socially anxious and i like my own privacy. As they say My home is my castle. A castle is a fortress and I like to snuggle down in mine undisturbed.

YANBU I hate it! Its an awful American tradition of beg or threat.

It seems to have died down a bit in the last few years (or maybe the weather has been bad) but it was dreadful around our way at one point. Its not helped by the fact that we are in a nice area which is within walking distance of an area where quite a few problematic families have been dumped relocated to.

When our kids were young we did try to play along, albeit we didn't take ours out, but the rudeness of some of the kids and their parents was atrocious. One year with 2 youngsters and 1 income we were having to be quite careful with money but still managed to buy a few packs of assorted fun size chocolate bars. We asked kids to take one or there wouldn't be enough to go around but total strangers were letting their kids grab handfuls or telling us that maybe we should have bought more, or that we were mean or cheap. Then there were the parents puffing away on our doorstep; I don't smoke, I don't want people to smoke in my open doorway and the constant knocks at the door until well after 9 made the dogs anxious and wound up. So we stopped doing it and now put a note on the door saying no Trick or Treaters but still some people bang on the door.

Then there are the feral teenagers who see Halloween as an excuse to play up. Treating vandalism as a trick, scaring and intimidating people, we've even had a bunch of them pitch up on our doorstep a week before Halloween wearing hoodies and horror masks and quite frankly it's a disturbing sight to be met with. I fully expect the killer clowns to be out in force this year.

I'm not a big fan, but it's huge round here and I'm not mean enough not to let my kids participate. Plus there are a couple of houses also handing out prosecco for adults! All very civilised!

Strange, I thought I was offering the sweets. I say "Wow you look scary, would you like sweet?". Nobody has ever knocked and asked for a sweet.

I grew up in Scotland, now live in England and have lived in America. When I lived in Scotland it was pretty much a non-event except for parties at school etc. when I was a kid and we dressed up and played games.

In America, it was actually rather cute. There was no asking for money. In my neighbourhood, you would see little groups of young children dressed up in great little costumes going around trick or treating with some parents in tow. As far as my experience of it was, it was quite charming, people generally got involved and made it fun; it was a simple case of sweets/candy being OFFERED out as a "reward" for the kids' costumes. That's how I saw it - as did many of my neighbours. It was light hearted fun and frankly, there's so much negativity in the world these days, handing out a few sweets to a VERY little and VERY cute ghost and her friends put a smile on my face! I actually looked forward to it - some of the kids were adorable and they were always polite when they came to my door. None of them ever ASKED for sweets, money or anything. I would comment on how great their costumes were, enjoy a bit of fun with them, and then offer them some sweets, which they would politely thank me for. I always found it quite charming and fun.

It was an unwritten rule that if you had your porch light on, it was okay for kids to come to the door. If your porch light was off, then that person preferred not to participate, and the kids where I lived were very respectful of that.

When I returned to the UK, with the internet being what it is, many of the American ideas had come over here and now things like halloween decorations and much better costumes are seen around, along with pumpkin carving and the like. I rather like it. So if a few kids want to dress up and knock on my door, I have no objection to handing out a few sweets and indulging what is a bit of fun for kids! Jeez, there's surely enough to get down about - some kids dressed up in funny/cute/silly costumes is the least of my worries.

I'll be getting stocked up this week - if any kids come to my door in costumes they'll get rewarded with some sweets. If they don't... well, plenty sweets left over for Xmas... and for me! :-)

But it's not begging. By putting out a pumpkin and putting up some visible decorations I am I voting the neighbourhood children to come and knock on my door. I never went guising as a child we were allowed and my siblings did I just didn't enjoy it. Ds1 doesn't either but does love getting dressed up and helping me hand out sweets. I love seeing the costumes and the kids of all ages. We get teens around here too but they all make an effort not just a 50p mask and a bin bag and they do it u till they are around 15/16 in our wee village and nobody comes after 8pm and they only go to decorated houses.
It's a bit of fun as the nights start getting darker.

I dont mind it, a lot of younger kids get dressed up and enjoy it. The outfit seems to be the "turn", we get kids dressed as witches, zombies, cats, one boy last year did a pretty impressive Frankenstein (complete with actions as I opened the door).
We do get teens but they dress up and they seem ok with sweets.
Its a sort of rule in my area that you have a candle or pumpkin outside, to indicate you welcome trick or treaters. I dont do this but still get some.

Our village/close has a real community vibe on Halloween. Lots of littlies going round with their parents, and only knocking on decorated places (of which there are many). Only time I ever see half of em!

A couple of years ago I started putting lots carved pumpkins out (I just enjoyed carving them) - my house now seems to be a 'thing' with repeat visitors each year to see what this year's designs are. Not sure how to stop it tbh, so now i have 8 ready and waiting for their designs, and a kitchen full of poundland sweets

I hate people knocking on my door, really hate it. BUT, that doesn't mean I'm going to pass a law stopping anyone else from doing it. As it happens we're never home on Halloween anyway as we have a family party but I always leave sweets out. It's one night and they're just kids, that's all.

look at you, upset about Halloween of all things

I guarantee that American dame has never nor will ever think of you

Maybe take up quilting to keep busy instead, perhaps it will bring you peace

You haven't even managed to be the first poster this year to ask this repetitive boring question OP.

Not half as boring as people who [adopts John Major voice] 'I've checked my records and I think you'll find Halloween was discussed in October 2003, please refrain from revisiting it'

MN please can we have a topic for 'Tell Me Exactly What I Want to Hear' or alternatively 'Agree With Me at All Costs'

apparently it's necessary

Oh ffs Halloween isn't an American invention.

And the I have never ever had kids at the door actually asking for sweets never mind money. Never given money at all.

No Willow, but in its current form it borrows heavily from American customs in the way it is celebrated. Pumpkins weren't imported into Europe until the c19th. Likewise Trick or Treat as opposed to Guising or mumming is an American import.

I like it although always have to point out to people that it isn't fucking American!

www.irish-genealogy-toolkit.com/origin-of-Halloween.html

Yep but pumpkins are way easier to carve than neeps!

No Willow, but in its current form it borrows heavily from American customs in the way it is celebrated. Pumpkins weren't imported into Europe until the c19th. Likewise Trick or Treat as opposed to Guising or mumming is an American import.

The horror, the horror!

I assume those who are so against the latest changes to old traditions and refuse foreign imports won't be putting up any Christmas trees?

OP, I sincerely hope your little snowflakes are not looking forward to decorating any tree for Christmas, have no Santa and get no presents. You should remind them instead that repropriating foreign cultures is unacceptable and inappropriate.

I welcome pumpkins. It was a turnip when I was a kid, pumpkins were unheard of, but unsurprisingly readily assimilated. ( anyone who has tried to carve a turnip will understand!)