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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want to rehome our bloody miserable cat?

149 replies

user1473509591 · 21/10/2016 18:25

Okay so he's 5, and he's just an awful, kid hating cat. It's not so bad during the summer, he's perfectly happy to spend days at a time sleeping outside and just coming home for food. But during winter, obviously, he wants to come in more. Now, my kids are 2 and 5 and are naturally curious. They're not rough (although my eldest used to be which is probably why he's quite cautious of kids now) but the kids just have to walk past him and they end up being scratched. Our house is tiny, we've set up a little bed at the top of the stairs separated by a gate for him but the stupid effing thing insists on trying to sleep in the living room, the busiest room in the house. I can't be sympathetic if he's going to be a bloody idiot. He cant sleep in our room because I'm mildly allergic to cat hair, and I don't want him in the kids room. I don't really know what to do with him, he really doesn't seem to suit a house with young children but whenever I even consider rehoming him it's met with outcry from family and friends. I had to give our dog to my mum when our daughter was about 9 months old because she would just pee everywhere and would nip and growl at my daughter when she started moving so I think they just think I'm crap with pets when in reality, the only reason why he's still here is because I won't give him to just anyone!

OP posts:
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PinkSparklyPussyCat · 21/10/2016 22:30

I wouldn't rehome an animal if I knew the animal was as good as dead

What do you mean by this? There are many rescues that don't PTS.

Kinder by far than a declawing operation

Declawing is illegal in the U.K. (and should be elsewhere)so thankfully that's not an option.

OP, I would definitely try Feliway and I think there's something else called Zylkine. It might also be worth posting in The Litter Tray.

TheNoodlesIncident · 21/10/2016 22:32

OP don't bother with Feliway - waste of money and will not make your cat stop scratching anyone

Cat tree or shelf up high where he can roost and keep an eye on you all is a better investment

CPL will help you with rehoming - they tend not to have space in their shelters but will advertise your cat on their site with a description and a pretty photo (he is quite handsome...) You continue with the cat until they find another owner

dementedma · 21/10/2016 22:34

You still have her skin to stroke???

Olinguito · 21/10/2016 22:39

When no-one is listening I call mine "Mummy's best puss" Blush

HelenaDove · 21/10/2016 22:43

Olin i call mine Mummys little precious.

MyPeriodFeatures · 21/10/2016 22:47

I remember a cat of mine actually attacking my friends four year old. It was terrifying. Pets and children are tricky, if the pets were there first it's never possible to know whether the animal will adjust.

MsJudgemental · 21/10/2016 22:50

Please rehome your cat somewhere he can be happy.

SleepFreeZone · 21/10/2016 22:54

My cats a dickhead. She has the run of the house and garden and yet she will continually plonk herself within arms reach of the 9 month old and of course he grabs her fur, tail etc and pulls. The amount of times I have to separate them and yet she will jump the stairgates to put herself in reach again. Most cats get out the way of children but not mine Hmm

user1471524661 · 21/10/2016 22:54

FFS. I feel so sorry for your cat. Look after him with love and realise what effect your attitude towards him will be having on his territorial behaviour. And stop buying pets until you can deal with the inconvenience.

user1473509591 · 21/10/2016 23:00

My attitude towards him? What attitude? Confused

OP posts:
MaddyHatter · 21/10/2016 23:02

mine are fatarse and dickhead, unless i'm being all soppy, then they're my Tubby Tabby Princess and The Handsomest Dude in the World..

Ptarmigandancinginthegloaming · 21/10/2016 23:13

Don't worry about user1471's comments OP, they clearly haven't rtft, as they think you bought the cat, and you've explained all that. People seem keen to judge u, but I can't really use anything you've done that's not reasonable, and you're clearly concerned, and have tried hard to balance the needs of ur DCs and the cat.
Fwiw, I'd try to rehome the cat so it can have a quiet home and be happy - even if u try all the things suggested, it's likely to create and uneasy truce, and if the cat took a swipe at ur 2 year old from a shelf or cat tree it could damage an eye - imo it's just not worth the risk.

CupofTeaTime · 21/10/2016 23:15

Oh my god, can't believe how hard a time OP is getting over this! I think she'd have got less abuse for saying she wanted to re-home her own kids! You are not BU OP, I have two cats which luckily are relaxed and don't mind being touched by my DS(4) however if they started to hurt him constantly I wouldn't think twice about re-homing them. Absolutely astonished at all of the responses on here when it's CHILDREN involved. It's a bloody cat at the end of the day. Ffs

Costacoffeeplease · 21/10/2016 23:23

It's a bloody cat at the end of the day. Ffs

Nice attitude. Very nice Hmm

InformalRoman · 21/10/2016 23:39

Oh yes, try Zylkene as well - you can get it online. Should help if the cat is anxious or stressed.

maddening · 21/10/2016 23:48

Put a feliway plug in and a radiator bed on the landing and a cat tower in the living room

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 22/10/2016 00:57

Ugh - why do stupid people get pets ?

Twofurrycats · 22/10/2016 01:21

My little fur ball pissed on the feliway diffuser

To want to rehome our bloody miserable cat?
toffee1000 · 22/10/2016 01:45

stopfuckingshouting Read the thread. OP did NOT "get" the cat, it was DUMPED on her by her father.
Good grief.

PoppyPicklesPenguin · 22/10/2016 02:21

They're not rough (although my eldest used to be which is probably why he's quite cautious of kids now

Well possibly the cat has remembered this

The OP also refers to him as stupid and an idiot, it doesn't take a genius to work out why some people think she has an attitude towards him

He's a cat doing cat things and if he is cautious because he has been "roughed" up in the past then he needs not to be living in that house anymore

And as others have said the OP really shouldn't have pets at all.

CanadaMoose · 22/10/2016 04:34

My uni roommate's cat liked to jump at me when I walked past and scratch and bite me. I never laid a hand on him and often played with him happily. Sometimes cats are just assholes even if you are an awesome pet owner.

I'm sure you are a great pet owner and a great mum. I hope everything is sorted out for you. Best case scenario? Cat gets a little space high up (shelf, climber) and lrarns to love the family. Good luck!

pugsake · 22/10/2016 05:02

DH won't get a cat, I call my dog a cowbag all the time (she answers to it as well) but she's great with the DC.

I think you've just been unlucky with pets. I wouldn't keep an animal that kept hurting my DD.

Cantusethatname · 22/10/2016 08:50

I call mine Baby Boy and Mummy's Boy! I was too embarrassed to write that until I saw what others had put!

IzzyIsBusy · 22/10/2016 08:53

I hope the excessive posts are not upsetting you OP.
People are very strange when it comes to pets especially cats.

Our cat Cato was with us from a kitten, was not teased by my children as they were older and was basically an assassin. Hence his name.
He used to love nothing more than diving from the bannister all claws out and landing on the head of which ever poor human was walking up the stairs.

He was not a nice cat. He was mean and he seem to enjoy being mean.

You inherited your pets and it sounds like you have done your best. That does not make you stupid. A bit soft maybe Wink but not a bad pet owner.

bumsexatthebingo · 22/10/2016 10:14

The cat doesn't sound aggressive to me. It jumped out because it thought your kids hand was a mouse! If you are going to let little kids play next to a cat that is practising hunting behaviour that will happen. Do you play with the cat op? Lots of play with fishing rod toys it can jump on, little mice it can chase will calm down the pouncing. This is likely the kind of play the cat was doing when it was outside more which is why it's only become a problem now it's getting colder. I know you had the cat dumped on you but if you know nothing about cats and you aren't going to teach your kids how to behave around it then you should have had your dad rehome it elsewhere. It's not just about teaching kids not to be rough it's about teaching them when a cat is playful and when a cat is calm and able to be stroked. Kids will also do things that aren't rough like pick up a resting cat which is likely to pee them off or follow it round trying to pet it when it's not in the mood.

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