Or are my neighbours complete IDIOTS 😂

[Lilianna123]

Another neighbourly dispute, same neighbours that claimed our cat was teasing their dog, and the same neighbours who accused us of stealing blackberries off their bush that happened to grow over my fence.

Well if I hadn't thought they were ridiculous before, I definitely do now.

Woke up this morning to find a note through the door saying they have had a new piano delivered and due to space they were limited on places it could go indoors (not our problem) they are saying where they have placed it is under a window and their view from the piano is a large oak tree which is in our garden. Their problem is that they are saying the many birds nests that are in this tree are distracting and these wild birds are making too much noise therefore distracting them from the piano.

There isn't even a suggestion in the note of what they'd like us to do about it. Not that I would even consider taking any action towards the tree but FFS what on earth are they doing? They don't have a bloody leg to stand on??

I'd write a note saying now they mention the piano you're glad you can identify the source of the racket as you'd yet to figure it out. say you prefer bird song and if they could minimise they're 'playing' that would be grand (piano) 😂 ffs daft feckers

Wow I don't know how you have managed to keep putting up with them.

If they weren't so obviously crazy I would post a note back complaining about the piano noise.

However, with this lot, I would do as PPs have suggested and get a ton of bird feeders!

MMmmkay.

Please, please, please dress up as big bird and sit in the tree.

Get a preservation order on the tree, just in case.

And a violin.

Get note, turn note over, write "unsubscribe" on note, put it back through their door

I'd reply saying that you have had a complaint from Cock Robin, who is the president of the noise abatement society round where you live. He says he can't hear himself tweet.

"I have asked the birds to quieten down".

I'd be ordering a drum kit.

This is brilliant! Just ignore op. But keep the note for giggles.

Give them some sales leaflets on double glazing and black-out blinds.

Some neighbours are just plain crazy

Suggest that they play the birdie song and teach the birds the routine...

Haha, that's priceless! Tell them to pop a copy of their sheet music through your door and you'll see if you can get the birds to sing along more harmoniously.

Oh, I'm sorry I have no ideas. I can hardly type for laughing. Thank you for cheering me up!

Tell them that your cat normally chases the birds away, but their dog has traumatised the cat so much that the cat is no longer capable of carrying out official duties.

Get a red sharpie pen and write

WHAT
THE
ACTUAL
FUCK?

Diagonally across the whole note and put it back through their door.

You could write 'maybe it'll scare them off when I get my drum kit to accompany your playing'

Wow! You can smell the crazy on them. I would print out the below, with no other comment and post it back though their door:

Under the Wildlife and Countryside Act (1981)

All birds, their nests and eggs are protected by law and it is thus an offence, with certain exceptions to:

intentionally kill, injure or take any wild bird
intentionally take, damage or destroy the nest of any wild bird whilst it is in use or being built
intentionally take or destroy the egg of any wild bird
have in one's possession or control any wild bird, dead or alive, or any part of a wild bird, which has been taken in contravention of the Act or the Protection of Birds Act 1954
have in one's possession or control any egg or part of an egg which has been taken in contravention of the Act or the Protection of Birds Act 1954
use traps or similar items to kill, injure or take wild birds
have in one's possession or control any bird of a species occurring on Schedule 4 of the Act unless registered, and in most cases ringed, in accordance with the Secretary of State's regulations (see Schedules)
intentionally or recklessly disturb any wild bird listed on Schedule 1 while it is nest building, or at a nest containing eggs or young, or disturb the dependent young of such a bird.

Write back asking if they are on glue.

get the kids on this and invite some friends around to sit in the tree.

Dear neighbour

I tweeted the birds about your concerns. They said they only want to help.

Write back and say "I've met for an informal meeting with the birds, who brought along a union representative. They are unwilling to change their working conditions. The next step is a formal disciplinary meeting, on X day at dawn. They wish to meet with you in the garden to discuss how to resolve this dispute to everyone's mutual satisfaction."

You need to encourage and culture the crazy.

Then write a book titled "letters from my mad neighbours"

Write a note back: As you're quite clearly cuckoo, perhaps you'd like to have a word with the birds yourselves. I'm sure they'll be reasonable and relocate to another tree immediately.