If you get up early for work and you have young Dc.....

[StrongTeaHotShower]

Does your partner get up to take care of dc whilst you get ready or do they stay in bed till you've gone?

I do shift work so am up between 5:30 - 6:00 am and this mostly coincides with dd's 2yrs waking. She will need usual morning care as in night nappy off help to toilet, demands for milk and breakfast and for books on the sofa. I have a small amount of time to get ready and wish my partner would get up and tend to her but he stays in bed till I go (He says he gets up as soon as I'm gone so I have to take his word for it).
I've asked him to help out so I'm not late but he's not changed a thing.
AIBU to expect this especially as he work late?

Livingonthedancefloor - well...currently middle DC shares a room with eldest DC. She used to be too scared to go downstairs alone so would insist on staying in our room watching iPlayer at bottom of our bed until I caved in and got up. In the last sixish mths she's got over this and now happily goes down and turns tv on and sits watching programmes for 20 ish mins til she gets bored and comes to stare at me for a bit and/or wake me then returns to watch tv again. She's very loud by nature so it's taken a great deal of work to drill it in to lower the vocal volume but everyone's up and guaranteed several times a week she'll crash around and shout and someone.

My eldest is different kettle of fish - quiet, sleeps later, amuse herself longer without interacting with me. My middle me has always needed to 'check on me' every ten or so mins then resumes what she is doing.

If they didn't share a room middle DC would happily play there but again would be noisy and wake everyone at some point! When younger she will have refused to be on own in room

Ok, I see. Mine are still in cots and too young to be left on their own in the living room. It gives me ideas for the future, thanks!

Yes I have to agree that some children can be sleep trained and some can't. Mine cannot. Not when she was a waking all night baby and not now she's a early riser. She is full of beans and raring to go.

Livingonthedancefloor- you could well find it quite amazing as you have two individuals who are very in tune in some ways but very different in others. I certainly have been taught to stop making assumptions about 'all children can be taught to have the same outcomes' as both mine have had same parents, values and expectations, the same strategies and so on yet are both completely different in how they respond and what is reasonable to expect from them. It's definitely one of those nature versus nurture perspectives!

I'd suggest as you encounter stuff to research what works for others (I did with the sleep issue), try it then take stock. We've eventually found a happy ground but it's taken a while and to be honest only occurred once middle DC got old enough to adopt more independent solutions and even then I'm not overly happy with her being downstairs alone while I'm asleep so I avoid where possible.

What - at 7 years I would expect them to be able to entertain themselves though even if they do wake early. If he wakes at 6am, I would say 6-7.30am he can read in bed, or get him a desk in bedroom and lamp, and he can draw pictures etc. It's not saying he has to sleep longer than 6am, but it is saying he shouldn't disturb others at that time
Ds1 is 6 years, he woke around 8.30am. But he's then spend the last 2 hours drawing and writing comic strips, helping himself to a banana and some milk, and we have barely heard from him. Ds2 (5) sKept until 9am and has been playing alone with figures an hour. Of course as it's later Dh and I have been awake and showering etc also but they defiantly can happily entertain themselves and hour or two, and before 7.30am they would definitely have to.

For smaller children, I recommend ditching the cot, and putting mattress on the floor. They adding stairgate to their bedroom door. Leave some quiet toys accessible in their room like teddies, board books, play figures. They can then get up themselves from young and play a little bit themselves without having to shout for someone to get them out

No child is allowed to get up & go downstairs until at least 6.30 in our house! They can be awake and watch tv/iPad in our bed but that's it. I think eating breakfast too early can reinforce early wakings too. The body starts to expect food at that time in the morning. Mine aren't allowed to eat before 7am.

Sure, but does it matter if he plays wii at 6am-8am or at 4-6pm? Just allow the 2hrs earlier. Yes he might have additional needs, but imo they need to be allowed to do some stuff alone and learn as eventually they will need to do things alone. At 15 years he will likely be the same, and what about at 20 years? Yes it's not ideal, but if his worse is playing too much screens and eating some biscuits before breakfast, I would probably go with that if it allows him to safely occupy himself, and you to get an extra hour sleep, rest, or just time to shower knowing he's fine.

Maybe bribing with 6-6.15am is drawing time, then 6.15-7.15am he's allowed to use a screen and eat 2 biscuits ( leave two out especially for him). Leave a visual timetable if that works for him. Once that habit is ingrained, you can try and move it 15 mins later gradually

art this sounds great, possibly hard to achieve with two small children but only one early riser but I like the idea...

Sorry for the highjack OP