To have got DS only 1 present for his birthday?

[AllenKey]

DS turned 8 yesterday. We took him to see a film and then went out for dinner. His party is this Saturday.

He had a list of about 5 things. It came to a total of about £250. If I'm being honest, that's just too much - we wouldn't pay that much for 5 things.

However, we purchased his top wanted one.

He was happy about it, but seemed a bit sad about the lack of presents. I told him that he would get more on Saturday (from friends and family, etc.) and he was fine about it.

I was in work today and work colleague asked what I got him, I told them and they asked what else...

I now feel really mean about it

I very nearly only got my 5 yo one thing from me and her dad. In the end I saw something she had asked for that i didn't think I would have found, for 2.50 and decided to go with it! She also got a small gift from her brother (he's younger, so obv I paid!) a massive gift from grandparents (bike), several bits from great grandparents and other grandparents (chosen and wrapped by me and her dad) plus she had a party for schoolfriends, and several guests put cash in an envelope. So despite her 2 presents from mum and dad coming to around a tenner, when considered in its entirety, there is no way she was hard done by. If grandparents weren't very keen to buy the bike, we would have, or would have clubbed together the money from others to do so. Next year the bike buying grandparents probably won't spend so much, we might spend differently.
As a kid we got a present, if it was small we got a couple of extras, but it wasn't on the scale of Christmas.

If you had booked the party for before his birthday,then kept the presents to open on his birthday.he would of had them all on same day

Thread about why we are all buying too much "stuff"

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2745053-To-think-that-buying-stuff-is-getting-out-of-hand

I would normally get my boys a few things to open but that's because they don't normally have parties and we have no grandparents left so they only get from us, my sister and a family friend.

I genuinely did not know this was a thing. I thought lots of little extras was a Christmas Stocking tradition, nothing to do with birthdays. My DDs always get one birthday present and have never seemed to expect anything else. They are often quite inexpensive (although there have been a few bigger ones) but always chosen with love, care and due attention to pre-birthday hints. It makes me quire sad to think that for some children the quality/enjoyment of a birthday might be spoiled by not getting lots of extra gifts.

I think I would have thrown a couple of cheap things from Poundland into the mix, just to give him a few things to open on his actual birthday.

Having said that, he got one big present, a meal, a film and a party at the weekend. Hardly a contender for Childline.

I used to get masses and masses of presents as a child. But the year I turned 11, I only got one birthday present due to the expense - an 8 week old German Shepherd puppy. That one present remains engraved on my heart forever.

I think it's down to personal choice what we do/don't do for our kids birthdays. I get a bit at people getting all shouty and telling everyone else they're ridiculous for not doing it their way.

Children aren't spoiled or grabby just because their parents choose to buy them more than one gift - sanctimonious twaddle.

People buy according to their budget and their own views, what someone else chooses to do is none of anyone else's business.

The OP has chosen to canvas opinion/collect views on what other people do, that doesn't mean it's open season to tell everyone else on the thread that their children are grabby because they get more than one gift or that one gift buyers are mean or that buying more than one thing means we are ruing the planet.

crossed with ayeokthen

Hmm. My initial response is - one present. That's normal, isn't it? And that's what our kids get - one gift, each, from their parents.

But.... they come from a large-ish family, that likes to make a fuss on birthdays. So as well as one gift from us, they are likely to get one from each of my mum; my sister; my dad; their dad's two sisters; their dad's mum; their mentors; and probably a few other people from the wider family, too. Chuck in four or five presents from the friends they invite to their party - and that's adding up to quite a pile.

I can see how, in families that are structured differently, it might be standard to create that 'pile' a different way.

Dammit, that sounds patronising. It's not meant to.

WankersHacksandThieves you put it better than I did!

One present from each person on birthdays unless they're small.
Christmas is the time for multiple presents.

the thing is no one can answer this, Firstly we have no idea what his most wanted item was..One year my DS wanted a rubix cube.. thats what he asked for ...He got more than that.

However he doesn't tend to get things on a regular basis.

If we follow the MN train of thought for virtuous parents..One present for birthdays. One for christmas book and Pj's as stocking fillers.

These children would have 2 toys a year and yes my DS has far more than this..He has very little relatives so yes I make sure he has what he needs.

Without context no idea.

I only ever got one birthday present from my parents, but gave my own kids several on their birthdays. Its up to the individual.

The toy was Ninjago Ultra Stealth Raider.

Thanks everyone for your different views

DS normally gets one big present from us for his birthday. He gets presents from family and friends too and Christmas is only a month later. I don't think it's mean at all.

I think one large present from you, combined with the birthday treat (cinema and meal out) is fine.

As others have mentioned, small presents from siblings is nice, but you haven't mentioned that, I assume he doesn't have any?

Have you previously given him lots of presents? If he remembers this from previous years I can understand why he may be disappointed. If last year you gave him e.g. 4 presents, even if their combined value was less than his gift this year, he may feel he has less this year, as he may be too young to understand the cost of presents.

DD turns 11 in 2 weeks. She is getting one gift from us, cost about £20 (admittedly, it was on clearance - regular price was closer to £60).

Her brother is giving her a small Lego set, her cousin is giving her an accessory that goes with her main gift. That is more than plenty in our eyes, but we also acknowledge other families do different things for birthdays.

For the record, the Ninjago toy is pretty cool - DD is getting a smaller Ninjago set from her DB. She loves that stuff :)

5 or 6 is the norm here (usually one "big" present, something to wear, something to read, something to eat and some little bits and pieces). This is in line with pretty much everyone I know - never heard anyone say they only give 1 present but if it works for you, why not?

It's a birthday with a present. What is the mutiple present thing? Surely that's Christmas stocking etc (still do a Father Christmas round here for adults and children no matter how unpopular the fictitious gift giver is on MN!)

That Ninjago thing is about £80. That's a lot of money and your DS is very lucky. Plus he was taken out to the cinema, for a meal AND has a party on Saturday! Goodness me, that's absolutely plenty xx

At that age I think it's as much about opening the presents as what's in them. The excitement of 'what's in there' is half the pleasure. We do one main gift and lots of little ones, but we celebrate and give more for birthdays than Christmas, as we think celebrating your own day, not someone else's is more important. Each to their own and whatever works for your family, but I can understand the dissapointment of 1 gift on your birthday for an 8 yr old.

I only did 1 present for mine i dont do birthday lists imo that is for Christmas he will be laden on saturday with presents he will be fine ☺

Sometimes i would by a little extra for the parcel but that was it they also go t a birthday day out and dinner thats loads