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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I dislike children.

378 replies

HonestJan · 01/10/2016 19:51

What is wrong with me?

Never liked em. I don't find them cute, sweet, funny, interesting or entertaining. I have a few nieces/nephews and obviously love them but I don't enjoy the whole 'come watch little niece sing/dance 😍' and then enduring a painfully shit performance, 'Wow look at what little nephew has drawn' and it's a dreadful mess/ordinary drawing, and so on.

When kids do things like throw tantrums or make a scene in public and their parents do that 'ah isn't she adorable' look, I just don't get it.

When I'm sitting having a coffee and they come over to me/others to pester them and the parents leave them to it as if everyone must find their children as wonderful as they do, I don't get that either.

Babies I have no interest in either. I don't want to cuddle a small person or pull silly faces and coo over it.

I really enjoy people and I'm sure I'll have much more time and patience for my nieces and nephews when they grow up but I seem to be considered some sort of monster for not having an interest in children.

OP posts:
PigletWasPoohsFriend · 01/10/2016 23:03

But it's something that has cropped up more frequently recently than in my whole 7 years on MN, and I'm really starting to feel unwelcome. Maybe pause for a moment and think of those of us who are struggling with infertility before you tell us that we're sad for posting here on a Saturday night

I agree.

Some people need to think before they post. There seems to be a lot of self righteousness around at the moment.

ThymeLord · 01/10/2016 23:04

AIBU about this dick who parks on my drive?

Sorry, before I answer, are you a mother?

Right.

TaterTots · 01/10/2016 23:06

It's called Mumsnet....there's a huge clue in the title there Confused

What a load of old bollocks.

ThymeLord · 01/10/2016 23:08

I'd like to respond Tater but first I need to know if you're a mother. Sorry but thems the rules of MUMSnet.

LHReturns · 01/10/2016 23:11

Mathanxiety, spot on as ever. Before I had a child (very late), I didn't plan to have any, and didn't particularly enjoy other people's kids. However, it didn't take much to show interest in what my friends cared about (their kids), because they were happy to show interest in my stuff (my career, interior design, puppy training, fashion) which they probably thought was about as pointless as I thought their offspring were.

Desolate and Kittens, I am so sorry. I have a lot of friends over on Infertility who would be equally hurt to read many posts in this thread about who MN is for.

BroomHandledMouser · 01/10/2016 23:12

It really isn't.

It had never occurred to me to come onto a parenting forum...to ask for parenting advice for my children Smile

Desolate, you've clearly gone a bit OTT with my post. That isn't what I meant and you know it.

The title of the forum is mumsnet...whilst I appreciate a lot of other sections are for other topics, the main focus is advice/help for parents.

TaterTots · 01/10/2016 23:12

I'm not, Thyme, so I should probably make like Will Young and leave right now.

ThymeLord · 01/10/2016 23:13

Before you fall any deeper?

ThymeLord · 01/10/2016 23:14

I couldn't give two shits what the name of the website is. Look around said website and observe how many threads are actually about children.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 01/10/2016 23:14

the main focus is advice/help for parents

I wouldn't even say that is the case these days.

DesolateWaist · 01/10/2016 23:14

No I haven't gone OTT.

There is a lot I can join in with. Gone are the days when the barren women were banished.

BroomHandledMouser · 01/10/2016 23:15

Yes, quite a few Confused

I posted one this evening about how worried I was about my son and had one reply. Says it all really

BroomHandledMouser · 01/10/2016 23:16

Ffs I didn't say there wasn't Desloate. Join is with what you want!

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 01/10/2016 23:18

I posted one this evening about how worried I was about my son and had one reply. Says it all really

Not sure what that is supposed to mean?

DesolateWaist · 01/10/2016 23:18

I just looked at the active threads. 11 were directly about children.

BroomHandledMouser · 01/10/2016 23:19

It means I posted for advice about my son on a parenting forum and got none!

LucyLot · 01/10/2016 23:21

YANBU especially about strangers allowing their kids to wander over to me in restaurants and disturb me and my friend and expect me to engage with their child. I just ignore ignore ignore. Most people don't find other people's babies cute!

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 01/10/2016 23:21

I just looked at the active threads. 11 were directly about children.

Which as there are over 40 active threads. It isn't that many.

IPityThePontipines · 01/10/2016 23:23

It's bollocks that the site is called "Mumsnet by parents for parents"?

No, that's what the site is called.

That's why if you start a thread better suited to the childfree subreddit, you aren't going to get a good reaction.

Why is everyone falling over themselves to agree with the OP about how dreadful their kids are?

Because they want to be cool and hip and unmumsy, like the oh so witty childfree by choice lot on here who seem determined to argue that the Mum in Mumsnet doesn't exist.

If you think that children are awful and Mums are the worst, why on earth would you post on here, because regardless of the site content, most of the posters are people you clearly despise?

I'm also Hmm at "proto-human".

missbishi · 01/10/2016 23:24

the main focus is advice/help for parents

What, like penis beakers and Maui?

BroomHandledMouser · 01/10/2016 23:28

whilst I appreciate a lot of other sections are for other topics.....

LucyLot · 01/10/2016 23:34

It's pretty mean to bash someone for admitting they don't find children adorable and cute. It isn't a choice. As a child I only ever played with stuffed animals, never dolls. I've just never been bothered by kids at all and find babies and toddlers annoying if I'm honest. That's not me choosing to be a "bitch" I just don't have that feeling towards them. Doesn't make me or others who feel the same bad people, so get off our cases!

KittensWithWeapons · 01/10/2016 23:35

'I posted one this evening about how worried I was about my son and had one reply. Says it all really'. Okay. So what exactly do you think it says, when you post 'says it all really'?

moreslackthanslick · 01/10/2016 23:37

Speaking as a cool and hip child free person Hmm

I avoid talking about children or bother wth any children threads, when I do it's usually something entitled (I just gave birth! I wanted a 4 course meal not toast!) so I don't bother replying. I do wonder why you think I should find them so fascinating though. All I see on this site is how they seem to wreck relationships and make previously sane people completely neurotic. Observed in RL also.

I do have some sane parent friends, I like their kids.

I really find the attitude "we are the mummies, we rule the site" so annoying and judgemental - not to me, couldn't give a fuck. But please consider those struggling with infertility.

Gwenhwyfar · 01/10/2016 23:38

I think the problem is the modern treatment of children as 'little kings'. When we were children we were told to get on with things and not disturb the adults, now the children need to be fawned over all the time.
Children are fine, but don't ask me to play with one because I'm an adult.