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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have wanted more than toast?

400 replies

Womenareliketeabags · 01/10/2016 17:17

First time posting in AIBU so please be kind and I'm prepared to accept I am.

A few weeks ago I had a planned home birth, birth went well until the placenta was delivered at which point I had a large haemorrhage and was rushed to the nearest labour ward in an ambulance. By the time I had been sorted and I got my coffee and toast it was 01.30am and I hadn't eaten since lunch at 12.30pmish so I was very very hungry! Coffee and toast was lovely. However it did not ease my hunger, the kind midwife offered to see if they had a spare sandwich lying around, there wasn't so she made me some more toast. As I had been rushed in I didn't have my purse and my hospital bag only had very basic stuff, was middle of the night and DH had left at this point so I had no way of getting food from else where.

AIBU to think that labour wards should be able to access food for women at all hours of the day and night?

OP posts:

EveOnline2016 · 01/10/2016 17:32

As much as I sympathise a lot of food would go to waste.

What I do recommend that everyone should pack a bag for emergencies. In my bag I have an emergency charger clean underwear and fresh pj and a little purse with £10 of coins. Also pj and underwear for the DC.

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 01/10/2016 17:32

I didn't get any food after I gave birth.

Or a cup of tea.

Or any food the next day...

MillieMoodle · 01/10/2016 17:33

It might be useful if they had a fridge with sandwiches or something but it's a hospital not a restaurant so I understand why they don't.

I had DS2 at around 3am, was moved to post natal ward around 5am and got a cup of tea and two rounds of toast, plus butter, jam and marmite so I could choose what to put on it. The midwife also asked if I wanted any more toast when I'd finished. I could have eaten a whole loaf but didn't have any more. Then had breakfast around 8am which was coco pops and the best I've ever tasted! I'd taken cereal bars in with me, and sweets and glucose tablets all of which helped stave off the hunger.

TheNaze73 · 01/10/2016 17:34

YABU. It's the NHS, not the Ivy

edwinbear · 01/10/2016 17:36

I'm afraid I concur with other PP's. When you say your hospital had only had basic stuff, I would class money and snacks as being pretty basic necessities.

Parker231 · 01/10/2016 17:39

Why did your DH leave without checking that you had everything you needed?

FeckinCrutches · 01/10/2016 17:40

Where on earth did you work that had a selection of frozen ready meals at their disposal? Genuinely interested as been in and out of NHS for 25 years and have never seen this!

Elisheva · 01/10/2016 17:40

I think YANBU. Good nutrition is vital to recovery from any sort of medical trauma. Food is a necessity, not a luxury. And it's not like you're the only woman to be hungry after giving birth in the middle of the night. A stock of toast, fruit, cereal, biscuits can't be that hard to maintain.

LineyReborn · 01/10/2016 17:43

Tbh I'd have eaten the cold McDonald's.

But I'd have preferred a second bit of toast.

Fancythat69 · 01/10/2016 17:43

I gave birth at 6.29am and 8.29pm - didn't get any food after either? I didn't even realise tea and toast was a "thing" after giving birth until I read this thread!

PonkAlert · 01/10/2016 17:43

Breakfast Tuesday am - toast. Then taken for induction, told not to eat in case of need for section.

DC born Wednesday afternoon (Christmas Eve - no where open for DH to get anything). Taken to ward at midnight and given toast.

Christmas morning - no bread left for toast. No other breakfast available. Food orders taken for dinner, no option but Christmas dinner for lunch.

2pm - Christmas dinner arrives. I am not a fussy eater but it was completely inedible (everything burnt/overcooked, then microwaved, then sat on trolley in plastic tub for god knows how long and freezing cold). Decided to wait for dinner, since we'd been allowed to order it.

6pm - told no dinner available. Given an orange.

8pm - my mother arrives with leftovers from her own Christmas dinner. I actually cry with delight.

Moral of the tale: always pack food in your hospital bag!

Poocatcherchampion · 01/10/2016 17:44

Yabu.

What snacks were in your hospital bag?
Why did your dh not make sure you were sorted?

I speak from experience of not eating for the duration of my 3 day labour. I was too hungry to have a chance to push that baby out. Wasnt the NHS' fault though.

Timeforabiscuit · 01/10/2016 17:45

Actually i agree with the op.

How on earth are you meant to recover and successfully establish breast feeding on toast?

By previous posters logic, everyone who wants a guaranteed meal once every 24 hours should opt for a home birth.

Oysterbabe · 01/10/2016 17:45

I stayed in a while when DD was in NICU. Because I was always with her I frequently missed dinner I barely ate. I remember having a packet of haribo as a meal one of the days because it was the most substantial thing in the vending machine.

They do their best with limited resources but I think improvements could be made.

Dontyouopenthattrapdoor · 01/10/2016 17:46

Tbh I'd rather the NHS spent it's money elsewhere.

Toast would tide you over till morning.

Vintagegirl1 · 01/10/2016 17:46

I didn't even get toast as there had been a fire and they were waiting on a healthy and safety check. I got a cup of tea and 3 digestives! Other husbands turned up next day with flowers.goodies etc and my dh turned up with nowt!

sleepy16 · 01/10/2016 17:47

When I had my dd I was never put on the ward, I stayed in delivery for the whole 24 hours I was in.
I was induced at 10pm and had baby at 6am.
Had tea and toast, dh had to go home as have other children (who fil looked after).
I had to stay in until 10 pm due to small baby and pph.
I was only offered a sandwich at 12, I had money but was not allowed to go anywhere to get anything.
Tbh I had an awful time and even had to clean up after the birth, I was pretty much left on my own which contributed to me having pnd.
I'm not saying hospitals should pander to you but surley this should not be the norm?
But then I sposed I could of packed some food, maybe iabu.

mothermother · 01/10/2016 17:50

it was absolutely your and your husbands responsability. i always pack loads of snacks in my bag and my husband buys me food.

1frenchfoodie · 01/10/2016 17:51

I agree with you that the labour ward should be able to access more than just toast. After a long labour and in prep for recovery and breastfeeding a sandwich doesn't seem too much to ask. The nice midwives I had saved me a sarnie when I was in labour for 13h on various drips with no food, finishing around 1.30am. Best egg sandwich Ever.

1frenchfoodie · 01/10/2016 17:52

I did have snacks in my hospital bag too though..

Pjmaskswrecksmyhead · 01/10/2016 17:52

I don't think anyone expects you to establish breastfeeding on just toast! It's just something to tide you over until breakfast! After my 3 cs I found the food great and plenty of it. Selection of cereal and toast with tea or coffee and orange or apple juice. Hot lunch and dinner with tea and biscutis/scone in between. Plenty to get bf established imo.

Noofly · 01/10/2016 17:53

I didn't even get toast! I ended up spending a week in hospital and I was so hungry the whole time. I begged to be released early just so I could go home and eat.

grandmainmypocket · 01/10/2016 17:53

Congratulations on your baby.

I'm sorry I think you're being unreasonable. Your husband should have got you something before leaving if it was possible, if need be.

JaniceBattersby · 01/10/2016 17:54

I would've eaten the McDonald's.

Champagneformyrealfriends · 01/10/2016 17:55

YABU-it's not a hotel

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