To have wanted more than toast?

[Womenareliketeabags]

First time posting in AIBU so please be kind and I'm prepared to accept I am.

A few weeks ago I had a planned home birth, birth went well until the placenta was delivered at which point I had a large haemorrhage and was rushed to the nearest labour ward in an ambulance. By the time I had been sorted and I got my coffee and toast it was 01.30am and I hadn't eaten since lunch at 12.30pmish so I was very very hungry! Coffee and toast was lovely. However it did not ease my hunger, the kind midwife offered to see if they had a spare sandwich lying around, there wasn't so she made me some more toast. As I had been rushed in I didn't have my purse and my hospital bag only had very basic stuff, was middle of the night and DH had left at this point so I had no way of getting food from else where.

AIBU to think that labour wards should be able to access food for women at all hours of the day and night?

[Wallykazam]

Yabu, thanks to NHS who acted quickly to save you and your baby, food is not their priority, to think what happens in lesser developed countries.

[Youarenotprepared]

They always give tea and toast. It's partly practicalities at 1am but they do it whatever time you give birth. I've had babies at 11pm, 6am and 1pm and always got toast.

The midwife told me it's really common to puke after labour so they don't actually want to give you lots immediately as although you are starving it makes you likely to binge and puke.

If you keep the toast down they can sometimes scavenge for you a bit afterwards but it depends what's about.

Nhs budget cuts means zero funding for 24 hour catering.

[PinkSwimGoggles]

also, it shouldn't be that you have to miss a meal because you were transfered from labour to postnatal just after mealtime.

[MissDuke]

They sent your dh home even though they still thought you were going to theatre? That is a very unusual situation tbh!

To those PP's who seem to think that I was expecting a personal chef to cook me whatever fancy dish I desired this is not the case, I know how under funded the NHS is I was just honestly surprised that on a ward that is 24hrs and women give birth at anytime and are all hungry that the only thing available was toast. For example if you were a single lady who was rushed to hospital off the street and were unable to get your well packed bag from home then there is little option to you

I have worked in two different hospitals now and on both, all women got tea and toast right after the birth and then a proper meal at the next meal time - so day or night, you wait until meal time for something more substantial. I have genuinely never heard a word of complaint, the women always say it is the nicest toast ever and I keep offering more until they are satisfied. I certainly wouldn't have wanted anything other than toast after I had my three babies.

However I do have some sympathy! I had to stay in hospital with my dd when she was 4 months, normally bf mothers get fed on the paed ward but I guess I missed the meal time, hadn't eaten since lunch and had to wait until lunch the next day. I was ravenous! I knew it was my own fault though for not bringing money or food, I just forgot in the moment as my dd was very ill so I only thought to lift her bag and not mine. I certainly don't think a 24hr kitchen should be established though, it would be a ridiculous waste of money.

[StuffandBother]

I think I have a different idea of what the NHS actually is compared to some delusional, entitled people!! You medically need sustenance and you were given something that is palatable and usually inoffensive, you do realise the NHS is on its knees dong you? have a to go with your toast!

[43percentburnt]

One local hospital used to put leftover meals (ie if a patient ordered and was discharged early) in the fridge on the maternity ward. Saves it being wasted. They also had weetabix and biscuits to hand.

[Phalenopsisgirl]

Yabu to expect anything but I know our labour ward keeps back sandwiches from the lunch / dinner service in the fridge for just this eventuality. I love the toast, it's the best toast of your life, even though it's cheapy bread and cold. The moral here is stuff a few nibbles in your hospital bag, even if you are expecting to be at home -huge congratulations on your new baby

[arethereanyleftatall]

There is a finite pot of money for the nhs. I would rather they prioritise treatments.
Yes, food is important, so bring it yourself.
Yabu.

[arethereanyleftatall]

Also, it's interesting how people's expectations differ. I remember thinking how sweet it was when they offered me tea and toast, it felt really decadent compared to the cereal bars I had packed.

[sentia]

I don't think the NHS is on its knees due to attempts in the past to provide more than toast in the middle of the night...

[girlwithamoonandstaronherhead]

YAB a bit unreasonable, but I understand. I was once in hospital with DS1, who I was breastfeeding, and also pregnant, so needed to eat constantly. Had been admitted unexpectedly and had nothing with me, couldn't leave DS, asked politely for a bite to eat a couple of times before breaking down in tears I was so completely starving! They brought be a sandwich.

[arethereanyleftatall]

To those saying more food should be offered, what service/treatments would you drop to finance this?

[HandbagCrab]

Yanbu. It wouldn't bankrupt the nhs to have a few long life food products available on 24 hr admittance wards. Maybe hospitals could have a 24hr spar ran by someone else to provide for the staff and patients. I reckon it would be a right moneyspinner.

[Soyouare2faced]

I had non stop toast, there was a little kitchen. At one point I went to make my own in the night and the midwife ushered me back to bed and went go make it for me with a cup of tea. Even did it how I like it, cold with best butter. Bloody amazing

[PerspicaciaTick]

The tea and toast I had (with apricot jam) was the most delicious meal I have ever eaten.
I ate DH's too.

[randomsabreuse]

My primary memory of my 24h stay was being ravenous. I had tonnes of snacks in the hospital bag but got sick of snack food - had flapjack, crisps, chocolate and fruit but just wanted something more tasty and substantial. Was quite a quick labour but came down to ward after dinner so had to send DH for a McDonalds otherwise it would have been nothing but toast until breakfast having missed lunch due to being busy pushing...

Similar happened to DH when he had an orthopaedic op which started late so he was kept in overnight on a day ward with no provision for dinner. This was a weekday so I could get sandwiches for him and the guy after him on the list but of course DD was born Sunday afternoon so by the time we were on the ward nowhere other than garages and fast food places were open and all the garages within striking distance were picked clean!

[Lindy2]

I'd rather the NHS concentrated their time and money on medical care not catering.
Your DH should have made sure you had money and food before he left. You should also have packed snacks in your bag. A packet of crackers, chocolate etc could stay in your bag ready for you for weeks before the birth. It doesn't have to be last minute, You just needed to be a bit more prepared and organised.

[Womenareliketeabags]

I honestly think some people misunderstand me.

I am not moaning that all I got was coffee and toast!

I did not expect anything else.

I was and am very grateful for the coffee and toast and for all the care I received. I was happy to wait for the next mealtime. However I obviously foolishly thought that other provisions may have been available on a labour/post-natal ward. My mistake.

[Soyouare2faced]

Op I agree with you, you could end up on the labour ward under any circumstances, with no bag etc , it's not too much to expect a bit of food after giving birth

[Soyouare2faced]

I more shocked at the choosing a coffee rather than tea

[Phalenopsisgirl]

arethere anyleft atall.....I agree, toast and tea in bed, I felt like the queen! Plus they fed the whole family, dh and ds , it was an absolute toast mountain!
Op Maybe this could be 'your thing' be the change you want to see in the world. Start a scheme that pays for a microwave, small fridge and stock it with ready meals for other parents. Asking grateful parents to donate to the pot for the next people. Our ward had a spares cupboard for people who had packed 3 vests thinking that was loads and all 3 were dirty within 2 hours. I didn't need it but saw other ladies rooting through because they were desperate, there weren't many items in there and so when dd was out of newborn I took a big bag back to them. I did think if everyone did the same there would be enough for every family to be sent home with a few spare sets. You could start a food cupboard.

[dnwig]

Yanbu...but I would have been glad of toast after my second birth. Was told "no tea and toast" as nearly time for evening meal. That turned out to be a ham salad with no bread, potatoes or other carbs.

Was so hungry!

It was Christmas day and everyone else had apparently had a Christmas dinner at midday...,😕

[suspiciousofgoldfish]

Just came in to say, I love toast.

[PinkSwimGoggles]

I'd rather the NHS concentrated their time and money on medical care not catering.

but providing adequate nutrition is part of the medical care

[Soyouare2faced]

I'm baffled as mine had everything, milk , tea/coffee/juice , fresh fruit, cereal, toast, cheese and crackers, you could just help yourself 24/7. There was a staff fridge with a lock on so didn't take theirs by accident.