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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am 41 weeks pregnant and twat of a husband won't help clean

82 replies

yeahyoudid · 30/09/2016 22:11

I'm trying to get my house in a fit state for home birth with two toddlers around- had a row with DH about cleaning the bathroom and he flounced to bed at 7 pm and REFUSES to get up and help therefore forcing me to clean every room. I'm so fucking furious. Regardless of me being a dick during the argument AIBU to think he needs to get up and help?? He says he won't cos I'm shouting - I'm shouting cos he's lying in bed trying to sleep. Aaaaggghh.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 01/10/2016 00:17

What is the point of him other than as a sperm donor ?

RunningLulu · 01/10/2016 02:38

Stop cleaning. Relax. And stop shouting at your dh. Shouting at someone doesn't make you right, it just makes people dislike wanting to help you.

Sunshineonacloudyday · 01/10/2016 03:22

AnyFucker someone has to bring home the money to feed mother and baby.

Mummernot · 01/10/2016 03:55

This reply has been deleted

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MistressDeeCee · 01/10/2016 04:00

So he has a way he expects you to ask for help? You have to be suitably meek and humble according to his standards, to ask him to do what he should be doing anyway without being asked?

You have the patience of a saint - he's lying down in bed he needs a big bucket of cold water chucked over his lazy entitled misogynist arse

41 weeks pregnant, and you are doing the cleaning alone. With 2 toddlers to care for as well so obviously there's cleaning to be done, toddlers generate mess!

Yes Id put out a call for help with cleaning, you must be shattered. Family & good mates could help, thats if it would even shame him because a man who won't help his heavily pregnant partner is plain lazy

People are awful. Why is there always a point to prove? If you want some cleaning done why the fuck can't he just help you, its not as if you are asking him to climb a mountain! You'd do the tasks together then finished, end of story. What on earth is the big deal?

Relationships are about compromise and sharing a load, not making the usual dumb misogynistic excuse "you didnt talk to me in the CORRECT tone of voice so now Im going to punish you"

I cba. Ive been through it with a man like that and got rid long ago. OH now wouldn't ever behave in that way and is good in the main but then again I don't live with him and won't ever live with a man again. He has his home how he likes it, and I have mine. I find men tiring to live with

Congrats on your impending new baby I hope all goes well and you have some good people you can call on who will be happy to help so you can have order, and a good rest when needed Flowers

Reality01 · 01/10/2016 04:04

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mathanxiety · 01/10/2016 04:14

I would go ahead and ask for help.

This man needs a good boot up the arse, and if he doesn't improve over his previous performance when the older DCs were born I would ask for help after you have this baby too.

Would his mum be any help to you? How about any sisters?

When the baby is born, maybe consider ignoring his laundry.

mathanxiety · 01/10/2016 04:15

Or does he have a brother who might care to administer the boot up the arse?

rainbowstardrops · 01/10/2016 08:31

I sincerely hope he has many other redeeming features about him because otherwise I'd be bloody kicking him out! I certainly wouldn't be having babies with him.
He sounds pathetic.

Penfold007 · 01/10/2016 08:43

I'm with Rainbow. Good luck with two toddlers, man child and baby

Allergictoironing · 01/10/2016 08:47

Woohoo troll alert!

Keep up with the misandry. Remember it doesnt matter how you behave its all that damn woman hating patriarchy loving mans fault

Nothing to do with misandry, I'm pretty sure the comments would be identical if the partner was another woman. If you really can't see that refusing to do a small share of the chores when labour is imminent is being lazy, then I feel sorry for your comprehension.

Realhousewivesofshit · 01/10/2016 09:00

If you were my dil I would be round like a shot kicking my ds up the arse. !!!

I would definatly contact girl friends and family to help. If s friend of mine posted that I would be there. He needs shaming and I would do just that.

mistress spot on post.

tibbawyrots · 01/10/2016 09:08

PP advising to get girlfriends/MIL around to clean because the husband can't be arsed to?

So if he chooses to be lazy then other females have to step in because he won't? HmmConfused

NapQueen · 01/10/2016 09:09

Oh my god what a prick!

Try and rest up op.

glueandstick · 01/10/2016 09:15

I have only been 42 weeks with one child (first and last) but I was ready to murder just about everyone by that time.

You're doing well to hold your shit together with small kids.

Your husband is being a man child.

Somerville · 01/10/2016 09:17

Women have been sticking by other women for generations when men choose not to help.

It's sad when it needs to happen, but being helped by other women (though it would be good to ask male family members too) is better than not being helped at all, at 41 weeks pregant.

StatisticallyChallenged · 01/10/2016 09:19

I don't care what sex you are, if you are sharing a house with a heavily pregnant nesting woman you help clean. Doubly so if you are the other parents of the child she's about to give birth to. He's being an utter cunt.

yeahyoudid · 02/10/2016 02:59

Well after all that twattery and nesting beautiful baby boy arrived this morning!! Wink

OP posts:
f1fan2015 · 02/10/2016 03:08

Congratulations!

spacefrog35 · 02/10/2016 03:20

Congratulations Flowers

perfumedlife · 02/10/2016 03:49

"What is the point of him other than as a sperm donor ?" AnyFucker that was uncalled for.

Congratulations op, wonderful news!

femfemlicious · 02/10/2016 04:00

Please stop having children with this man

Eminado · 02/10/2016 04:09

It won't even take him long, he probably argued and moaned longer than the cleaning would take ! It's not much to ask for a clean house to birth in.

Absolutely agree with 👆🏽

Eminado · 02/10/2016 04:11

Ah congrats OP!!! Flowers

perfumedlife · 02/10/2016 04:20

"Please stop having children with this man" Dear god. Perspective.

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