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AIBU?

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To not of moved

226 replies

Pretenditsaplan · 29/09/2016 18:17

I get half an hour for lunch. During that time I like to sit on a bench near to my work and read. During that time I'll smoke 2 cigarettes one when I first get there and one just before I go back in. Today I'm just lit my second cigarette and just getting to a good bit in my book.

A lady with a screaming kid in a pushchair sits on the bench next to me. Not on one of the equally pleasant but slightly further away from the fag smoke benches but on a bench so close if there hadn't of been arm rest between us we'd of be touching. I thought it was a little weird but she was probably just harassed dealing with little ones temper tantrum.

She calms the girl down and starts feeding her some lunch. I get on with my book. She does that little cough thingy to get my attention. I glance up and she's pulling her face like shes stepped in dog shit but says nothing so I ignore her. She steps up the fake coughing and when I don't look up this time leans over and says pointedly "that's going in my face"

I'm a little non plussed because there's 8 benches around a small town square and I'm the only one smoking. Behind is a flower bed thing were another lady is perched also smoking. There's 3 other sides all smoke free. I mumbled an apology and tried to hurry my fag.

At this point she's raises her voice and says "I think it's disgusting your smoking next to a child that's eating." By now I'm getting annoyed. She chose to sit there and if she hadn't noticed me to begin with she could of easily moved before starting to pass her child wotsits. I point out very calmly I was smoking when she sat down. She tells me I should of moved as soon as she did and she shouldn't have to put up with it.

At this point I'm almost finished and about to go back to work when she goes on a tirade that I shouldn't be smoking anyway that I was too young and it was illegal in public places. I finish my fag and tell her not only am I 30 and can smoke if I damn well please it's illegal to smoke in enclosed public places but outside it's perfectly legal. (At which point I hear a laugh from the woman behind me.) Angry lady gathers her things and storms off and sits on the benches opposite glaring at me. By this time my breaks finishing and and saunter past her with a big smile and a wave.

What annoyed me was the assumption even though I'd been sitting there well before she got there I should move as she's so much more important. But I've been having a bad day so maybe I should of bowed down to her mightiness and and just moved. Wibu to not just move as soon as she sat down?

OP posts:
NotYoda · 29/09/2016 20:07

Lweji

You and I are bothe correct, AFAIK. If I'm wrong, happy for you to correct me

NotYoda · 29/09/2016 20:07

both

5OBalesofHay · 29/09/2016 20:11

Lewiji it should be 'if I were' not 'if I was' given you'd want to be told

Spadequeen · 29/09/2016 20:11

I loathe smoking. I hate the smoke, the smell, the ash, absolutely everything about it.

Saying all that, the woman with the child was rude. She should have moved or not say there in the first place.

If she was their first then you say down and lit up then she'd have a point. But she wasn't

If I were you, I'd have started a 3rd one just to prove a point. But I'm petty like that.

You did nothing wrong op. We'll apart from apologising and trying to hurry up!

DixieWishbone · 29/09/2016 20:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Firsttimer82 · 29/09/2016 20:13

She was looking for a fight...

pasturesgreen · 29/09/2016 20:15

She was the one being very unreasonable.

However, you too are being unreasonable for using of instead of have.

.

Pseudonym99 · 29/09/2016 20:15

Nothing wrong with correcting people's English. If people want me to read what they have written, then don't put me off by using bad English.

OhtoblazeswithElvira · 29/09/2016 20:16

Yanbu

But it's have
Have
HAVE

Pseudonym99 · 29/09/2016 20:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

ghostspirit · 29/09/2016 20:19

I hate smoking big time I can smell it from miles. I know smokers that hold the fag on there hand that's further away from me/kids. They think its helpful.....it's not!!!

Anyway op you were fine not to move.you were there first simple as that. She choose tone sit next to you then moan. That's out of order. Seems like she was looking for an agument.

As for people picking on grammar...sad

Liiinoo · 29/09/2016 20:20

YANBU. But stop smoking. Quite apart from anything else it will ruin your skin!

Didyoumeantobesorude1 · 29/09/2016 20:21

You are definitely not being unreasonable. She should have sat on a different bench.
And although the people who are correcting "should of" to "should have" are absolutely correct, I think you should be commended for your correct use of the word nonplussed, which many people nowadays use incorrectly.
"Should have" is easy to remember if you think of the phrase "I have eaten" and just add "I should have eaten". "Should of" has crept into the language because people say "should've" quickly so the "have" sounds like "of".
I am saying this to be helpful, not critical.

ItShouldHaveBeenJess · 29/09/2016 20:25

I'd just like to let the grammar pedants know that I am noting down their usernames, and will be looking out for the on future threads. If I see so much as an apostrophe out of place, there will be consequences.

The OP has had a shitty day. She's typed a long post in a possibly emotional state. Please, give her a break and a bit of kindness.

NotYoda · 29/09/2016 20:25

I also like rampage, glaring and saunter and harassed. OP is not feeling stupid.

HeCantBeSerious · 29/09/2016 20:25

Should of' etc have become common parlance in areas where 'should've' and 'should of' sound identical. Calm down and stop being prescriptivist.

The users of this site should have moved past writing phonetically though. 😉

ItShouldHaveBeenJess · 29/09/2016 20:26

'Them', dammit! Of course I'd manage a typo!

NotYoda · 29/09/2016 20:26
Grin
ghostspirit · 29/09/2016 20:28

jess people change their names all the time. So probably no point noting them down

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/09/2016 20:29

I'd just like to let the grammar pedants know that I am noting down their usernames, and will be looking out for the on future threads. If I see so much as an apostrophe out of place, there will be consequences

What 'consequences'?

I don't generally pull people on spelling/grammar but it's just as twattish to tell people that you are making a list - it makes you sound a tad unhinged

usual · 29/09/2016 20:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/09/2016 20:33

And hinting at 'consequences' is totally okay then?

usual · 29/09/2016 20:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PunkrockerGirl · 29/09/2016 20:39

don't assume it's a fake cough
But why if it's a genuine cough would you deliberately go and sit next to someone who's smoking? apart from a bit of anti smoker attention seeking and yet more sympathy from other anti smokers, obviously
Personally I love the fake coughing, hand waving and cats bum faces that happen around smokers. It's not the smokers that look ridiculous...

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/09/2016 20:39

I think some of you need to get out more Grin