To get frustrated when I see...

[ptsleslie]

Children in prams when they're obviously too big, their bottoms practically dragging on the floor, knees up by their chins! Children still in nappies, walking round with dummies/bottles etc!! Argh it really gets to me! I obviously don't say anything but I can't help but want to shake the parent when I see it even if it's a total stranger I appreciate sometimes there may be a disability but probably more often than not there's no need, often ease for the parents I think. One of the best thing about children is watching them grow and develop and people who don't encourage it really grip my shit!

I would have been one of these children, I think. Inexplicably late walking and potty training (talked v early though - priorities ). Also as we all walked everywhere and didn't drive the pushchair was used later than it would have been if we'd been using a car, simply because of the distances.

However... I know what you mean, a bit. You can never tell what the case it with a particualar individual child, but it isn't always SN or late development. I know a teacher who was shocked, when moving to a school in a different area, to discover that so many of the children starting nursery were not potty trained and the home visits sounded very upsetting. Children not being talked to and things like that. Actually makes me because I would not neglect a child like that but chances are I won't ever get to have any.

If only everyone was as perfect as you eh OP?

Ooops! I'm not sure if you realised, but your skirt is tucked up into your judgy pants, OP.

I think someone is bored.
But, my friend was worried about always pushing her older-ish son in a buggy - he just couldn't seem to walk very far and she didn't have a car so he had to stay in his buggy for longer than she would've liked.
When he was 6 (and out of the buggy by this point because he was too big), he was diagnosed with duccene muscular dystrophy. He's unlikely to reach adulthood.
Next time you're judging a mother with a child you deem inappropriate to be in a pram think of my friend won't you?

Wonder if OPs kids spend all their time being ferried by car everywhere (which is for some reason always acceptable).

As an aside, "grip my shit" is an even worse phrase than "boils my piss" and I judge OP accordingly.

And what age is it exactly that we should be turfing kids out of their buggies? Some kids walk at 9 months, others walk at 18 months... So why is there a problem with some kids not being in prams at 2.5, and others still being there at 3? And at what size do you judge a child to be "too old" giving the wide variety in sizes of humans in general? And what exactly do you look for to judge a disability? Because there are many invisible disabilities that wouldn't be obvious at first glance.

Basically OP you can claim to be understanding of "circumstances" all you like, but in reality when you look at a child in a pram and think "oh the poor babyyyy" you have fuck all idea of why they're there, how old they are, or the parents reasons. And besides, it has got fuck all to do with you anyway.

You clearly win at parenting. Would you like us to make you a medal?

OP Roast Thread!!!

Frustrated seems an odd word to use for something that doesn't impact you personally in the slightest.

I would imagine the vast majority of parents with older children in buggies or nappies have far more rights to be "frustrated " than you OP.

Maybe if you didn't mean to offend, you should have kept the thought in your head rather than talking out of your arse.

You know it's nice to see most people disagreeing with the OP.

It's because of people like that OP that when talking to OT and physio yesterday we decided to start looking into getting him a wheelchair rather than carry on using his SN buggy because of the way people judge older (nearly 7) children in buggies. Even when in this case it is blindingly obvious that it's not a "normal" buggy.

please do give us some parenting tips

I'm not a perfect parent and have at times done things to make my life easier not to benefit ds

no doubt I shall rot in hell for this

Yes, since you asked (why did you ask?) YABU.

YAalsoBU to use phrases like "grip my shit" and "little people".

Yes ferrying about in car seems likely because in general little legs cant walk very fast and if people need to be somewhere buggy is just practical and makes sense

Goady, that's what this is, just goady and unkind.

AIBU to be intrigued by the phrase "grip my shit"? What does it mean? Does it refer to some kind of involuntary anal spasm caused by inferior parenting?

My dc is still in nappies (pull ups), and he's 3 and a half. He may still be in pull ups when he goes to school next year. I have an older dc who was potty trained at 2.

It's none of yours or anyone else's business why my younger ds is not yet potty trained.

Ffs it it not much easier wiping a older child's bottom than toilet training them. I have two DC who will not poo in the toilet. The older one only soils at home so you can't judge. But the 4 year old is still in nappies so judge away. I have tried and tried but she is not interested is using toilet.

My DS is 7 and was in nappies until 6. He has autism and other sorts of LDs but you would not know looking at him, especially if he is in school uniform.

He was also in a buggy until quite late because he was a bolter and did not understand English enough to understand what a frantically screamed 'STOP!!!' meant.

And he had a dummy until he was well after 5 because he had night terrors. But again did not understand language enough to understand comforting.

A causal observer would see none of this. But might perhaps judge. (And indeed, I have seen the pursed lips and squinty eyed looks when he was in his buggy sucking on his dummy).

I've had 7 years to get over other people's prejudices. Doing quite well with that, thanks. :)

I used to collect DD 4 in a buggy - she was a very slight but tall girl. Her knees were around her neck. But it was 6pm at night, I'd been at work and we were both knackered. It just made the 10 min walk home easier (from her granny who picked her up from nursey) when raining, it meant at least she could stay dry and she was one of the awful walkers who when tired just dragged her feet and would often fall. DP's mum (granny in question) used to question its use but even she could see the practacality of it in the evenings.

Dummies, luckily DD gave it up by one, I do judge 5 and six year olds with dummies but actually, can't recall seeing an older child with one for a while if honest.

Nappies, meh, it does seem kids are in them later these days because of this idea "they'll do it when their ready", I was quite firm at starting PT at just turned 2.5 and we managed it within about 6 weeks or so during the day (although night time was over three with the odd accident until 4).

This thread wont end well.

My 3yo is still in his buggy for the 2mile school run to drop off and collect his older brother. No way he can walk 8miles every day. Judge away.

Highlandfling I know exactly what you're going through. It's so so hard.

Well ds is nearly 3 (in November ). He is still in nappies because he point blank refuses to use the potty or toilet. I would love to see anybody try to make him because believe me I have tried. As for buggies, he is more than capable of walking and if we are taking him in the car don't bring it but if using public transport ( and I have to do this at least one day a week because sorry we only have one car and dh needs it one of my non working days) then it is a 20 minute walk at both ends and that would pretty much double if we walked. As for bottles well he has finally given up those but we almost always have sippy cups with lid or he doesn't drink. None of the above means I am not encouraging his development so Yabu.

My child walks for about twenty minutes then goes in the pram for the fifteen minutes along the main road on the way to school.
But I'm lazier than the people who drive for fifteen minutes instead with kids who only walk from the car across the playground to the main entrance. Right!

dc1 had a dummy until he was around 3 and a half years old. He was quite attached to it. His siblings had theirs till they were around 1 and even then they weren't too fussed about it.

Thanks cozy. Sorry you are dealing with it too.It is so frustrating and even more frustrating to think there are people judging away.
But each child is different. My eldest was dry day and night at 3 and had no problems pooing in the right place.