To expect my DH to get out of bed

[Maxwellthecat]

So my DH wakes up earlier than me, he always has.
I have broken sleep because my very indulged cat gets me up in the night to drink from the tap (this is a topic for another post and I really don't mind getting up).
Recently my DH has started turning on the light in the bedroom when he wakes up and reading in bed, he thinks it's unreasonable of me to expect him to get up as the bed is 'cozy' and downstairs is 'cold'. He has got me an eye mask to put on to block out the light but it still wakes me up.
So can you settle this for us? Should he get up or should I put up?

I understand why the cats feel like your babies.

I feel I have 3 kids (2 human, 1 canine). However, no way would I be getting up to turn a tap on for them.

Tiny babies, fair enough.

But your cats aren't tiny babies and perfectly capable of using a water bowl or equivalent.

But why are you happy to be disturbed mulitple times by a cat, but not happy for your husband to read in bed before getting up?

Put a bowl out for the cat and get husband a kindle

Sorted

remove the lightbulb

The cat is a neutered male with a history of chronic kidney and bladder infections from refusal to drink from a bowl. We bought him a water fountain and he won't touch it, if I lock him downstairs he howls and howls and howls and because our living room is adjacent to our next door neighbours bedroom we don't think that's fair on our neighbours. They haven't said anything directly but there have been comments about our cat being 'very active in the evening'. So this is what we do that works. He hasn't had an infection since starting. He is on special food too.
We're actually supposed to take it in turns to get up but dh doesn't wake up so it's always me.

I've had this problem with my husband before - he gets up much earlier than me, around 6am though often earlier. He used to clatter around in the en suite making all the noise in the world, turning on lights and just generally being noisy. I also have broken sleep (in fact don't sleep well at all) and don't get up until 7-7.30. It was actually quite a source of tension for us and I don't think you're being unreasonable asking him to go downstairs or to just keep quiet for you! Talk to him, definitely. The kindle idea is also good. It's just about respect really.

Also I totally relate re the cat thing. My cat is my baby and I get up with her in the night regularly - I'm quiet enough that my husband sleeps soundly through it!

Is this the overhead light or bedside lamp? If the latter, would a dimmer bulb be possible?

I love reading in bed. Getting up to read doesn't compare for a second.

So the cat is a red herring!!

So is the time in my view. He's being a selfish git and waking you up. The end.

He shouldn't be turning the light on - it's very selfish and rude. If he wants to read in bed that early he needs a kindle with backlights like the paperwhite

Also I don't know why I said keep quiet for you when the issue is the light - same sentiment, I was just rambling!

Sprechenzedick
And why the fuck are you getting up just for a cat?!

What sort of anarchy is this? These are CATS we're talking about here.

You can get upon the dark and provide water (from a running tap, if these cats are anything like my little tortie used to be - sadly at the Rainbow Bridge now) and do it without even properly waking up. Having to try to sleep while some selfish git reads by full light is a different matter.

He needs a kindle with a lit screen. I got one because me reading with a book light was pissing off my dh. I love my kindle. He is being a selfish twat if he's waking you up and thinking it's ok.

Haha yes the cat is a red herring

He won't get a kindle because he 'prefers the feel of real books'

He says if the consensus is that he's being unreasonable he'll get up in the future.

Rather have some reading then be a night slave to a cat.

I would barely tolerate it that from a baby

Can't you ged rid of the stupid cat. And the Dh while your at it. Then you'll get loadsa sleep.

He is being a total bellend. Sleep deprivation is torture and cumulative.

It would wake me up too. What would follow is a verry snappy partner due to lack of those vital hours. Luckily mine has kindle paper thingy.
I would suggest a clip on reading light if he really can't go snuggle in a huge blanket with a coffee as hot water bottle on the sofa in the morning.
Christmas present ideas?

*and hot water bottle

DH could have a kindle for when he's in bed and real books the rest of the time.

Can't believe you get up for a cat...

He is unreasonable if he refuses to get a paperwhite or one of those lamps you can clip onto the book. I read in bed but only if I can do it without disturbing DP.

I woke up early to read this morning, snuggled downstairs under a blanket with a cup of tea and a kitten! Was lovely :)

He gets up or reads on a kindle.

You need to sleep train your cat.

Jelly
Can't you ged rid of the stupid cat.

Watch your mouth!

And the Dh while your at it

Fair enough.

SENPARENT
Can't believe you get up for a cat...

People - I've never begrudged being woken by babies, children, animals or the sick . . . being sleep-deprived because of the actions of a totally well and able selfish barsteward is a different matter altogether.

I can't sleep with even a gleam of light either - we have blackout curtains and blinds on out windows so that not the slightest chick squeezes though. I am on OP's side in this.

You can get bedside lights on flexible stems that you can focus on a book so that they give very little light to the rest of the room. Have a look for one of those.

Starting to think 2kids 'Igbo impact ne the cat

Might in fact be the cat**

The fuck happened there?! iPhones are shite