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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To leave baby in pushchair, at the side of the pool, while I go swimming?

220 replies

Zootopia · 22/09/2016 16:05

Hi, not sure if this would be unreasonable or not.

I have a son who has swimming lessons. It's at a country club, so you need a membership card to even have any kind of access to the pool and it's pretty small in there. Just some nice seating around the sides. I have a newborn baby who I'd rather not take swimming when DS is there as I like to focus on just him in the water (he is 3) and he is encouraged not to use floats, as he can swim underwater, but we're just getting him to do it on top, so not an option for the time being. Also, I'd just rather wait until I do baby classes.

Would I be unreasonable to leave baby in pushchair (asleep) while I go into the pool with DS? It's not mother and toddler classes, it's just him and a couple of other children but I can still use the swim lanes and would be nice to swim. Also, he likes to have a free swim before lessons start.

Thanks Smile

OP posts:
GingerbreadLatteToGo · 22/09/2016 23:14

There are some odd folk around.

I see you've already sent an email, well done, I hope they say yes. It used to be common to have babies in car seats in a row whilrpe the older ones had lessons, until that pointless pesky Little Elf got in on the act. Hopefully the Country Club uses common sense & realises there's no problem with it at all.

Just remember as a non swimmer they tend to be very warm places so watch she's not melting!

As for 'you can't keep an eye on her if you're in the pool' - do you people all sit holding your sleeping babies? You don't do housework, shower, peg the washing out?! Weird.

GingerbreadLatteToGo · 22/09/2016 23:20

It's more about if you got into some difficulty. Who would then be responsible for the child/ren?

The very same people that would be responsible if the children were both in the water with her. The very same people that would be responsible if any adult swimming with a child suddenly had a medical issue.

pollyglot · 22/09/2016 23:20

Sorry, but I used to do this with DD back in the 80s. She slept in her pushchair while I swam, then we would go swimming together in the outdoor thermal pool. She was never out of my sight. Never a problem, no-one complained, DD became very competent swimmer.

avamiah · 22/09/2016 23:23

OP,
There isn't a Pool whether it be Council run or in a Hotel that would allow a baby in a pram or without a pram, poolside unattended for any length of time.
If you are in the pool then your baby is unattended.

GingerbreadLatteToGo · 22/09/2016 23:24

I cannot believe that you are seriously, actually asking the question!! Water is the most dangerous of all...accidents happen so easily and I am sure that you would not forgive yourself...surely a swim for yourself at that time is not that important!!

How is water dangerous to a tiny baby sleeping in a carrycot prey tell?

No, of course that's right, once you're a Mum you no longer have needs or other children, you must coo over the newborn 60/24/7.

GingerbreadLatteToGo · 22/09/2016 23:25

avamiah. Clearly you didn't even read the thread or you'd know better.

Kangamum · 22/09/2016 23:27

I worked in a council pool for 10 years, everyweek we ran a post natal aqua class, and every week we had anything up to 10 babies in car seats poolside. Behind the instructor so mums were looking at them. Never once had an issue, I believe they still run it the same way.

mymatemax · 22/09/2016 23:28

Yes, Ive seen
Parents do it pool side in private gym club.
No harm will come to the baby & you will feel better for the swim. Enjoy!

SofiaAmes · 22/09/2016 23:38

Sounds perfectly reasonable to me. You could also pay a teenager a few quid to supervise your baby while poolside.

SofiaAmes · 22/09/2016 23:38

Probably statistically less risky than driving home with the baby.

WhisperingLoudly · 22/09/2016 23:40

The club where I am a member is absolutely fine with a baby in a carry cot/car seat by the pool.

Johnny5isAlive · 22/09/2016 23:46

It's nothing to do with the needs of the other child gingerbread
OP is not leaving the newborn unattended to spend time with older DC, but for herself to do lane swimming. Totally different

avamiah · 22/09/2016 23:48

Gingerbread,
Yes,
i did read the post.

Superstar90 · 22/09/2016 23:52

You are being unreasonable. You've had a second baby - you have to accept that life has changed. You simply can't do everything that you did before. Please give your newborn the time and attention she deserves.

Blueskyrain · 22/09/2016 23:54

Yes, let's all sit and stare at the sleeping new born shall we... Hmm

Original poster
Zootopia · 22/09/2016 23:58

Thanks for the replies everyone. I'm half asleep reading them so was going to wait until the morning to reply but no fucking way.

Superstar - no, no and no. So because I'm taking my son for his swimming lesson and while she's asleep, I fancied a dip in the pool, it's seen as not giving her the time and attention she needs? Hmm I wonder if I decide to take a longer bath, go on my phone when taking a shit, doing my hair in a more complicated style is also not taking care of her? Confused I mean seriously!? I have to watch her every hour of the day to be giving her the attention she needs? Am I not allowed to sleep tonight? Or...?

OP posts:
TheABC · 22/09/2016 23:58

The problem is your older DS potentially getting into difficulties whilst you attend to the baby. Plus breastfeeding whilst wet, in a swimsuit, is not comfortable - I would not want to do that whilst straining to watch your 3 year old. If you want a relaxing swim, wait a few months until your baby is a bit bigger and able to go longer between feeds. And book them into the creche.

Original poster
Zootopia · 23/09/2016 00:02

DS will be having a swimming lesson though? Yes, I said he likes to get in a bit earlier before the lesson starts, but he'll be under the supervision of the instructor, when his lesson gets going.

OP posts:
Blueskyrain · 23/09/2016 00:02

If baby cries, take 3 year old out briefly. If baby needs boob, then a tankini or bimini is probably easier access then most clothing, just take a towel to give yourself a quick dry first.

I honestly don't see the problem

Blueskyrain · 23/09/2016 00:03

Bikini, stupid autocorrect

Ilovecharliecat · 23/09/2016 00:07

Perhaps it's just me but I'd be too worried in case the pram ended up in the pool, I just over think things

vitalite · 23/09/2016 00:18

Honestly, some people! What on earth do some of you do with your newborns/very small children when you go for a shit or shower or your cooking the dinner? It takes no longer to swim a length or two as it does to go to the toilet so as long as the swimmer checks on the kid every lap or two I can't see a problem. And that's time I checked, a very small baby can't escape from a car seat or carry cot.. Sheesh!

Superstar90 · 23/09/2016 00:19

If you are swimming you won't be able to supervise her. You will then just be leaving your newborn baby unattended in a public place. If this was your private pool then no problem but it isn't - it's a public place.

You just seem more concerned about how to be able to do things as you did before rather than adjusting to your baby. You can't guarantee she'll be asleep at that precise time every week. And what about whilst you shower and change and get your DS changed after too?

Why not bring a friend or family member to watch her whilst you swim or indeed use crèche when she's old enough. I'm all for taking time for yourself - you've misunderstood me totally on this point - but life changes when you hsve s second and I think you need to think up a different way to do this and/or just wait a little while longer until you can use the childcare available.

Enidblyton1 · 23/09/2016 00:19

I've seen loads of babies in car seats (not pushchairs) at the sides of pools in various members clubs. Your club may not allow it, especially as they have a crèche, but definitely worth asking. YANBU to ask (and please ignore silly comments like those from Superstar - not helpful!)

Superstar90 · 23/09/2016 00:21

And to vitalite - I keep my newborn within eye sight - I carry her round in her carry cot or have a monitor on her. I wouldn't ever leave her unattended or without a monitor for more than a minute or so.

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