To think home schooling should be better monitored?

[Mollymoo78]

One of my FB friends from my toddler group days has announced on FB that she's home schooling her four year old. She was always very very attached to him and never had a moment away from him ie a night out. She breast fed him well into his fourth year and carried him in a sling when he got tired. I guess what I'm saying is that I'm genuinely wondering if her decision to home school has more to do with her being reluctant to let him go.

Her comments on FB are "well I have no precise plans as to what I'm going to do but they learn through play at this age anyway so it doesn't matter". I just felt quite uncomfortable reading that. It all sounds very vague. My dd has started school recently and loves it - the socialisation with her peers and older children, the physical activity, getting independence and rewards for her achievements. She's playing yes but she's also being taught to read and write. But what if this boy isn't given these things - who is going to be checking up on the education he's being given?

I don't mean to put a downer on homeschooling - I've no doubt it's the perfect option for those whose children don't gel with school but shouldn't you at least try school first? Am I wrong to question this in my mind?

I hate to wheel this out but my child was assaulted, by a teacher, in school because she couldn't cope with him.

Despite being academically able, he was unable to access the curriculum via mainstream school and would often be "lost" within the school for hours at a time. He even got out once and made his own way home across two busy main roads - he was five.

By the time he left he was non verbal, self harming and on the day he left covered in bruises and abrasions from being restrained. He was 8 years old.

Oh this must be an unusual case people say. No, it isn't. I know many HE children who have had similar experiences. There are court cases being fought all over the country for similar children. Those children that do make it through primary often drop out in waves to HE at secondary level as the structure relaxes and they can no longer cope.

What are we going to do about those kids and the LA's that are failing them? Anyone?

I agree Chikara that it does need to be addressed. How many children are being failed by schools but would also be failed by home education because the parents just don't have the resources especially financial resources.

"Still not answerable to you personally or the general public. "

So do you think you're not answerable to anyone or do you think you're answerable to your children? Children can't protect themselves so the population as a whole has to step up.

I'll refer you back to my previous posts where I quite clearly answered this. If you can't be bothered to read, I can't be bothered to retype it.

Answerable to my children? As in "I'm not going to leave my children floundering in a school system that is not appropriately supporting their SNs and LDs and is failing to provide them with an education, so instead I am withdrawing them and securing them a suitable education through home ed so they can grow into well adjusted self-supporting adults" ?? Duh.

Oh and all those incidents took place over three different schools including a specialist ASD unit.

and would often be "lost" within the school for hours at a time. He even got out once and made his own way home across two busy main roads - he was five.

Exactly the same situation with my DS. to you and your DS NickiFury

back to you jen as well as

Bad times. Home ed was the best decision I ever made for him.

SS is unfit for purpose in so many areas. Thecwholexsystem needs an over haul, I wonder when the model was devised, 1950's maybe

AlpacaLypse

both DP and I thought she was all set for Law up until eighteen months ago.

So had she not been demonstrating her maths abilities at school either?

(Thanks for the name compliment!)

Nicki Exactly. When my dc was 5yo, he was manhandled/restrained by a brand new deputy head teacher after a meltdown that was managed poorly by the teacher (she confronted him and got in his face and demanded he talk to her even though the agreed upon manner of dealing with it was to let him calm down in a "safe space" in the classroom). Dc of course didn't cope with that well, which the school should have expected, since his dad and I separated because he was abusive to the children - which the school was well aware of. Why, in their stupidity, they thought it would be good for a male school official that he didn't even know (reports of incident clearly state that the "deputy head introduced himself to the child") to then remove him from the classroom after he'd already calmed down, take him into a office alone, tell him off (dep head clearly stated he did this) and then put him in an isolation room and leave him there by himself while he cried and screamed that he just wanted to go back to class. Found out later the school was using the isolation room regularly for him without notifying me at all. He was 5yo. If I locked my child in a room alone, I'd be answering to SS, but the school was not held accountable at all.

I'm still considering it for DS. Agreed a change of teacher/class for DS at Easter break when the full extent of what has been going on became apparent to me. Massive change in DS, he is progressing very well, attending school willingly, no more hiding in bathrooms or running out of school. New class teacher this year, early days but so far so good. At 7 DS can't read. He is being assessed for autism and ADHD but I suspect dyslexia too now. School doesnt seem interested in knowing either way. I can't tell if his lack of progress is a "him" problem or because he wasn't being supported to learn. I'm giving it to mid term to see if there is progress in his new settled state, if not I think I'll take him out. Obviously nowhere near as bad as what your boy has gone through.

We get a few that arrive every year to sit their GCSEs with us as 'older students' - usually they are about 18-19 that have been homeschooled. Some are well rounded, capable young people but could do what they wanted because their parents did not give them an opportunity to to study useful GCSE subjects. Others are 'interesting' characters - one I remember used to come to college in a half suit of armor made of leather and would write in runes. He was exceptionally bright but had no idea that this wasn't considered acceptable- the saddest thing was he'd never experienced a field trip without his parents - he thrived in the end but it took him 4 years to get through what most students do in 2 years simply because it was all too alien.
I'm all for home schooling as long as there is some form of monitoring to ensure that the child is given a range of opportunities and that they are not being radicalised (had one of these too- was quite scary!) a bit how registered childminders are inspected and provide evidence of the suitability of their skills/knowledge and home environment

Shadowboy - But perhaps if those children weren't home educated, they would not have even managed to do any GCSEs at all. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking 4 years instead of 2 if it means that at the end, that student has managed something that will benefit him. They were learning at their own pace.

I would say that eight times out of ten any parent you speak to in the home ed community will get to a similar story ginger as the conversation progresses. They'll be talking about their decision and almost in passing a additional need will be mentioned "well DS/DD has dyslexia/ASD/dyspraxia/ADHD/ADD and just wasn't managing too well so we decided to give home ed a go". I'm not saying that many parents don't make the conscious decision to HE their child from the outset because I know many do, but in MY personal experience the majority are doing it because the school system is not appropriate for or has failed their child.

Sadly though this is pretty much unknown unless you've lived it and people would rather believe that home ed parents are weird/hippy/overly attached/abusive etc hence the constant calls for monitoring.

He was exceptionally bright but had no idea that this wasn't considered acceptable- the saddest thing was he'd never experienced a field trip without his parents - he thrived in the end but it took him 4 years to get through what most students do in 2 years simply because it was all too alien.

Any consideration given to him having a spectrum condition?

One day I hope that the same level of outrage will be being applied to the thousands and thousands of schools where kids with special needs are being routinely badly 'team teach' handled where correct procudure for this is not even pretended to be followed where kids with disabilities are routinely being locked up in what in reality are very small rooms that could be described as store cupboards but get called chill out zones yet they don't have free acces to these, or the children who come into contact with the on average 2 teachers a week who get struck off for being unsuitable to work with children.

As I often say I threads like this I don't actually like HE, I wouldn't HE a child of mine but thinking that coming into contact with a teacher reduces abuse is short sighted

Lots of issues are being confuses here. Education and welfare are being conflated as one single issue. CME (Children Missing Education) are being confused with EHE (Electively Home Educated) children.

Yes, all children should be safeguarded. But the way in which they are educated should not be dictated. And education does not have to include formal teaching.

Back to the OP, the child in question is below Compulsory School Age and doesn't have to be in education anyway.

Nicki I would have to agree. I also know a number of parents who are home educating their children as they didn't cope with mainstream, but the LA is refusing to give them an EHCP, or they are waiting on an EHCP (and have been for quite some time), or because the LA is refusing to agree to put them in the school that is suitable for them (funding). Are they being provided with tutors from the LA? Nope. Have they asked? Yep. Are they being "monitored" by the LA? Nope, in fact most of them are constantly going back to the LA to try to get more info on how their case is progressing (usually not progressing at all) only to be fobbed off.

I'm so glad this is all coming out on this thread. Won't make any difference though. Countdown begins to the next "concerned" home ed thread 10...9...8..........

allow well, yes, exactly, but unfortunately many people seem to like the "sledgehammer to crack a nut" approach.

Oh and the ones who want to attend school whose parents want them to attend they gave a school who accepts them but through no fault of their own they only get allowed to attend for a couple of hours a week and can remain on a combi of reduced timetables and informal unofficial exclusions

I started Home Edding my eldest because he didn't thrive in school due to some additional needs. I now also Home Ed my other children as I believe it is preferable to putting them through the school system. They are all working ahead of their age, have plenty of social opportunities through clubs and play dates.

Yes, there are home educators who don't let their children out of their sight. There are also parents of schooled children who don't let them socialise. There may well be children who don't receive a good education through HE. I'm damn sure there are children who are failed by the school system.

Monitoring HE leads to all kinds of problems.

Exactly Needs and who is responsible for their education in those situations? The school, as they are registered at a school, and available to attend full time, however, the school is only allowing them to attend an hour a day (for example as I know someone in this situation). Are they getting a suitable education? Of course not. And who will be blamed for this? Likely the parents, in the long run.

I think I've seen both the wonderful and the awful on the HE spectrum. A few of my good friends are very dedicated HE-ers and their children are fulfilled, enriched and engaged. I couldn't do it myself, but I have a lot of respect for them.

On the other side, I work in child protection and have seen a few awful circumstances where kids have been removed from school to "HE" as the parents don't want to engage with agencies or be under scrutiny, or can't be bothered getting them to the bus, and a lack of monitoring has let them slip through safeguarding procedures.

So I do think there should be more monitoring, to protect the most vulnerable, but I don't think it would be too difficult to have low level monitoring for those who are less in need and high level with appropriate intervention for others.

HE" as the parents don't want to engage with agencies or be under scrutiny, or can't be bothered getting them to the bus, and a lack of monitoring has let them slip through safeguarding procedures

I have to say that there was a hell of a lot of the latter I encountered. Kids of school leaving age almost completely unable to read and write who'd been withdrawn from mainstream education for spurious reasons and then left to their own devices for years by parents. It wasn't sickening Spry level abuse, but nevertheless it really mucked up their life chances.

Although I only saw the bad side of home education or more accurately its bad practitioners. I think some on this thread are blind to the potential risks. They seem to think that all home educators provide the same enriching carefully tailored educational programme they do and do it with their best interests of the child at heart. I'm sure most do. But a significant minority don't or can't. That's why I think more rigourous checks backed up with School Attendance Orders need to be enforced.

I find it very interesting that the government expresses a concern about so many children home educating, yet they do not even make an effort to address the reason that so many are choosing home education - that many schools (and LAs) are failing children across the country, especially children with SEN. Instead they keep piling on more and more SATs and advancing curriculum levels more and more, putting more demands on children that are already at breaking point now.

Then they criticise the parents for home educating. I know quite a few parents that would happily allow their children to attend a school that actually met their child's needs. Unfortunately after fighting for years, that just doesn't happen for many many children.