To wonder what the point of cms/csa is?

[PlasticBagMillionaire]

My DS's father has never paid a penny in support despite an ongoing case with csa. He's now 16.

My two DD's father was initially good at paying maintenance. When we separated, he used the cms website to calculate what he should be paying based on his salary and the number of times he was having them a week.

Then he met a new woman and started getting behind in payments and stopped turning up for contact. I waited months to involve the cms due to my previous bad experience but when it became obvious he wouldn't pay unless forced, I paid to start a case with them.

They advised me that they could only collect on his salary and not the undeclared rent he is receiving from lodgers and a commercial property he owns. That week he told me he is being made redundant. Coincidence?

He's also now telling me that they have advised him not to pay any maintenance until the case is resolved despite owing months under a private agreement between ourselves. He's also told me that he is justified in not paying me anything because he was advised by the cms that he's been over paying me the whole time! He got the figure himself from THEIR website!

I'm absolutely furious. They have basically just vindicated a man who they know isn't paying anything towards the upkeep of his DC in continuing to not support them. Wish I'd never bothered as I'm now a further £20 down on the application fee . Anyone else think this completely defies their purpose for existence? Aibu?

No point

I dont believe the cms have told him any of that.

Have you rang them yourself and clarified that what he is saying is true?

They are pathetic. I can't claim at all because they can't guarantee they won't disclose my address to my violent ex.

If I could he would pay less because 2 children who aren't his live with him and also we have more than 3 dc but he'd only have to pay for 3.

It's a pathetic system.

They won't tell you anything they have discussed with the other party because it's confidential apparently. I'm considering putting in a complaint. I just can't stand how unfair this all is. I want to cry from sheer frustration.

The only way I've ever got anywhere is by involving my mp. And that didn't even lead to regular payments.
They are fucking shit and not worth the stress. My ex owes me about 15k.

My first ex owes £thousands but since he hasn't bothered with DS since the age of two, it was easier to accept.

With XH, he still has the privilege of contact and is very demanding about it but continues to shirk all responsibilities. It makes me so angry that there's absolutely nothing I can do.

Actually, I feel like starting a campaign. It's not right and my feeling is nobody in power cares a jot because ultimately it mainly affects women.

The CSA was shit. The CMS is worse in my experience. They don't contact you. They don't do anything unless you push them. They want to sign off debts. I think the government wants to make it as impossible as possible for the parent with responsibility to claim anything as they don't want the cost of running this agency. Detest them. In contact with my MP about getting something done. Utter shite. Replies to letters that ignore every fucking issue I bring up. Registered letters of complaint ignored as well. It's a long haul but I'm owed thousands and I don't intend giving up even though my two are 18 and 17 now. The CMS set up a £20 per month arrears payment schedule so in other words if the aresehole sticks to it it'll be paid off when the kids are 29 and 28 respectively. Not fucking acceptable.

The CSA was shit. The CMS is worse in my experience
^ This and they are worse than useless because they create an expectation that some sanction exists when in reality, it doesn't take much to outwit them and game their incompetence.

Might as well close the whole thing down for all the good it does - it was only a political gesture by Maggie in the first place to all the Daily Heil pearl clutchers moaning about single Mums getting cash from the state.

BTW I am not unsympathetic in any way to kids being denied maintenance - as a nation we should hang our heads in shame that we don't do more to make this socially and morally unacceptable.