Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be waiting for the massive B******s?

237 replies

ladyjadey · 31/08/2016 20:33

It's late August. This time every year as the nights start to get darker, giant, evil spiders of doom run at me across the living room carpet. They lurk next to my bed, in the hallway and climb the curtains. They barricade themselves in the downstairs loo waiting for me to inadvertently lock myself in a tiny space and spot them, mid terrified wee. I have been waiting for two weeks now and it hasn't happened yet. Has anyone else been afflicted with the influx of gigantic leggy knobs?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
10
PelvicFloorClenchReminder · 31/08/2016 21:41

I thought this was going to be about massive biscuits. You got me all excited, and now I have spider twitch. Thanks for that Angry Sad

Mishegoss · 31/08/2016 21:43

I despise this time of year. I have anxiety anyway and the massive spiders send me batshit crazy. I check my bedding, scan every room in in, freak out at any movement I see. When people upload photos on facebook I cant sleep that night. I want to do the London zoo spider course because I'm getting worse every year but it's so expensive. I'm ridiculous between September and November basically.

GabsAlot · 31/08/2016 21:48

now this is a a spider

jacrispy · 31/08/2016 21:50

I flicked one onto my dm yesterday! He was a massive fucker. I was sorting out the washing he was sitting there happily on a pair of pants witch I fling in the air and he lands on dms head pants an all. She screams running around house with spider and pants on head! They wasn't even nice pants! Beast of a spider though!

Shakirawannabe · 31/08/2016 21:51

It's the return of the daddy long legs that I'm dreading Confused

jacrispy · 31/08/2016 21:52

Daddly long legs are massive leggy cunts! There just show off spiders with wings.

swizzlestar · 31/08/2016 21:53

I've found two huge hairy fuckers in the last few days. I'm terrified of them, and they're definitely targeting me. Luckily dh puts them out, but the neighbours must think I'm being murdered.

FuzzyWizard · 31/08/2016 21:55

I found a huge dead one the other day. Think the new cat killed it. I hope she's a spider killer and not a spider-player-wither

sophiestew · 31/08/2016 21:56

Please tell me you are all Up North?

I am Darn Sarf and don't usually see the huge fuckers until late September....

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 31/08/2016 21:57

Where are you all, there's no Shelob Spiders here yet.

FuzzyWizard · 31/08/2016 21:57

Greater London

BalloonSlayer · 31/08/2016 21:57

My sister lives in Australia and they have those massive ones, Huntsmen are they called? She says they often live in the patio umbrellas and fall on you when you open it up.

I thought of this when I opened the umbrella yesterday . . .

DNeice says one was under the sun visor of her friend's car and landed in her lap when she pulled it down. So: blinded by the sun, in control of 2 tons of lethal metal and a big bastard of a spider in your lap . . . yeah.

Farmmummy · 31/08/2016 21:57

I quite like them, in fact we usually (dd1 and I DH thinks we are nuts) name them when they take up residence. However "Amelie" pushed the boundaries when she (he/she?!) crawled out of my pj bottoms as I was getting changed tonight

jacrispy · 31/08/2016 21:58

I'm in West Midlands loads of the fuckers but biggest one was pants spider!

VanellopeVonSchweetz99 · 31/08/2016 21:59

'If you wish to live and thrive, let the spider run alive.’
They do make me sick to my stomach with fear. But they do eat harmful(ler?) bugs.
We've had some medium ones this week but what really gets me is the massive, stupid ones who will just sit in the hallway just where you normally walk, in the half light of evening. How do they even survive to get that big?
It's like stepping on a fucking plum?

AdoraBell · 31/08/2016 21:59

I was hovering the other day and spider ran for cover, into the gap in the door frame. T'is a bloody good job I'm not bothered about spiders.

Squiff85 · 31/08/2016 22:01

Haha I thought I was the only weirdo! I am the same, end of August-end of September I am just waiting for them to arrive !! They're coming for me!!

dementedma · 31/08/2016 22:03

Oh God. Am a wreck in anticipation as we usually get dozens of the huge hairy fuckers and there is screaming chaos in the house. But none yet so far. Could the crappy Scottish summer have driven them all south? I bloody hope so.

Arfarfanarf · 31/08/2016 22:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Reindeerlily · 31/08/2016 22:10

I used to hoover them up and then break a biscuit up and Hoover that too. Just to make sure the spider wouldn't crawl back out the Hoover and come and sit on my face.

mygrandchildrenrock · 31/08/2016 22:12

We've had some massive ones in the last week or two, ones so big you could saddle up and gallop off on them!
I got one under a glass last night and I swear it was so big you could hear it knocking on the glass as it tried to tip it over. I have never heard a spider making a noise on a glass before. It was like it had tap shoes on.
I have a wonderful spider catcher from Lakeland, it's like a hoover light sabre and I am now the Queen of the Spider catchers. They get safely taken outside and let free over next doors wall.

EtTuTuttiFrutti · 31/08/2016 22:14

One big one in the bath last week. No further sightings as yet.
Last year, fast asleep, dead of night I was awoken by a tickle on my neck, and there was a massive bastard sitting on my pillow (it touched me, gag, gag,gag,gag ). I couldn't see it because it was dark, but I went flying out of the bed.
DH had to undertake a prison type search of the whole room as it wasn't in the bed and tried to convince me that I was mad dreaming.
He wasn't going to be sleeping until it was located. About an hour later it made a run for it from under the bed.
Conversely I had a little one in my armpit whilst gardening last week and was quite chuffed that it tickled.

skankingpiglet · 31/08/2016 22:15

They seem to scuttle around our house all year round Angry

I was at home in labour with DD2 a couple of months ago during the wee hours. I'd had a nice bath to ease the contractions but had slightly overdone the hot water so felt a bit woozy as I got out. I put my towel out on the landing and laid down on it like a beached naked contracting whale to cool down (lovely image I know). Mid contraction I felt something tickly on my foot but was too busy focusing on my breathing to give it much thought, however as the contraction passed I felt it on my knee. Looked down... BIG FUCK OFF SPIDER Shock Shock I may well have broken the world record or the fastest moving woman in labour! Shoved a glass over it as a containment field and went about my business. Poor DH was rather confused when I woke him up an hour or so later and told him it was time to go to hospital, but first he had to deal with the glass on the landing Grin

SlinkyVagabond · 31/08/2016 22:16

Youse are all wimps! Try growing up in Oz where spiders will fight you for a place on the sofa. The ones in England hold no fear for me. Though Dh claims the one in the bathroom was trying to Nick the shampoo.

MillicentKing · 31/08/2016 22:16

Why am I reading this thread???
WHY?

I can't kill them unless they are actually on me or my bed then it's fair game but have lost one too many pint glasses accidentally chucking whole glass (with trapped spider) and paper out of window or door instead of just shaking the glass and running like mad!

My dad refused to remove them from my bedroom so I had to teach myself. Tough love.