No one cares if it is the first time you posted a fucking biscuit

[Sallystyle]

They really don't.

Why do people feel the need to announce their first ever biscuit? Like they achieved something special.

MN should ban that stupid smiley. It looks like a doughnut anyway.

It's not even a proper jammy dodger. It's a fucking cheap supermarket knock off.

And there was me saving my first biscuit for someone special....

Have my first ever

I like wine with my whine.

I am ignoring the fuckers who are posting biscuits.

Mycatsabastard Yup! Jaffa Cakes are BY LAW cakes!
In 1991 a court ruled in favour of McVitie's, meaning that Jaffa Cakes are exempt from VAT because they are cakes.
These points were considered:
The product's name was regarded as a minor consideration.
The ingredients were regarded as similar to those of a cake, producing a thin cake-like batter rather than the thick dough of a biscuit.
The product's texture was regarded as being that of a sponge cake.
The product hardens when stale, in the manner of a cake.
A substantial part of the Jaffa Cake, in terms of bulk and texture, is sponge.
In size, the Jaffa Cake is more like a biscuit than a cake.
The product was generally displayed for sale alongside other biscuits, rather than with cakes.
The product is presented as a snack and eaten with the fingers, like a biscuit, rather than with a fork as a cake might be. The tribunal also considered that children would eat them in "a few mouthfuls", in the manner of a sweet.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaffa_Cakes#Categorisation_as_cake_or_biscuit_for_VAT

I fucking hate the biscuit thing.

It is utterly pathetic and a lazy way to show that the poster has no actual retort.

And "have my first" - literally NO ONE gives a shit if it's your first biscuit. No one.

They should fuck right off and take the biscuits with them.

Why use a to show that a poster has no comment doesn't give a shit?

That's an arsehole, not a biscuit

I think they want a clap on the back for losing their biscuit virginity.

I thought it was a biscuit as in 'that takes the...'

It's such an old joke. It wasn't funny then. It isn't funny now.

All the pathetic knobs who just type biscuits on threads discussing the biscuits just prove the point.

We should have a 'summer holidays' symbol though. Like a wee parasol or an ice cream or something. To remind people there are bored kids on the loose.

Why would you give someone your first biscuit? Unless it's one of the that always gets broken in the packet. They can have that one. Unless it's a custard cream. No-one gets my custard creams.

Is the biscuit a reference to Gordon brown having tea and biscuits with the woman he called a bigot? Or did I dream that?

Following my experience I no longer believe posters when they claim to be dishing out their "first ever *.

It's just a cheesy line. Something they say to all the girls.

I couldn't give a fuck about your biscuits because you all know shit.

Look at my biscuit and revel in its glory.......

My first one.

AND IT'S MORE IMPORTANT THAN EVERYONE ELSES BISCUITS

We need a bourbon creme now.

They're just saying that it's obviously the dumbest thing they've read on Mumsnet so far, the first thing deserving a biscuit, more stupid than the average stupid post. I don't think they expect people to care that it's their first one.

It's from a politician being interviewed by mumsnet (think it was DC) and one of the questions asked was what his fave biscuit was. He refused to answer due to it being an utterly pointless and borderline insulting question.

It is now used as a way of saying that a poster is not worth answering due to goadyness or sheer stupidity or something.

I've never posted one.

I thought it was sort of "stuff this in your gob so the inane words don't keep coming out" kind of thing.

What is insulting about being given a biscuit anyway?
I think it means that the person who receives it has really "taken the biscuit" which the dictionary the following about -

You say that something or someone (really) takes the biscuit when it or they have done something that you find extremely annoying or surprising

Even if i had a pocket full of biscuits i wouldn't give one.

I don't understand the biscuit thing. I thought it was a jammy dodger anyway

I'm not even going to dignify you with a biscuit you grumpy bugger