To be fed up with the "we are having a considerably better summer than yaou" that goes on on Facebook?

[Puzzledconfusedandbewildered]

I know the answer is to delete Facebook but it's like a car accident I can't turn away from.

All summer it's been like one long competition of who can do the most fun things with their children and who can squeeze in the most days out. It's like I'm stuck in one of those sickening mummy blogs and can't find an exit to run away screaming from it all. So I await you all telling me IABU even though my tongue is firmly in my cheek about it all

Some people manage TWO holidays over the summer, we just go on one modest break away in London. It can be wearing yes.

I would rather see the happy posts than the moaning or passive aggressive ones.

I've become a lot more selective about what I post. 9/10 years ago I would have uploaded 100 photos of our holiday, now I just choose a few key moments.

I like to see my friends having fun. The blow by blow accounts via check-in can be a little tedious though - "driving to the airport - feeling excited" followed by "at Heathrow - feeling excited" followed by "at Heathrow - drinking champagne" etc etc.

I put pictures of some of our days out or summer activities with the children on FB. I do this because we live abroad and it provides joy to close friends and family (grandparents especially). My DF especially loves to have them on FB so he can show his friends.
I don't know if people think I'm being in some way competitive but I am really not and I am surprised that people might think this would be the case. I love seeing photos of my f&f pics too.

I definitely agree that I would rather see the positive than the negatives though, I definitely don't need to know about peoples dramas and all the cryptic posts etc!

I post loads of stuff that I do with the kids and of days out. Partly I do it because I love remembering when stuff pops up on the memories. Also I think Facebook is great for information sharing and often people will ask where we were because it looks fun and then go and have a lovely time there themselves.

Philipp- yes I could.... But I dont feel the need to. I prefer to keep things private. I take photos and do lots of activities with my kids and maybe send them to close family on WhatsApp.

I didn't say you should. I am simply challenging your thoughts that if something goes on Facebook, you aren't present and enjoying the day. People can do both of they want to.

Not posting on Facebook, does t mean you get more out a day out. People posting on Facebook are missing out either.

*It seems that every time people do something with their kids it has to go oh Facebook to prove to the world that they've done it

This is a recognised phenomena.* also I don't think it's a new one. There were people my parents knew who had to have slide shows to as many people as possible of their holidays, or cine8 films, or just interminable numbers of photographs passed round - I remember having to sit through a few of those myself. I can imagine a similar thread about holiday photographs in the 1950s. I'm sure the Victorians and earlier also knew the phenomena - at least you don't have to sit through looking at 1000 bits of Grecian urns, Egyptian scarabs or Roman pottery, followed by a sketchbook full of rubbish drawings - me on a camel in front of a pyramid, me in the Parthenon etc. And I'm afraid it always has been a form of boasting and always will be - but that's just how humans work.

Everyone's different. I'm sure most of us know people who brag and show off in 'real life', either to hide what's going on or simply because they like a bit of one-upmanship. It stands to reason surely that for this type of person a FB account is just a tool for them to do what they do and reach a wider audience. For others FB is a genuine 'this is what we did today' thing.

When you know the people personally you'll know who's who.

It's all crap really. One women I know posted about her and the dc spending the day at Alton towers, they bloody didn't because I saw her in Aldi which she swears she doesn't shop in anyway when I called her on it, she gave me some crap about people expect her to always be out having fun

I'm with Cuppa, one of the nicest things for me about FB now is the reminders of things you were doing a year ago. My memories today are of a day I spent with a friend and her kids where we had a brilliant (free) day out and it's put a smile on my face already this morning seeing the pics.

I find the snobbery around FB so tedious. I have some annoying people on my feed and I've just unfollowed them - job done.

I post a lot (by "a lot" I mean at least one whenever we go somewhere or do something nice, sometimes up to half a dozen, not 100s) of photos of DH and I out and about, and/or I check in to wherever we are if we're eating out or visiting an attraction.

I do this in part because DH has a degenerative illness that one day is going to kill him, and at a point before that is going to make days out much rarer and harder, involving wheelchairs and oxygen cylinders. I want to be able to look back in the months and years to come and remember the good days. I want to smile when FB Memories or Timehop pops up to remind me that two/three/four years ago today we were doing that great thing in that great place under his own steam.

I don't post much about his illness, not least to protect his privacy. So unless you know me very well, you wouldn't know this. Anyone mentally rolling their eyes at my "days out" posts appearing on their newsfeed is free to unfollow, defriend or, quite frankly, just fuck off with their judgey selves. The person with the problem is you, not me.

I post tye things we do on fb as have family who live in uk hundreds of milesaway andabroad. I rarely do a status other than stuff we are doing, certainly wouldn't post the mundane stuff as its boring and no one is interested, dp does stuff with them and doesnt take any photos or ever use his fb so if he takes them out it bakances as there is nothing on fb. A collegue said to me you do loads with your kids which is true we do, maybe I am annoying but its my fb and I post what I want to see if people dont like it hide me or defriend, simple!

I think a lot of people only post about the positive things in life because posting the negatives is fraught with difficulties. Yes, I might have the odd "Oh bugger, the washing machine has died" post but 90% of the things I want to rant about involve other people.

Bad day at work - potential to end up with a disciplinary. DH not pulling his weight - an adult conversation probably more conducive to resolving the problem than slagging him off on facebook, especially when we are FB friends. DCs driving me up the wall - maybe OK to have a rant when they are toddlers but not now they are pre-teens and are starting to have older friends with facebook.

I like to see my friends and family enjoying themselves. I'd rather look at posts about holidays and lovely days out than see lots of people moaning or airing their dirty family/relationship laundry on FB any day.

The whole #blessed, #lovinglife, "making memories" stuff does make me want to boak though.

I love seeing my friends have a good time. I love seeing their photos of travelling and other fun times, and often live vicariously through them when I'm stuck at my desk.

This. My FB friends are a select bunch, cryptic or 'me me me' posters get deleted very quickly. I don't think I've ever seen a #blessed or #lovinglife on my feed, if anyone posted that they'd be gone very swiftly. I don't understand why people use FB if it causes them so much grief.

I can't begin to imagine how dire someone else's life must be, if they think a nice photo taken at a family picnic is bragging.

How about you stop bitching, make a few sarnies and a flask and have a picnic of your own? Far healthier for you than resentfully scrolling through FB.

MaQueen - It's not that the people who choose not to share photos on fb aren't doing these things, were saying we do (in fact I probably do more than most people) we just don't see the point in updating fb about it. Well that was my point anyway.

That's fine Bee. You don't really use FB. I'm talking about people who do use FB, but it appears only to sneer at other people's photos/posts and grind their teeth in resentment.

Just bizarre.

Yes that is certainly puzzling

I can't begin to imagine how dire someone else's life must be, if they think a nice photo taken at a family picnic is bragging

This ^^

Horizons I scrolled past it on my FB feed and paid it practically no attention. I only remembered it when I happened across this thread on here, so I mentioned it because it seemed apt, and bit of a daft thing to post a photo of. She posts hundreds of pictures, not only of her holidays, but things like going into Boots to buy suntan lotion, and the taxi she went to the airport in.

I post photos when we do something interesting, nice etc. We live near the beach in the UK in a holiday area so are lucky to spend a fair bit of time on it. We have had a week away in the UK so I posted some holiday pics and we went to Harry Potter too.
However the other 80 per cent of the time, we are in the garden, with friends and family, down the local park, library or just at home. I post the odd photo of us then too.
Of course there are times when a child is upset, they are arguing, I am at the end of my tether or they are bored if it is raining.
Facebook is just a snap shot of lives. I have seen photos of Walt Disney World, a cruise, holidays to France, Turkey, Spain, Singapore etc this summer. Of course they weren't doing that all summer. I have an instant of ahh I wish I could go on holiday abroad, then I only have to think of how we coped in the heatwave when we were away in the UK and I wonder if it would really be all that great. Maybe when the children are older.
So it is all about perspective, personally I enjoy the lazy days at home, kids in bed, no time pressures, picnics in the garden, movie time etc a whole lot. My youngest also starts school soon so I am making the most of it.

YABU.

I am having a brilliant summer with my DC. They are 6 and 3 now, and it's been a real 'light at the end of the tunnel' few weeks - no potty training to contend with, no real tantrums, less whinging, they are playing together nicely...days out are actually fun rather than an ordeal.

I haven't posted about it on FB (I do use it regularly) but I will upload an album of pics at the end, saying what a wonderful time we've had.

I hope all my friends have had similarly excellent summers and have enjoyed seeing their updates and photos.

I have about six hundred friends on FB (and before you scoff, yes, I'm genuinely fond of all of them and don't have any strangers).

That means the few boasters are very diluted by:
-people asking for recommendations for plumbers
-shared articles about interesting topics
-photos of cats and puppies
-teenage friends' artistic creations

If you don't like your FB feed, you're doing it wrong. Tweak your settings unfollow anyone who makes you roll your eyes and follow some interesting Pages (eg I F L Science; HuffPost Good News) until the braggy posts don't annoy you any more.

OP - you'd enjoy the Mediocre Mum on FB (search the name). She's a friend of ours and wittily honest. Unedited joys and frustrations in realistic proportions.